


She's Like The Wind - Moments in time *Completed*

by SnapeLove



Series: Moments in time [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Adult Hermione Granger, Alternate Universe - Post-War, Angry Sex, Attempted Seduction, Complete, Drunk Sex, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Foreplay, Kissing, Light Angst, Light BDSM, Making Love, Masturbation, Oral Sex, POV Hermione Granger, POV Severus Snape, Power Play, Ron Weasley Bashing, Sex, Sex Toys, Sexual Frustration, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2017-01-12
Packaged: 2018-09-09 20:41:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 51,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8911210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnapeLove/pseuds/SnapeLove
Summary: Series of stories, each representing one moment (situation) in time. Snape survived war and he is closed off in himself even more. Struggling with his unwanted and newly discovered feelings towards his ex student Hermione. But, no matter how much he tries to avoid meeting her, their paths seem to intersect. Would he win or loose battle against himself? I'll add tags and warnings as I continue to write





	1. She's Like The Wind

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction using characters from the Harry Potter world, which is trademarked by J. K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it.
> 
> I got this idea while reading ff Doing it for the Order by Desert_Sea (on AFF) and listening to the 80's hits. This is imagined as part of series of short stories, each describing Snape's or Hermione's POV. I honestly have no idea where I'm gonna go with my next story, and this is first time I'm writing something with explicitly sexual contest, so bear with me, please. 
> 
> Also, I'm flying without beta on this series (too embarrassed to ask any of my friends to assist).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus struggles against his own feelings while helping his former student, Hermione Grainger, with the potion. He can win the battle of not showing his true feeling to her, but can he win the battle against himself?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction. Harry Potter is owned by J.K. Rowling. This story is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made from it.
> 
> A/N: 12.08.2018.  
> The story has a beta now, so it will be updated with beta-read and edited chapters.  
> And huge thank you to my betas inviteme and FawkesyLady (Tarma) <3

Severus resisted stirring uncomfortably wondering what he was doing here, in this minuscule office, deep in the bowels of the Ministry research department with his former student. Of course, it had to be  _ her _ \- Hermione Granger - the waving of her eager hand in class, her constant need to prove her worth, annoying him to no end.  Though no longer his student, she was still seeking his approval and demanded his guidance at her workplace.

The Ministry opened a new and highly demanding department that occasionally required his expertise and consultation as Potion Master – and, of course, it had to be  _ her _ .  

Disgruntled with his misfortune to survive yet another end of the war, appalled by the title of hero, he returned to teach at Hogwarts, shutting himself from the world. Two years ago, Minerva literally had twisted his arm, forcing him to accept Granger as an apprentice. 

Who else but the Gryffindor Princess, Hermione Granger, would choose an obscure research branch that demanded she apprentice with more than one Master over the course of five years. And who else than “know-it-all” to finish her task in little over two and a half years instead of five.   

He stifled a sigh at the memory of signing the contract, his agreement authored by his own sense of obligation to the student he had failed during her formal schooling. That forced Mastering was his demise - worse than service to Voldemort and Dumbledore put together, worse than a dull life as a teacher worse than anything he’d endured in his forty-four years of life. 

She apprenticed under him for eight months, two more than was expected. For the first six months he could not wait for the moment he could be rid of her presence. But then, when the date of freedom finally approached, much to his own surprise, he offered her two additional months to teach her more advanced techniques. She eagerly accepted and he passed his particular knowledge to her. Knowledge that was considered almost sacred and would be passed only at the end of a Master’s life. 

Severus could not explain his decision nor his actions, attempting to  justify his altered behaviour with the potential he saw in her . She had a brilliant mind and determination to change the world into a better place. He wanted to participate, to be the part of shaping her greatness, a mind that he’d finally recognized as kindred to his own. 

After eight months of her invasion, his classroom laboratory and his private laboratory felt darker without the shine of her bright eyes, too silent without her relentless well of questions. His evenings were dull without her persistent debating of one theory or another. It took him months to get his life back into a shapeless routine of solitude.  

Then, the letter arrived, a polite invitation that held an underlined “no refusal” demand to assist on her new project. For the first time since his trial, he was forced back to the Ministry.

As a result, he was here now, in this tiny office, watching her flawless elegant movements. The office was hot as a furnace, barely big enough to accommodate one, let alone two people. 

He was tortured by her presence once more. What was different was that she was oblivious to him, unaffected by his foul mood and rigid expectations. 

She moved around the limited space, and it seemed as if wherever he moved he was in her way. Severus wondered how many times he failed to avoid physical contact with her today. 

Heat wrapped around him. It was a heat that engulfed him from within as much as from outside. He tugged the corners of his robe tighter, knowing that he truly looked like a bat wrapped in its wings. But that was all he could do. Something needed to be done before he imploded.  

“Miss Granger, where might I find…” he cleared his throat uncomfortably “…the lavatory?”   

“Two doors down, across the hall.” She replied to him, not raising her eyes from the simmering cauldron. 

Hastily, he rushed to the seemingly empty lavatory. Occupying one of the empty booths, he cast  _ Muffliato _ out of habit. Severus sighed in satisfaction as he pulled off his robes, placing them on the hook at the booth’s door. With a murmured spell, he shed his frock-coat as well, placing it on the other hook. He uncuffed the sleeves of his pristine white shirt, cuffs that bit his skin like shackles. He groaned at the newly gained freedom of his wrists.    

Leaning one shoulder and his head on the thin wall of the booth, he tried to regain control over his body and mind. For someone who was used to absolute control over every thought, every syllable, every bodily function and reaction this, situation was…unacceptable. 

With an annoyed growl, Severus straightened himself and lowered his gaze to the seams of his trousers were the groin area appeared strained to the point of splitting. With a frown, he fumbled with the zipper, pulling the trousers and the white cotton boxer-shorts down to the knees. Allowing the garments to slide and wrinkle around his ankles.  

He groaned again, half in annoyance half in satisfaction, when his member bobbed free from the uncomfortable pressure of its tight, cottony prison. Lowering himself on the toilet seat, jabbing sharp bones of elbows in soft muscles above knees, he buried his face in his palms. This situation, all of this, it was completely inappropriate. He growled, feeling his swollen cock tapping lightly on his thigh. Seeking a solution to his problem, he started to list all the ingredients in the school storage, but the involuntary image of her body perched on the steep ladders while he plunging into her appeared in his mind. A painful moan escaped his lips. He sat up straight and shook his head. This was the ultimate betrayal. His body refused to cooperate, suddenly rebelling against him. He needed to deal with the situation immediately, before it becomes too…apparent.  

_ Maybe if I take off the edge… _  he argued to himself, slowly wrapping a hand around his shaft. He stifled a sigh of pleasure, refusing to acknowledge it. Lazily moving his hand up and down, he closed his eyes, conjuring an image of bright red hair and brilliant green eyes. He followed her light steps in his mind. Almost instantly, red hair was replaced with the fizz of brown curls, green eyes turned to soft brown, and light steps switched to bouncy ones. 

Startled, his eyes snapped open and he groaned in helpless frustration. That was not it, that was not what he wanted to see. His subconscious rebelled against him, refusing to cooperate. He hardened his grip, as if he were trying to strangle it into compliance, but pain sent a shiver down his spine. Not the desired effect.  He glared down at the organ, it's dark reddish colour resembled that of a mushroom head. It stood defiantly straight, unyielding to his own will .  

Growling again at the stubborn, rebellious member, he narrowed his eyes at it like that could intimidate it into obedience. It was all useless, his mind, his body, they seemed to developed the will of their own. Begrudgingly accepting that he’d lost the battle, he closed his eyes again. 

He focused on the honey smell of her hair and the faint fragrance of her body, she smelled like lavender mixed with her natural, fresh scent. Thinking of the sensation, his shoulder felt like burning when she leaned on him to steady herself while reaching for the book, small palm sending heat through layers of wool and cotton. Icy prickles on his chest bloomed in his memory, appearing where her soft breasts pressed on him, the tickle of warmth as her arms encircled him, one for support, other to reach jar with the necessary ingredient. 

He envisioned the gentle slope of her back, his eye sliding down to admire the firm globes of her rear as she called him to look at the cauldron, to help her asses the forming hue. That moment was his undoing, it was the final straw that broke his resolve. In small space of her office, he knew he needed to look in cauldron directly above, and she had no place to move. Reluctantly, he stepped behind her, peering over her shoulder, pressing her between the table and full length of his body. The table was just the … right … height, just like the hue of her potion.  

He stared at a now purplish head of his member with one bright pearl of pre-cum, as he twitched happily at the memory of her body pressed against him. Closing his eyes once again, maintaining a firm grip, he clung to the memory and resumed pumping. Brushing a thumb over the droplet, Severus moaned gutturally at the sensation. His imagination, running wild and rampant, forced unwilling image of her teeth, slightly scraping on sensitive flesh. Picturing her small mouth wrapped around him took the last ounce of self-control. His hand continued squeezing, running frantically up and down his length, hips bucking of their own primal accord. Heat pooled into his balls, who were contracted so high up that he fleetingly worried that he will need help from healers of St. Mungo’s later. Low, throaty growl escaped his lips, startling him, as he watched long streams of milky white essence spurting from him like a geyser, falling on the white of the shirt, coating his hand and thighs. Panting in large, heavy gasps, his body finally stilled. 

It took minutes he didn’t have for his muscles to stop trembling. With a hiss, retrieved his wand and cleaned the shirt, whipping the flesh with paper. Anger, diverted to himself, surfaced once again. Severus Snape was not a vocal person, yet now, now he was extremely vocal.    

_ What did you succumb to, old fool? Wanking off in a public toilet like a randy teenage dunderhead. _ He scolded himself, tucking now flaccid member back into its cotton coffin. Bringing himself into a presentable, wrapped up, appearance.  

Washing his hands, he splashed his face with icy water a couple of times. Narrowing eyes at his image in the mirror, he sighed. Proximity, it was just that, physical contact. He wouldn’t delude himself; he hadn’t a chance.

From the mirror, his reflection starred back. Forty-four-year-old face with hooked nose and white almost translucent shallow skin. 

What chance did he have of even being noticed by a young bright girl? What he had to offer? A tarnished past. Acerbic, barely tolerable disposition. He was…what he was? Lonely? Secluded? Snarky? Greasy git? Starved for affection? Randy? In love?  

Violently shaking his head, Severus denied the notion.  _ Ridiculous _ .

He walked the distance to her office before she had a chance to suspect anything. No, he will finish this and crawl back to his dungeon, to lick these newly gained wounds, unsure how to survive another disappointment, another shattering of his loosely taped heart? Slipping into a small, heated room he glanced at her before glueing his attention firmly to the active cauldron. 

Her presence was  palpable , occupying small space almost ubiquitous - he could physically sense her from the small patch of space he used.  

His eye was drawn to her elegant hands, shaking slightly as she prepared to add the last ingredient. Her shuddery breath wafted against him. She must have overthought the potion, still not confident in her own skill. It would not do.

Still not raising the eyes from the cauldron, not trusting his voice, he motioned her to go slowly. She added one single drop of liquid into the cauldron and golden haze puffed from its surface. The new bane of his life extinguished the fire swiftly, sighing profoundly with a faint smile of satisfaction. Her soft, melodic voice addressed him, causing havoc behind once again firm walls in his head. 

“Thank you for your assistance, Master.”  

_ Master. _ He was no Master of hers. She was brilliant; so talented, so young. This was an extremely difficult and experimental potion and she executed it perfectly. She was, even now, so much more than he ever hoped to achieve in his life. What could he offer her? Even if there was a speck of hope for him in her eyes, he would only be a noose, an anchor around her lovely neck. Severus Snape couldn’t offer her anything beyond his broken existence.   

Nodding, he mutely left the minuscule office filled with her scent, each step heavier than the last, back into the darkness that coloured his perseverance.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The inspiration for this story was the song "She's Like The Wind" (lyrics are below)
> 
> She's like the wind,  
> Through my tree  
> She rides the night  
> Next to me
> 
> She leads me through moonlight  
> Only to burn me with the sun  
> She's taken my heart  
> But she doesn't know what she's done
> 
> Feel her breath in my face  
> Her body close to me  
> Can't look in her eyes  
> She's out of my league
> 
> Just a fool to believe  
> I have anything she needs  
> She's like the wind
> 
> I look in the mirror  
> And all I see  
> Is a young old man  
> With only a dream  
> Am I just fooling myself  
> That she'll stop the pain?  
> Living without her  
> I'd go insane!
> 
> I feel her breath in my face  
> Her body close to me  
> Can't look in her eyes  
> She's out of my league
> 
> Just a fool to believe  
> I have anything she needs  
> She's like the wind
> 
> I feel your breath in my face  
> Your body close to me  
> Can't look in your eyes  
> You're out of my league
> 
> Just a fool to believe (Just a fool to believe)  
> She's like the wind


	2. Sometimes when we touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hermione has a predicament of her own, and it tightly connected to her Potions Professor/Master.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I never before wrote SS/HG story, so my interpretation of Hermione might be off, but I hope you will still like it. 
> 
> Comment what you like - don't like and help me to stir this bunny into the right direction ;)
> 
> P.S.: I am fairly new at all this, and I saw that some ppl subscribed so I changed settings into chapters. I also changed the title (just a little) and series name.

The door softly clicked closed, and Hermione forced herself to stifle the growl, distracting herself with cleaning up the work area. She picked up a set of phials and started to pour newly made potion in them, looking at golden liquid like it is to be blamed for something. Her thoughts wandered to one of the last conversations she had with her Potions Master 

_…"You still have irritating notion to fix everything that crosses path with you_ _,_ _Miss Granger. In time, you will learn that not all broken_ _…_ _things_ _…_ _can be mended_ _. Sometimes broken is just broken, and you out to leave it be."_  

_"Even the broken things have value, sometimes even bigger than new and shiny."_  

_"Your inexperience is mind-numbing_ _,_ _Miss Granger." his voice was even, words rolling from his lips like pearls from a broken string, she ha_ _d to force herself to divert a_ _gaze from his lips to his eyes._  

_"Did you ever learn about term_ _kintsugi_ _, Master? "_  

_"I don’t believe that I have."_  

_"It is Japanese art of mending broken objects with gold. Such object is valued and treasured because he has history, has a depth and beauty of … well, in a lack of better word…survival." she smiled mildly at him, searching his face for at least a glimmer of_ _his_ _comprehension_ _, about_ _what she was trying to say._  

_"And sometimes it is just a broken thing glued with a shiny adhesive_ _,_ _Miss Granger, nothing more and nothing less."_ _..._  

She huffed at the memory. In all honesty, she had no right to force her ideas on him, but the desperate need to find a crack in that armour he cocooned himself in was overwhelming.  

With a sigh, she picked up her wand and flicked it at the walls, they stretched and glided until her office was once again in its original size. With another flick, temperature lowered to bearable. All she tried was for nothing. Frowning, Hermione started to move around now spacious office grumbling to her chin 

"' _Good day, Miss Granger'_ , ' _You may proceed, Miss Granger'_ , " _Miss Granger, where can I find lavatory?'_  Three sentences, three barely half structured sentences in four hours! The man is insufferable!"  

She nearly started to laugh, wasn’t that how he called her? Warmth spread through her chest. She has to be patient, she knew this is going to be anything but easy. But the knot, tightly coiled in her chest egged her to push forward. Hermione leaned at the table, closing her eyes, familiar picture floated to her mind…eyes of, what she believed to be, dying man. The look in those eyes as he watched in Harry’s…she shook her head… No! not Harry’s eyes. The eyes of the women for whose son he died. At that moment, Hermione saw her Professor for the first time, not as a Professor, not as a member of Order or Voldemort’s right hand. He was so human at that moment, he was just a man. As he drew his last breath, something deep down in her just broke off and fell, something she even didn’t know she possessed.  

When they placed his body along with all others that lost their lives that day, her heart just stopped beating. Then, she could not explain why. Not until the moment, it started to beat again, when she heard cries of Hufflepuff student ' _Professor Snape is alive, he’s breathing_.' At those words, her heart fluttered, the wave of weakness washed over her and she had to sit down, tears of joy rolling down her face.   

She sighed deeply, opening her eyes. Yes, she was in a quite a predicament. Five years, five long years Hermione did her best. First to fight the notion until it was time, and later to plan and plot how to reach her goal. Shaking her head, she bitterly laughed at her own naiveté. Series of short, and quite unsatisfactory, relationships just strengthen resolve to pursue her heart's true desire. Much to her cringe, her heart desired probably the most inaccessible man on this planet. Preparing to leave the office for the day, her thoughts floated back to the past again. 

_...He was lying_ _unconscious_ _in the temporary medical tent, havoc all around him, but he was unaware of it. She crept inside, kneeling next to him, her trembling fingers feathering across his face. Even then, feel of his skin had an electrifying effect on her. Leaning to his ear she whispered softly_  

_"Fight. Fight and survive. Now I know and I will turn_ _heaven and earth to make you the happiest man on this planet. I’ll find the way."_ _her lips briefly_ _grazed_ _his…_  

Hermione touched her lips with trembling hand, heart beating wildly in the hollow of the chest, stomach knotting. Ever since that day, she had crushing desire to hold him. Hold him, until she is sure that he is safe and happy. Hold him, until her fear subsides, fear that she won’t be able to keep her promise. Fear that he…she…never will be happy in life, ever again.   

With determent steps, rushed to meet Jenny, her lifelong muggle friend, her confidant. Jenny was the only person that knew about her love, and she was lucky – Jenny gave her support to pursue the man, despite the age difference, despite everything she told her (which was every single little thing) about him. Partially, Jenny was one to blame for today. Jenny’s motto _All is fair in love and war_  and her persuasive nature pushed Hermione to twist every arm she had to twist until firstly, she managed to secure her apprenticeship with him and now his assistance on her project. And all that lead to today – the day when Hermione swallowed her pride.  

Walking into a small cosy muggle coffee shop Hermione smiled at her friend. Flopping on the chair across her friend he sighed a frustrated huff. Jenny pushed a glass of wine to her and asked instead of greeting 

"That good, huh?"  

"I swear, Jen. I don’t know what is the stuff that man is made off! Like he is no human at all!"  taking a large gulp of chilled dark liquid from the glass "I did everything, **everything** I could think of. The only thing I didn’t do is brew that potion naked or jump on him. And I’m not so certain that I didn’t do the latter, just maybe not that obvious." 

"Slow down, Herm. Just tell me from the start, what happened?"                

"He spent four hours with me today. I shrink the walls so there was barely room for me, I raised the temperature in my office. It was beyond hot and you know what he did? He stayed wrapped up in that robe of his, wool, pure wool! Anyway, I found an excuse to be near him, well sort of. I pretended I need a book so I leaned on him to get it. Then I nearly hugged him to reach for the ingredient. For a few seconds, I was leaning on him. Oh, Jen, you can’t imagine how it felt! I was pressed, full frontal mind you, at his chest. I swear, after that, I had a need to run to the toilet and change my panties." Jenny looked at her meaningfully "I was…drenched. It took all I had not just to…ravish him, on the spot. In the end, I called him to help me, he had to stand behind me. Jen," she took another gulp of wine feeling heat pooling in her core "I was compressed between him and the table."  

"And?" Jenny refilled her glass 

"And nothing! If it was another man, any other **normal** man, at that point I’d be bend over that table and he would be humping me like a madman. But nooo! Severus Snape is made of stone." she finally allowed her frustration, all pent-up desire, to tremble in her voice 

"Nothing?"  

"Absolutely nothing! But, ohhhhhhh! What a body!" she giggled at Jenny’s expression "Do you remember that book about Africa, mom and dad had? Well, he is like that. All firm and slender. You just can feel how strong he is! What that body could do to me. What I could do to that body!" she pressed her heated palms to even hotter face, squirming on the chair, there was a hollow place between her legs that ached to be filled "What if he sees me as nothing more than his pupil. A child, nearly half his age? What if he **can’t** see me as a woman at all?"  

"Hermione, you were never a child, you are born old." Jenny looked amused, but with heat that tore through her along with now a third glass of wine she just didn’t care "You never spoke about his body before." 

"I could…do you think he might like it?" frowned Hermione 

"Like what?"  

"I would tie up his hands, above his head, with a silk scarf. I would lick and bite every part of his body until he begs me to stop. I would…I want to see him falling apart beneath me, over and over again. Until he’s addicted to me. What should I do?"  

"First of all, you need to simmer down or I’ll be forced to hose you down. You or those guys who stopped talking and listening to your rambling carefully." chuckled Jenn "Secondly, why the change of heart? Why are you suddenly willing to settle for pure physical attraction?"  

"It occurred to me today…what if he is incapable of love anymore?"  

"Nonsense." 

"You have no idea, Jen, how he loved her. He was obsessed with her. He did everything humanly possible and beyond for her. And she just brushed him off. That manipulative, sleazy, stuck-up bitch! I know she is Harry’s mom but … ughhhhhhh! How could she do that? To HIM? He is so smart, so smart beyond the possibility of comprehension and brave. He is the last knight that walks this earth. Soo valiant and noble. And he is so alone."     

"Mhm, he is a male version of you."

"I would give my life to see him looking at me the way he looked at Harry’s eyes."

"Harry’s? Herm didn’t you ever considered…"  

"Don’t be absurd! Harry has his mother’s eyes, we are listening to that for ages." 

"So, nothing, you say?"

"Nothing." whined pressing her face on the cold surface of the table between her sprawled hands 

"Did you try to seduce him, before today at all?"  

"What do you think I was doing in course of eight months I was his apprentice?" 

"All right, it obviously wasn’t enough. We are getting back to seduction part. **Subtle** seduction at first presentable opportunity. This cold – hot – cold shower thing might actually work to your advantage in the end." 

"Jen, you are such a Slytherin! Did I ever tell you that?" 

"Every time we speak. So, you are willing to go with **my plan** next time?"  

"Use a snake to catch a snake." grinned Hermione "You don’t mind me calling you a snake?"  

"Nope, snakes are easy. Lioness on the other hand…your friend’s mother is lucky to be dead. We will meet soon again, to plot a trap, in the meantime, I have a gift for you." Jenny pushed a bag over the table and she eagerly opened it "I wouldn’t take out that gift in public. You have a decent supply of batteries as well."  

"Jen! You are not a seer, are you?" Hermione blushed to the root of her hair 

"No, but I did have a hunch."  

"But, how?"  

"My dear, as smart as you are…, your logical brain just managed to skip some more interesting social occurrences. For example, physical seduction is a two-way street and given from all you told me about your man, somehow, I had a hunch that you’ll need this gift tonight."  Jenny glanced at the watch "We will meet again soon, but I have to run now. Enjoy your gift, use it well."  

Hermione watched her friend walk out of the coffee shop, then looked in the bag again. That. Was. Just. Not. It.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not a 80's song, it is more late 70's, but it was perfect to give me idea for this chapter. Lyrics follow:  
> "Sometimes When We Touch" - Dan Hill 
> 
> You ask me if I love you  
> And I choke on my reply  
> I'd rather hurt you honestly  
> Than mislead you with a lie  
> And who am I to judge you  
> On what you say or do?  
> I'm only just beginning to see the real you
> 
> And sometimes when we touch  
> The honesty's too much  
> And I have to close my eyes and hide  
> I wanna hold you til I die  
> Til we both break down and cry  
> I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides
> 
> Romance and all its strategy  
> Leaves me battling with my pride  
> But through the insecurity  
> Some tenderness survives  
> I'm just another writer  
> Still trapped within my truth  
> A hesitant prize fighter  
> Still trapped within my youth
> 
> And sometimes when we touch  
> The honesty's too much  
> And I have to close my eyes and hide  
> I wanna hold you til I die  
> Til we both break down and cry  
> I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides
> 
> At times I'd like to break you  
> And drive you to your knees  
> At times I'd like to break through  
> And hold you endlessly
> 
> At times I understand you  
> And I know how hard you've tried  
> I've watched while love commands you  
> And I've watched love pass you by  
> At times I think we're drifters  
> Still searching for a friend  
> A brother or a sister  
> But then the passion flares again


	3. Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus having a ...nightmare...a steamy one at that ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I'm aware that this is not "the best" - but I had a song and this story stuck in my head whole day (it is not funny when you are at work and have these images rolling in your head), anyway - now I can't force myself to "fix" the wording, the idea just stuck with me. 
> 
> I hope you are going to like it, at least a little :)

…His heart was beating so fast and strong, threatening to tear a hole in a rib cage and launch from his chest. Looking at the halo of brown curls that surrounded her head, inhaling deeply the honeyed scent. In the dim light of the darkened room, her skin radiated a soft glow, like a pale ray of moonlight I the gloom of the night. Standing behind her, tentatively raised right hand encircling, her in a loose, touchless, embrace and tucked one curl behind the ear. With the lightest of touches, traced the gentle curve of her lobe. She let a small sigh escape her lips, tickling hairs on his hand. Gliding fingers at the juncture of ear and jaw, down the neck to the collarbone. His head was devoid of any thought, he lived in that loose ghost of a touch, in the softness of the only connection between them. She drew one shuddery breath, expanding her chest in preparation to speak. Abandoning her skin, pressed one finger over her lips, leaned carefully, still avoiding the touch, and whisper  

\- Shhhhhh. Keep your eyes closed at all times. You are not allowed to touch yourself or me. You are, however, allowed to be… vocal…. provided that you don’t ask questions or debate. Disobey and all this, this… engagement is over. As long as you wish me to continue, you will follow the rules. –  

Just the slight nod of her head signalized that she agreed. Still holding a finger over her lips, he sunk teeth into soft skin, in the lovely dip where her neck sloped into a flawless length of a shoulder. With another hand, lightly traced ridges of her spine, leaving the trail of goosebumps on its way, resting a palm in the curve on the small of her back. She shuddered, small mewl vibrated on his finger.    

Breaking all contact, circled around her, soaking the sight before him, the natural beauty of her curves. With the tips of the fingers traced her silhouette, from the line of her neck, over the outer sides of her breasts, down the waist and over the curve of the hips. Her eyelids danced, but she never even cracked a peek at him. Her hands spread into the fan and curled in a fist repeatedly. A small smirk spread on his lips, she was fighting the urge to touch him. He yearned for that, his skin almost painful from need, but if he allowed that touch…all would be lost. No, he had to maintain control, control over his urges. This was all…about…her.       

In few fast steps, he scooped her into his arms, lifting her up like a child. She squealed, squeezing her eyes hard, curling hands in fists and tucking them in the space between her breasts in an attempt to prevent touching him. Smiling at her attempt, he gently placed precious content from his arms onto the cottony surface of the bed. Ivory sheets complemented her skin tone perfectly. Hair spread around her in a lovely disarray, sitting next to her, he played with one spring of the curl, rolling it around his finger. Just watching her breath, anticipating his next move, made his breath hitch and the heart swell.  

Hovered a hand above her breasts, marvelling their shape and fullness. They were not too big but they complimented her willowy build perfectly. Two dark nubs peaked, hard and defiant, above slightly wrinkled pink areolas. He placed his hand in the valley of two milky white globes and she exhaled sharply, pressing shoulders deeper into the mattress, lifting her chest toward him, silently begging for a touch.  

Shifting the weight, balancing himself, with admiration and almost fear, lowered his mouth, blowing slightly over one mouth-watering inviting nipple. She whimpered, curling her fists into bed covers. He took one nub in the mouth, stifling the moan at the taste of her skin, rolling his tongue over it, brushing with hand over the other nub. She cried in satisfaction, pushing her chest to him even more. Testing her limits, he pressed the nub in his mouth with his lips, soft cry got little louder. He mildly sunk his teeth in it and she cried loudly, mumbling something incomprehensible. He squeezed a bit harder on other nub and reaction was the same. Reluctantly his mouth released the tasty raspberry to play with the other. Her breath was irregular, she was mewling now without breaks, mumbling.  

Finally, abandoning her breasts with his mouth, he raised just to watch her face. Fingers teased and squeezed her nipples, lightly pinching and tugging, causing her to pant and sob, pressing her thighs strongly one to another. Her eyes screwed shut, as pleasure pinched her face in a lovely mask, her hands twitching pushed deep into the mattress.  

Still playing with her breasts, tracing the line from their valley to the navel, leaving a wet trail of kisses. Watching with fascination as her flesh erupted with prickly feeling. Nuzzling the mild dip of navel with his nose, he released her breasts and she cried in rebellion, her hands fluttering at the bed.  

Switching position, placing his mass at her feet, separating her legs with a width of his shoulders. Her thighs, opened for him eagerly, exposing an enchanting view, a hidden treasure. His member twitched happily at the sight and he fought the urge to simply sink in her warmth. Placing himself comfortably between her legs, intertwining long fingers into the neatly trimmed bed of curls that covered her mound. A quiet chuckle escaped from his chest, the curls bounced like small springs at the touch, a true testimony to her recalcitrant nature.   

 Tracing the line of the groin with thumbs, revelled in her reaction. She surged upward, fluttering her eyes then squeezing them tight, battling with herself to stay inside the bounds he placed. Hovering briefly in that position before flopping back to bed and pushing the pelvis to him. The softness of her thighs trembled as he inhaled her scent, tightening the skin with his thumbs, nuzzling the shy hood with his nose. She breathed one quivering “ _Oh, Gods!_ ”. Using hands to spread the petals which hid sweet-smelling flower, for a brief moment basked in the heat she radiated. His nimble tongue swept from entrance of her core to the hooded bundle of nerves, the nub twitched and peeked from its hiding. Above him, she was chanting the breathless litany of “ _yeses_ ”. Repeating the movement in opposite direction, drawing mewls from her, he stiffened his tongue and slowly dived into her centre. Her walls trembled around agile muscle that lapped at the nectar she lavishly provided, her cries risen to the new heights, a music to his ears.   

Directing nimble muscle to the apex of her sex, toying with a plump marble, sneaked one finger in the depth of her scorching cavern. Walls closed around his digit as he glided it leisurely in and out, curling it slightly and lightly brushing spongy patch, listening to her gasps and whimpers. Pulling it out just before her walls could fall apart. Not releasing, the candy with which he toyed, from his mouth, waited. When she growled in frustration he slid two fingers back inside her. Latched to her, teased her to the edge but never allowing her to go over, he watched perspiration slickening her skin. Her walls quivered again and he prepared to retract his fingers when she moaned   

\- Please…. please…I…need…I can’t…please…- 

He smiled and curled the fingers again, giving her what she asked for so sweetly. Moving his mouth to trembling whiteness of her thighs, biting into damp salty flesh. She screamed and collapsed around his fingers, trapping them in a death grip, cutting circulation, her back arched high above the bed. He smiled, patiently waiting for her to descend from her high and release him, affectionately kissing skin bruised with an uneven bite mark.  

Once free from her clenching insides, crawled atop of her positioning himself at the entrance, her hand danced towards him then fell back. Capturing her lips into a kiss he breathed 

\- No more rules, do as you please. – his hips glided onward and soon he felt blissful… 

 

…Severus sat in bed gasping for air, in the space deprived of oxygen, chest painfully constricted. Sweat coated him with every unsuccessful drawing of air, alternating between hot and cold. Chill air of the dungeon prickled his wet skin. Eyes frantically scanned pitch dark of the room. The rush of blood deafened him as hart pumped wildly. Of all the nightmares that he suffered through the years… this nightmare… this dream… this…this was the worst. Clutches of panic drove him on the edge of a heart attack. Minutes sipped as he struggled to steady himself. Finally managing to gain control over his reactions, slacking the shoulders slightly, blinked into the darkness. Trembling hand brushed over sweat soaked forehead   

\- Merlin. – breathed, the sound of his own voice scratching his ears – I have a problem. – 

Angrily untangling from sheets, twisted around him like a deadly vine, padded to the bathroom. Heavily leaned on the sink cabinet. Image in the mirror glared at him mockingly  

“ _Dirty old pervert. Cradle-robber. You sick, weak…_ ” - Don’t you look at me. - growled – She is not for you. Not for you. You do not deserve someone so pure. –   

Stepping into the shower, turned only cold water handle on. Groaning painfully when ice cold water stabbed him, his muscles violently contracting and twitching, heated skin erupted in painful prickles. Grounding his molars, forced himself to stay under the glacial stream. His skin seemed to heat itself from within, resisting the chill bite of the shower. Adamant in his decision, he lingered under the shower until his teeth started to chatter.  

Shivering, finally stepping out from the shower, wrapped himself in the soft bathing robe. Rushing to the living room in his quarters, ignoring shivers and bite of the icy stone beneath his feet, filled half of the tumbler with Firewiskey and downed it in one swing.  

Four months, four months of iron self-control passed since that dreadful day at the Ministry. Four bloody months, and now this. His eyes fell on the envelope placed on the mantelpiece of the fireplace. He growled at it. Pouring another portion of alcohol into the glass he waved his hand and the fire roared. Plucking the envelope from its place he sat into the armchair. The bloody thing was indestructible, he tried to burn it, to misplace it, to shred it. No matter what he tried the envelope always waited for him on that same mantelpiece. Damn them, damn them all. Can’t they all just leave him alone? Let him disappear. Bloody Ministry Ball! A menacing growl escaped his lips.   

He took a large swing from the glass, whiskey burned his way down the throat and his eyes watered. Staring at the fire he fought, for the second time this night, against rising panic. She will be there. Painful tug of the insides forced another gulp of whiskey. If her invitation was anything like his, she will be there. He hurled the invitation to the fire, the paper burned and then appeared on the mantel above. Severus grounded his teeth in helpless anger. The bloody thing RSVPed his attendance the moment he opened it.   

\- Freedom of will and Greater good, they don’t go together in the same sentence, never did. – mussed – Merlin, save me. What am I going to do now? -     

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman" - Bryan Adams
> 
> To really love a woman  
> To understand her - you gotta know her deep inside  
> Hear every thought - see every dream  
> N' give her wings - when she wants to fly  
> Then when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms  
> Ya know ya really love a woman 
> 
> When you love a woman you tell her  
> that she's really wanted  
> When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one  
> Cuz she needs somebody to tell her  
> that it's gonna last forever  
> So tell me have you ever really  
> \- really really ever loved a woman? 
> 
> To really love a woman  
> Let her hold you -  
> til ya know how she needs to be touched  
> You've gotta breathe her - really taste her  
> Til you can feel her in your blood  
> N' when you can see your unborn children in her eyes  
> Ya know ya really love a woman 
> 
> When you love a woman  
> you tell her that she's really wanted  
> When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one  
> Cuz she needs somebody to tell her  
> that you'll always be together  
> So tell me have you ever really -  
> really really ever loved a woman? 
> 
> You got to give her some faith - hold her tight  
> A little tenderness - gotta treat her right  
> She will be there for you, takin' good care of you  
> Ya really gotta love your woman...


	4. I go to extremes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus mussing over his...predicament. Will he come up with a satisfactory solution?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, first of all, I felt bad for posting something so poorly written yesterday. Second, my hun had nagging need to discuss every little incorrect detail in the text, giving me a male perspective >.<
> 
> Thanks to the combination of all this and unfortunate listening to Paul Anka - this is my attempt at redemption ;)  
> I hope you will enjoy it!

Another group of dunderheads filled the classroom, he sighed inwardly, with a little luck they won’t blow up themselves or him. He paced through the class, peering at startled faces. In this class, none of them had even an inkling of talent or necessary skill for potion making. This was his personal hell, but what he was to do? Hidden deep into the roots of Hogwarts he was safe from news reporters, from “hero” groupies, from everyone who wanted a pound of his flesh. Narrowing his eyes at the class he dryly intoned    

\- Today we are making Shrinking Potion. Instructions are on the chalkboard. Take your ingredients from the storage room and begin. If I hear even a peep out of you, you are automatically earned yourself five days of detention with Mr Filch and deduction of 20 points for your house. You may commence. -  

Severus was sitting at his table, one eye on the class and other on the parchment he used to scribble on. “ _Face it, you old fool, you are as eloquent as fifteen-year-old dunderhead when it comes to your own feelings and desires._ “scolded mulling on that unfortunate… dream… nightmare… a glimpse of heaven(?) as he did days before, analysing it in an attempt to discover the root of the problem “ _Ok, the beginning was quite normal, albeit a bit unorthodox._ _When did, the things went haywire?_ _Tasty raspberry_ _,_ _plump marble, … candy!?_ _Spongy patch!!!_ _– **anatomically incorrect**!_ _A true testimony to my own…idiocy._ ”  

Those were not adjectives he used, ever (!), little less to describe parts of the anatomy, his or anybody's. “ _Maybe it is not about her at all_.” that thought was…shooting, a balm to his raw nerves. After all, he was forty-one. He was young by wizarding standards, relatively powerful wizard with strong magic, he was on top of it all…a healthy male. Now when the threat was gone, when he didn’t have to struggle on a daily basis, just to see another day… After all, he had needs and severe intolerance to stupidity, his pent up sexual frustration just leached to the only female, in his immediate proximity, smart enough to be…interesting to him, no matter how inappropriate that was.  

Stirring uncomfortably on the chair, he blew a puff of air through the nose. The need to adjust the rising…situation in his pants was alarming. Choking out the growl he stirred again. If this continues, he will seriously have to revise switching to wizarding robes. Hiding a bulging erection in tightly tailored pants was…impossible didn’t even begin to describe…impropriety of his situation. Especially if prominent hill around the groin area had unnerving tendency to make itself known to everyone, even under the frock-coat. It stubbornly refused to remain private. For a second he imagined himself in wizarding attire, tented in a certain area, the picture was quite…disturbing.  

“ _Cold showers don’t w_ _ork anymore, not to mention_ _I’m heading for fast pneumonia if I continue like that. No, the matter has to be addressed in another way…_ ” 

He should take the matter in to…his own hands…so to say. There was no point in creating the situation that will lead to needing to seek help from Poppy due to a severe case of blue… 

\- Mr Wilkins if you put that in Miss Wilkins cauldron I will test her potion on you. – his dry voice startled the class – Miss Wilkins, raise that wand any further and you will have to test **your** potion with or without the addition of your brother! – he started to rise from his chair then changed his mind and remained seated – 10 points each from Hufflepuff. And 5 points from Ravenclaw Mr Jones for pure idiocy, remove that cauldron from the fire before you blow it up. – growled 

“ _This…situation…_   _is_ affecting _my teaching._ ” another growl escaped him and students in the first row looked at him with fear. He scoffed at them, pondering how justified would be if he releases some of his distress on their heads.  

“ _Poor wording aside, I need to shake off that dream, before it kills me or worse…someone realizes what is going on!_ ” unsure of whom he tries to delude. He refused to ponder on a possible partner, even as passing affair, at least now there was no lack of interested parties. Frowning he thought of all the witches that send him letters, throwing themselves at him, offering…half of them couldn’t write a letter without making him desire nothing more than to take his red ink, correct mistakes and send them corrected drabble back. Groaning in frustration, he managed to scare the first row of dunderhead again. No, options were limited as they were before. If he knew himself, and he did, even one poorly structured sentence would effectively and permanently…deflate… the situation.  

\- Time to finish up. Bring me your potions correctly bottled and labelled. Clean your workstations and leave. – he hissed at class – Mr Wilkins, you earned four days of detention, report tonight to Mr Filch. Miss Wilkins, you report to your Head of House and Headmistress. -   

“ _Thank you, Merlin. This is the last class for today. I am not sure how much of this I could endure._ ”  Severus wasn’t sure if thought referred to idiots he had to teach or to his overly lively organ that took upon itself to seemingly permanently imitate flag pole. Waited patiently until the last student left the classroom, then locked and warded the door and retreated to his quarters. Suddenly, he felt tired. Shaking his head, sheading layer of clothes he moaned in relaxation. As of lately, layers of buttons and material seemed like a vile trap, a means of torture designed to prolong his suffering.  

Filing the tub with the warm water, sighed. “ _When did I stop thinking of Lily?_ ” he shook his head, him and Lily, that chapter of his life was over. Over for a long time now. “ _Maybe if I try to indulge to this…irrationality(?)…_ ” he didn’t see the problem in that, as long as it stayed between these walls “ _And the walls of a public toilet in Ministry Research Department._ ”  

Glancing at the reflection in the mirror, he appraised his image. He wasn’t badly built, his look approved over the years, he was not anymore that man, skinny to the point of starvation. Lean muscles discretely stretched under the still firm skin. And he was…well-endowed in some other areas. He possessed a certain level of skill, about that he wasn’t certain but he never heard any complaints. Albeit, there weren’t many of them, and they were scattered over the course of years, but certainly, there were no complaints. Not that females rushed to complain when you are Death Eater, but some of them returned, more than once (!), that had to count for something. 

Moreover, there was nothing foul about a bit of an indulgence in lusting over free, sexy, smart witch. She was free, frowned, Daily Prophet didn’t report anything on her for years. She was probably sexually active female and equally, well probably not equally, frustrated by the lack of…activities.  

“ _She might even be inclined to consider him, purely as entertainment_ _of course_ _, provided that he allows her to put a bag over his head._ ” he shook his head violently refusing that idea. 

If, he is to allow this…fantasy…to play out, in privacy(!), …that might be safe. Not to mention… helpful. His member jigged at the thought. A soft sigh of release escaped him as he reached a decision. Submerging into the warm water that caressed his body like silk, he closed his eyes. Wrapping hand around proudly upright member he groaned, that felt…good. He was not ready to think about how it would feel…no, not yet, but her moans and sighs were enough if he had to judge by his dream. Curly bush of her mound danced before his eyes.  

“ _I wonder if she is really curly down there._ ” shuddered, the hand was gliding down the length of his shaft languidly “ _I wonder if she really tastes that good._ _Let’s see how things would play out if I take control._ ” 

Firming the grip, picking up the pace he imagined her standing above him. His hands gliding over her groins and down her legs, climbing up along the inner walls of her thighs. Imagining her shiver and sigh at his touch. His hand was moving fast now, making him groan and moan like a teenager. Yes, he would spread her lips with one hand and let his tongue play with a sensitive bundle of nerves. He would gently ease his fingers inside her, two of them (!), and leisurely explore every ridge, every wall, every nook and cranny. He would learn every point inside of her that makes her mewl and cry, that makes her beg for more. He would pump his fingers alternating speed to see what suits her the best…until he speeds up in a frantic… 

Wait, that was not it! The image of her mound dissolved in a multitude of white spots. His hand was blurring over his member, brushing over the sensitive head with every stroke. Water sloshed, spilling over the tub’s edge, as his hips bucked in a hectic rhythm. Loud groans and whimpers filled the dead silence of his bathroom, culminating in a cry of release. His body jerked in spasms of bliss.  

Yes, this could work, only if he is twice mean to her as he would usually be. He could entertain himself with the idea of her, as long as no one knows. As for the danger of involuntary reactions of his body on the rare occasions they must occupy the same area…well…he wasn’t Potions Master for nothing. Lazy, satisfied grin danced on his face, this must be how freedom feels like.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I Go To Extremes" - Paul Anka
> 
> Call me a joker, call me a fool  
> Right at this moment I'm totally cool  
> Clear as a crystal, sharp as a knife  
> I feel like I'm in the prime of my life  
> Sometimes it feels like I'm going too fast  
> I don't know how long this feeling will last  
> Maybe it's only tonight
> 
> Darling I don't know why I go to extremes  
> Too high or too low there ain't no in-betweens  
> And if I stand or I fall  
> It's all or nothing at all  
> Darling I don't know why I go to extremes
> 
> Sometimes I'm tired, sometimes I'm shot  
> Sometimes I don't know how much more I've got  
> Maybe I'm headed over the hill  
> Maybe I've set myself up for the kill  
> Tell me how much do you think you can take  
> Until the heart in you is starting to break?  
> Sometimes it feels like it will
> 
> Darling I don't know why I go to extremes  
> Too high or too low there ain't no in-betweens  
> You can be sure when I'm gone  
> I won't be out there too long  
> Darling I don't know why I go to extremes
> 
> Out of the darkness, into the light  
> Leaving the scene of the crime  
> Either I'm wrong or I'm perfectly right every time  
> Sometimes I lie awake, night after night  
> Coming apart at the seams  
> Eager to please, ready to fight  
> Why do I go to extremes?


	5. Take My Breath Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hermione has a plan...plan how to seduce Severus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that after this chapter I will have a beta, so posting will probably go a little slower but with better English :)

Impatiently, Hermione was teetering on the street, cold December evening didn’t help her in an effort to settle down.

-Finally, I froze myself to death! – she cried as Jenny appeared around the corner, she shoved a parchment in her friend's arms – Here is your permit, don’t lose it. –

\- Herm, you know I’m nagging you to show me your world since forever, but are you absolutely sure? -  

\- Jen, this was your idea, and if I’m going through that, so are you. Besides, my “saviour of the world” title won’t last forever. That paper in your hand will. – Jenny raised an eyebrow on her and she grinned – Let’s say that I’m finally milking my hero status to my advantage, while I still can. –

\- I must be rubbing of off you. – smiled her friend as she dragged her through the overcrowded inn and through the gap in the wall into the Diagon Alley – Wow, talking about stepping back to the past and one of the fantasy books combined. –

\- You didn’t see anything yet. Did you bring it? –

\- I did. I also brought you a new supply of batteries, by your request I take it that you like my gift. - 

\- I misuse your gift way too often, “like” is not even close enough to describe how helpful it is…and still, it is not, …just not… - she shook her head – We are going to Twilfitt and Tatting's first, I got the permit for the dress too. All pureblood snobs going to have a fit, when we enter, imagine muggleborn and a Muggle in the most prestigious clothing shop in London! –

\- You are still fighting lost causes and fights against injustice. – they started to laugh.  

Jenny was right, Hermione did choose Twilfitt and Tatting out of spite. They entered the shop and silence fell between customers. Shop owner called her quickly in the back room.

\- Thank you for accepting my request. –

\- Yes, yes, do you have all necessary? –

\- I do. Here is the permit, and here is the dress. Jenny… - her friend gave the dress, and shop owner nodded with satisfaction.

\- This is a very lovely model, quite unique. What alterations and which colour did you had in mind? – asked her and Hermione grinned broadly.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

 Two days later, Hermione stepped out of the bathroom; she had a huge knot in her stomach. Her hands trembling, she could not control the tremors

\- How do I look? Are you sure? I still have time to change… -

\- Harm, you are rambling. –

\- I always ramble when I’m nervous. –

\- You are not the one who should be nervous, not with that look. –

\- Are you absolutely sure? –

\- Darling, you are going to leave a trail of heart attacks in your wake. Now take your … cloak and let’s go, before we are late. –

Hermione gave her friend one unsure look. She was a tight ball of nerves. She didn’t see him or hear from him since that day in the Ministry. And night after night she spent in her bed imagining and abusing sex toy her friend gave her. It didn’t alleviate her need, if nothing else, it only made things worse. She turned to Jenny

\- You really think he’s going to notice me in this. –

\- Herm, if he does not notice you he is either blind, dead or gay. Now move along. I am, for once, eager to attend the official event, who knows maybe I snatch me some handsome wizard. –

\- Just be sure to check with me, Harry or Weasley’s, many of the purebloods still hold prejudice against muggles and muggleborn. The war may be over but… –

\- That’s why they are called prejudice. How are things going with Ron? –

\- We are still at odds. He still can’t fantom why I choose to take apprenticeship or carrier instead wishing to be an incubator for an army of redheaded brats. –

\- And you weren’t that gentle in breaking news to him. –

\- I just couldn’t…-

\- Darling, you were never one to be with one man if you desire another. –

\- And you are? –

\- I’d made them fight for me. I’d choose the one that wins, and keep other as a lover or a lackey. But that’s me. Just be sure to show me that man of yours so I don’t sink my fangs into him. Are you sure he will appear? –

\- If his invitation is like mine, Harry told me that after last year fiasco they sent special invitations to all “heroes”. –

\- What happened last year? –

\- None of us showed up. – they giggled, Hermione was grateful to her friend for chatting her nervousness away.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Stepping into the ballroom at the Ministry, she had a feeling that a nest of snakes coiling in the pit of her stomach.

“ _How ample, considering…_ ” she mussed, scanning the room. Suddenly her heart thumped, stopped for an instant than start beating crazy fast. Jenny gave a small painful yelp as she jammed her nails in her friend’s wrist.

 - He’s here. – she whispered turning her back to the crowd in the hall

\- Where? Are you sure? –

\- Of course, I’m sure. – she hissed in a hushed voice – Gods! I have never seen him in anything but his teacher’s clothes. He’s in Muggle suit now. He looks…hoot. –

\- Breathe. –

\- I’ll go to say hello… - her friend stopped her the moment she turned

\- No. You will not say hello, you will dance with him. But not right away. Mingle a little, dance few dances with others. Let him notice you first. I see your Harry friend, let’s go to say hello to them. –

\- Are you sure? –

\- Herm, we agreed, my way now. Subtle, remember? –

\- What if he leaves? –

\- Harm, not a single male will leave until you go, I can guarantee you that. –

\- I’m not interested in others. –

\- What do you want? –

\- I want to take his breath away. –

\- And you will just follow my lead. - 

They walked to the Harry and Weasley family. Hermione fought the urge to turn her head and fix her gaze on him. Everybody complemented her look, but with all the attention she received not even once managed to catch a glimpse of black eyes looking her way. As the evening progressed she became restless, every time she caught a brief sight of him, he was alone, secluded from the crowd with so familiar scowl on his face.

She danced with Harry, with George, even with Ron; she danced with two of her Masters. Many wizards asked her to dance, offered her a drink or tried to engage her in conversation. Fast, she was tired of the people around her, not even one held her interest. She moved behind huge glass ornament in the middle of the room, looking at him. His suit was tailored and fitted him perfectly, black trousers and jacket with silk shirt in the shade of dark smoky grey. He held a rigid posture, painfully obvious that he didn’t want to be here.

Clutching her glass, she briefly closed her eyes. In her mind, she kissed away that deep dark dissatisfaction off his face. She would peel off his clothes, one item at the time, revelling at the prospect of unpacking him – like a precious gift. Shivering she called the memory of his body pressed to hers, every firm shape she could sense. Opening her eyes she looked at his direction but he retracted to the dark seclusion of the huge window niche. With a deep sigh, she looked around hall looking for Jenny.

Jenny was flirting with young Ministry clerk not far from the place where Severus hid. With determined paces, she headed towards her friend.

\- Pardon me Mr Jenkins; I’d like my friend back. –

-  Of course. May I say, Miss Granger, you look simply stunning. May I ask you for a dance, later perhaps? –

\- Thank you, and no, you may not. – growled at the clerk and he swiftly walked away

\- So much for subtlety. – giggled Jenny – Gentle as a ton of bricks. –

\- My skin crawls from him and the likes of him. – she growled

\- Yes, you do look a bit flushed, as in angry red. And I have to say, that shade of red does not compliment your hair or your dress. –

\- I am not… **angry**. – she widened her eyes at Jenny

\- All right. Why don’t you dance some more, as I recall you loved dancing since you were little. –

\- No, thank you. I receive indecent proposals even without dancing. Three of them offered me a walk around the Ministry corridors. One asked me to show him my office! Ron asked me if I changed my mind, I wanted to hex him into the next week. –

\- There must be at least one person here with whom you can dance without desiring to place him in the hospital. – Jenny darted her eyes toward the dark corner behind the column where two of them were standing. She beamed at her friend

\- You know, I believe there is. –

Hermione took one deep breath, took a swing from her Champaign flute and gave it to Jenny. Mouthing silent “ _Wish me luck_ ” she walked around the column. He was leaning on the wooden frame, looking through the window. She plastered her most naïve polite smile and approached him with slow, unstable steps.

\- Good evening, Master Snape. – he raised his head and looked her directly in the eyes….

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Take My Breath Away" - Berlin
> 
> Watching every motion  
> In my foolish lover's game  
> On this endless ocean  
> Finally lovers know no shame
> 
> Turning and returning  
> To some secret place inside  
> Watching in slow motion  
> As you turn around and say
> 
> Take my breath away  
> Take my breath away
> 
> Watching I keep waiting  
> Still anticipating love  
> Never hesitating  
> To become the fated ones  
> Turning and returning
> 
> To some secret place to find  
> Watching in slow motion  
> As you turn to me and say  
> My love
> 
> Take my breath away
> 
> Through the hourglass I saw you  
> In time you slipped away  
> When the mirror crashed I called you  
> And turned to hear you say  
> If only for today  
> I am unafraid
> 
> Take my breath away  
> Take my breath away
> 
> Watching every motion  
> In this foolish lover's game  
> Haunted by the notion  
> Somewhere there's a love in flames


	6. The Lady In Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sev's POV...Hermione's plan works...then again, it is not hard to seduce someone who is already in love, isn't it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Until I catch up with my beta...bear with my broken English, pls. 
> 
> I work like a maniac and this...., well, this is my escape from work overload soooo.... I do enjoy in writing this snippet, so they will continue. I'm also curious to see how things are going to develop. 
> 
> This chapter is more of a fluff and angst than smut. Now, I'm not very good at fluff, but I hope you're like it.  
> And keep those comments coming, tell me what do you like - dislike, they are giving me good insight in what direction story should go :)

Severus Snape handed his cloak to the boy on the entrance and stalked into the half-full room, his plan was to show up, linger for short time and then leave, keeping a minimum of contact with other guests. Ministry Ball was epitome for the lack of “free will” as far as he was concerned. He was not here of his own volition, no, they forced his attendance. If Severus hated anything in his life, it would be this situation, the lack of possibility to refuse. Snatching a glass of whiskey from passing tray, holding it like it was his lifeline. He came early, aiming to avoid the majority of guests, and if possible, to avoid… **her**.  

Familiar voice, one of those he was hoping not to hear cried his name, stopping him in his tracks

\- Professor Snape! – the face of Harry Potter came to a view

\- Potter. –

\- You came early. –

\- I’m not planning to stay long Potter. -

\- I’m afraid you won’t have much choice, Sir. None of us has. After last year, we all received **special** invitations, they are like a magical contract. None of us would be able to leave before ten. – he looked at the boy who was smiling sheepishly at him and growled – Yes, I can sympathize with that sentiment. When I told Hermione, she was ready to hex Kingsley, I had to hold her. –

Short pang stabbed him somewhere between shoulder blades at the mention of her name. He couldn’t suppress a small smirk at Harry’s words. Harry’s name was called and he excused himself, rushing off. That suited him well, he found dark, secluded corner and moved to it. Well-placed scowl and half growl kept anyone crazy enough to attempt conversation with him at bay.

He idly scanned the room, nursing the second glass of whiskey when **she** appeared at the entrance door, accompanied by an unfamiliar female. Breathing a sigh of relief, not realizing until that moment that he dreaded of her arrival, dreaded to see who would accompany her. His heart started to beat fast, muffling all other sounds with a rush of blood in his ears, his eyesight blurred just for a second.

She was a vision in red. The upper part of her dress hugged her body perfectly, covering it and at the same time revelling it. Two thin golden stripes lead a trail over her shoulders. From the hips, the dress was spreading into the soft cloud of material that floated around her legs. Transparent red shawl, placed with magic to stand in desired arrangement covered her bust, following the golden stripes, forming small wavy sleeves. The transparent red material gave a lovely blush reflection to her face and skin beneath. She twirled, turning her back and he swallowed hard. The two ends of the shawl, glided through the air, enchanted not to cover a patch of exposed skin. The dress had a V-shape opening on her back, held by a golden cord, laced from her shoulder blades to the dip on the small of her back, exposing the silvery softness of her flawless complexion.  The fizz of wild hair was subdued in a simple but elegant nest of curls on the top of her head, with only a few strands deliberately left free.

The red material of the dress had a distinctive golden hue, and he couldn’t help but twitching his lips into a small smile. “ _Gryffindor Princess in Gryffindor colours_ ” Muggle dress, enchanted to fit into a magical world, knowing her, she probably molested a bunch of Ministry workers, not to mention tailors for this outfit. Following her progress across the ballroom towards the Weasley bunch, he noticed golden dust covering her eyes, complementing a shine of her soft brown eyes. Her full lips, in a same shade of red with a golden hue, matched her dress perfectly. He closed his eyes, forcing his body to stay put, resisting the urge to grab and press her at the nearest wall, to remove every single trace of red from her lips with kisses.    

Retracting deeper into the shadow, taking good care not to look at her directly but his eyes never left her, not even for a second, hiding from the sight of others. His hand shook slightly as he raised the glass to his lips.

She was, beautiful butterfly, moving among the crowd. She danced occasionally, she danced with Potter, Ron and George Weasley, with two of her rotation Masters. But as the evening grew old, more and more suitors surrounded her. He could bet that they would give their lives, just to get a portion of her interest, even for the smallest amount of time. Listening fragments of conversations, rude, lascivious, tasteless snippets of conversations, he had the desire to take out his wand and start hexing left and right, roaring to leave her alone, that she is taken…his. Except….she wasn’t.  

Closing his eyes, he took another gulp of whiskey, allowing slow burn to glide down his throat. If continue like that, he was on a good path of becoming an alcoholic, something he despised. Feeling like a Quasimodo, looking at Esmeralda, but he wasn’t…Quasimodo was poor disfigured, tortured soul. Severus Snape was completely different kind of monster all together. Opening his eyes he met a silvery gaze and frowned.

\- It looks like you found a perfect hiding place. – drawled familiar voice

\- Not perfect enough, you found me. – lowered his eyes to the glass in hope that intruder would catch a drift and walk away, knowing that with this intruder that was never the case.

\- Yes. Did you see that…Ganger girl? – her name rolled against thin lips like something offensive, and he suppresses a twitch of his hand, ready to damage snobbish blond

\- Who didn’t? – his eyes wandered over the crowd

\- Do you know she got a special permit? She brought a muggle…a muggle to the Ministry ball. – bitterness laced with poison annoyed him

\- Don’t forget the dress. A Muggle dress she’s wearing. The one you are drooling about. – his voice was flat and dry, he looked at his glass again

\-  Hmmm. Do….

\- It is not smart to be seen, publicly, conversing with me Lucius. – his eyes finally met the cold gaze of the man in front of him. Lucius just raised his chin and walked away, insulted. It was a newer smart thing to insult Malfoy, but he just didn’t care.

Swore under his breath, just for a moment he lost fiery vision and now she was nowhere to be found. Suddenly, she emerged from the crowd, walking in long gliding steps, her face a frozen in the polite mask but eyes burning with fury. Retracting deeper into the shadow, into the seclusion of window alcove, hiding from her sight as she passed near him, not even noticing. Leaning on the window frame he listened to the conversation she had with her friend. Grinning inwardly to the brush of she gave some nameless suitor.  

Her sincerity, her almost rude, blunt need to speak the truth, consequences be damned, was a breath of fresh air in this pond of stale water full of fake smiles and empty polite phrases.  

_“- There must be at least one person here with whom you can dance without desiring to place him in the hospital. –_

_\- You know, I believe there is. –_ “

He closed his eyes, not wanting to know who the lucky bastard she’s going to choose.

\- Good evening, Master Snape. –

The soft voice stopped the flow of air in his lungs “ _No, this is not happening. I’m drunk and I imagining things._ ” Raising his gaze he looked at a pair of brown eyes.

\- Good evening, Miss Granger. Are you having a pleasant night? –

\- Pleasant isn’t the word I’d use to describe this night, but there is still time to save what can be saved. – her smile shifted from polite to nervous – Master Snape, I was wondering… Would you do me the honour of dancing the next dance with me? -  

He stared at her. His mind, every rational thought in his head screamed at him to say “No.”, but, her small soft hand extended to him. He should have run, listen to his instinct for self-preservation. It was almost outer body experience, as he watched himself, ignoring the cacophony of voices in his head, taking her hand in his.

\- It would be my pleasure. – replied with a small bow

The first tact of music started and she leads them to the dance floor. A soft smile glimmered in her eyes. He was more than a little surprised with the melody he recognized as Mugglemnc song. Fighting internally to prevent his palms from trembling and sweating, one thing Severus could say about himself was that his palms never got sweaty…until now. He carefully tucking his hand under the flowing ends of her shawl and almost timidly placed a palm over the patch of naked skin on her back, praying that his hand won’t start trembling. Settling smoothly in his embrace she whispered  

\- Do you know about Muggle music, Master? –

\- I am fairly familiar with it; I know maybe more the most of the wizards. – she nodded and loose curls caressed her skin, he wished he is one of those curls

\- They say that Barry White is “the man” when it comes to melodies for seduction, but I always disagreed with it. Dean Martin has a much better voice; he sounds like a warm embrace and makes your heart beat a little bit faster. Jenny… -

\- I beg your pardon? –

\- I don’t know how, but Jenny made them play this song. Ever since we were little we loved to listen to Dean Martin. I love this song. –

The lyrics started and she stopped talking, near to him, erasing the line of polite distance, leaning her body next to his. She was short, even in high heels she barely reached above his chin, at the moment her temple was leaning **on** his chin.

**_Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore **[1]**_ **

**_Hold me close, sway me more_ **

The song was fairly unfamiliar to most of the guest and the steps to rumba were not familiar, they were almost alone on the dance floor. He was aware of stares. Their posture overstepped boundaries of politeness. She melted into his arms, moulding her body to his, leaning on him fully. Moving into the rhythm with him, in perfect unison, like they danced million times before tonight, her posture screaming to all in the room that she is his, his to take, his to do what he’s pleased. Was she even aware of that?

A sharp stab of pain turned into a dull throb as he realized that she had her eyes closed. He was the darkest; the most dangerous wizard in the room and this bit of a witch in his arms closed her eyes. She **trusted…him!**  trusted him to lead her, absolute surrender on her part. Disregarding the politeness and etiquette, he drew her closer, snaking his hand up her back, pressing his palm on the bare skin that burned him to the bone. 

Always restless mind jabbed a searing dagger in his heart “ _She doesn't think of you, she’s just enjoying the melody, singer’s voice. You are the tool, just a tool._ ”

If this…this dance, this moment is all he could have he would gladly take it. Take it and cherish, grateful for the opportunity to experience it.  He could live hundreds of lives, and he could die thousands of deaths, but this death now was the sweetest. This memory, this feeling…he will carry to his grave. The World could crumble around them and he would dance until the music stops.

Last beats of the melody stopped and she stepped away, his body howled at the loss. She directed her slightly dazzled eyes to his, making him feel dizzy. Her arms still holding him, preventing him to leave

\- If I may be so rude, Master, to impose myself on your person some more. You see, I’d appreciate if you’d be so nice to rescue me from the crowds. We could go to the balcony and discuss…discuss the continuation of my project. –

His heart was beating in his throat, somewhere beneath Adam’s apple; he should say “no”, refuse her and walk away. He was breaking the agreement he made with himself. Accepting her plea would be beyond borders of sanity, beyond the cruellest form of self-torture he could think of. He did none of the sensible things, but nodded

\- Consider me your saviour for the evening Miss Granger. –

She beamed at him, tucking her hand in a crook of his elbow and they left the dance floor.

 

[1] Sway by Dean Martin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This song was inspiration for this chapter, even if they dance to another song ;)  
> "The Lady In Red" - Chris De Burgh 
> 
> I've never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight,  
> I've never seen you shine so bright,  
> I've never seen so many men ask you if you wanted to dance,  
> They're looking for a little romance, given half a chance,  
> And I have never seen that dress you're wearing,  
> Or the highlights in your hair that catch your eyes,  
> I have been blind;
> 
> The lady in red is dancing with me, cheek to cheek,  
> There's nobody here, it's just you and me,  
> It's where I want to be,  
> But I hardly know this beauty by my side,  
> I'll never forget the way you look tonight;
> 
> I've never seen you looking so gorgeous as you did tonight,  
> I've never seen you shine so bright, you were amazing,  
> I've never seen so many people want to be there by your side,  
> And when you turned to me and smiled, it took my breath away,  
> And I have never had such a feeling,  
> Such a feeling of complete and utter love, as I do tonight;
> 
> The lady in red is dancing with me, cheek to cheek,  
> There's nobody here, it's just you and me,  
> It's where I want to be,  
> But I hardly know this beauty by my side,  
> I'll never forget the way you look tonight;
> 
> I never will forget the way you look tonight...  
> The lady in red, the lady in red,  
> The lady in red, my lady in red,
> 
> I love you...


	7. Could I Have This Kiss Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two sneaky friends...one enchanted mistletoe and one rather passionate kiss on the balcony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got the idea about this story as third part of "What happened at the Ministry Ball" set. At the beginning, I had an inspiration for his and her POV...  
> Then someone mixed duet from the 90's into 80's songs, and I was reading "Second Best Holiday" by Anonymous (she wrote her story on a prompt) - and I just got this idea.  
> Some of you asked me to give them a little nudge, personally, I like this game of "cat and mouse", complicating a problem with a painfully easy solution (like most things in life). But why not indulge in both?  
> I hope you like it! And don't forget to comment ;)

Severus and Hermione were standing on the balcony, deeply engrossed in extremely boring conversation about combining charms work with potions. Jenny huffed looking at the scene

\- Those two don’t have a romantic bone in their body. – she mumbled. From her perspective, they appeared to stand in the middle of the snow-globe. With the corner of her eye she noticed George tinkering with one of the mistletoe's, he was doing that all night – All is fair in love and war. –

She approached remaining Weasley twin with a sly grin, grabbing him by the arm

\- I need your help. –

\- How may I be…. –

\- Cut off the politeness. Now, are you ready to play a trick on our mutual friend and your former professor? –

\- Aha, I’m listening. - 

\- I’ve seen you sending those, - she pointed at mistletoe – to the oddest of couples all night. At the moment, they are standing on the most romantic spot and discussing **potions**. They are killing the mood quite brutally; I believe a small retaliation is in order. -   

\- What did you have in mind? –

\- Send one to them, but…with extra punch, if it’s possible. –

\- I’m listening… - drawled George, pointing his wand at one of the mistletoe's, she floated through the air to him

\- Can you…force them to stay in that kiss a bit longer…if they just a peck, next step would be hexing, force them to…feel the mood? –

\- Sticky lips! –

\- Ha? –

\- The charm, sticky lips. They won’t be able to separate for a while, but for how long? –

\- Hmmm, duration of the song, just how to pull that off? –

-I can charm it. Do you have a song on your mind? –

\- I do, can you transfer a song from Muggle playing device? – pulling a mp3 player from her hand purse

\- Show me. –

She pointed at the song on her mp3 player and George tapped it with a wand, mumbling something, few sparks jumped to the mistletoe. Plant floated to the ceiling and avoiding couples drifted to the balcony. They grinned at each other

\- Jenny, you have a devious mind, we could discuss your employment as my adviser. –

\- Maybe later, I wanna see this. –

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

\- …are you aware that alchemist’s and potion makers struggle, with the very same potion you are talking about, for ages. What makes you think that you can solve a problem? –

\- I won’t claim that I will, but with your cooperation and …I discovered one common denominator, crucial mistake they all made. I’d say we have a fair chance. –

He looked at her, peering at the fiery vision down his nose, red suited her, as she discussed her stand with fiery passion

\- You drive a hard bargain, Miss Granger. -    

\- So, will you at least give it a thought Master? –

\- I can’t promise anything, but I will think about it – “ _And say yes like a fool that I am._ ”

Bells chimed above their heads and they looked above at the merrily dancing mistletoe.

\- Blast it! – he swore, growling, feeling his heart rate quickening – What are we going to do now? –

\- Well, we can appease the beast now, or we can ignore it until it starts howling like a siren and appease it then. -  he looked at her with one of his trademark classroom gazes – Honestly, Master, if Narcissa Malfoy could kiss Flitwick with a blessing of her husband, I don’t see what can be wrong with a little peck. – she smiled softly

“ _Plenty can be wrong. Luckily, I took the potion before coming here._ ” – Ministry should take care where they take their decorations. – growled – But I suppose you are right Miss Granger. Sirens will draw too much of undesired attention. I do apologize…-

\- Master, you didn’t set this thing on us, there is no need for apologies.  – she tried to appease him stepping closer, his heart lurched up the throat, drumming its way too fast. She placed her small hands on his shoulders and propped to fingers, he still had to bend “ _Just a quick peck, do it as fast as you can and then run!_ ”

Hermione trembled in anticipation, thanking George for his mischievous product, the dance and at least one quick kiss, no matter how small could keep her going until she finds a crack in his armour. She drew a shuddery breath and neared him. He had a rigid posture that screamed how uncomfortable he felt.

Their lips meet just for a moment, but when they tried to separate, their lips stayed leached one to another like someone glued them together, soft beats of “Love Me, Love Me by Dean Martin” started to play. They growled in unison

\- Weasley –

\- Jenny –

\- What now? – he mumbled against her lips, feeling utterly ridiculous as a tidal wave of panic threatened to drown him.  

\- We make the best of a bad situation. – she whispered stepping even closer and tilting her head in a better position, leaning her lips fully against his.

Snape closed his eyes, thanking Salazar, Merlin and all he could think of for taking the potion. Reluctantly, he placed his hands against the thin of her waist for support. The taste of her was almost more than he could bear. His insides crumbled into a tight ball beneath his solar plexus. She curled her hand around the lapels of his jacket. This was something he desired so much, dreamt about it, and now he wasn’t sure if it was real or just a product of his muddled mind.

She smelled like a fine mixture of honey, lavender and jasmine. For the second time that evening, her body melted against his, moulding itself to accommodate him. Soft breasts pressed against him as she snaked her hands back to his shoulders, looking for purchase. His body rebelled again, against his better judgment, his hands tightened around her body in a firm embrace, drawing her even closer.

He desired nothing more than this moment to last for eternity. Muscles on the back stiffened when he felt her tongue brushing lightly against lips, seeking, asking for entrance. Lips parted without consulting the brain.

Hermione suppressed the moan when his lips granted her entrance. She revelled in his smell, fine mixture of herbs and earthy scents. Heat pooled at the lowest point of her stomach, and she pressed her pelvis as close to him as she was able, unable to control her reaction. Her tongue lightly brushed against his, before went to explore sharp ridges of his uneven teeth.

She wanted nothing more than to feel him more, feel his skin against hers. If this was her chance, she will try to use this forced mishap and convey her desire, her need for him. Blessing Jenny and her sly way of dealing with things, he tasted like mint tea blended with a dash of sage, fresh and seductive. She shivered, unable to contain the small sound of pleasure when his tongue moved first shyly then pushed into her mouth with fiery force, and his hands bite into the exposed flesh of her back, radiating heat.

“ _Did she just moan?_ ”  wondered, putting all his desire, all his need into the kiss, crushing her lips with his. Her hands abandoned his shoulders; one was firmly entangled in his hair and other caressed side of his face. Imprinting his fingers in her skin, soft silkiness of her back, deepening the kiss.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~ 

Jenny and George giggled, looking at them from one corner. Melody stopped playing for some time now, but a couple in question was still in the firm and a rather passionate embrace.

\- Who would have known that professor still has a spark? –

\- He does have an “umpf”.  They do fit together somehow. –

\- Now that you mentioned it… -  agreed George.

\- Is that Hermione snogging with old dungeon bath? Ewwww! – Ron’s voice joined the conversation – Someone should rescue her. –

\- Not that they have much choice. – winked George pointing at mistletoe above their heads

\- And who is going to “rescue” her – you? I don’t think she needs rescuing at all. – Jenny narrowed her eyes at Ron

\- Are you serious? He’s a git and twice her age. –

\- Unlike the lady, the one you took to take a stroll around corridors? –

\- That is different. –

\- How? – she raised her eyebrow – Face it, boy, you don’t have what it takes to win her over. –

\- And who does? –

\- Apparently him. -   

\- Ewwwwwww. –

\- He has enough IQ to keep her interested, and apparently enough skill to make her look and react like that. –

\- He is groping her. –

\- Yes, and she is caressing him and playing with his hair in the attempt of escape. – she eyed Ron – She’s done everything but jumps on him. –

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Suddenly, he became aware of the silence. Blood that hummed in his ears changed the rut, flowing downwards. Panic hit him with the feel of steering in his pants. Abruptly, he separated himself from her when more blood travelled into the most undesired area. She looked at him with fogged eyes, the deep fire burned beneath dazzled mist. Clearing his throat he squeezed one gravely  

\- Pardon me… -

Turning on the heel and rushing across the room, forcing guests to scramble out of his way.  “ _Potion didn’t work! This is dangerous, so dangerous._ ” screamed his mind. Storming into a toilet, he warded the boot against sound. Everything that this kiss did to him, all chemically muzzled need, crashed on him with force.

He lowered his pants and grabbed painfully erected shaft, hard as steel. Leaning with another hand against the wall for support, he moved his hand fast, squeezing tightly, thrusting into the fist. Not even trying to suppress the groans. The taste of Champagne and strawberries dominating his senses… her taste, drawing him insane as he licked his lips over and over. There were no gentle images, no imagination, and no slow build up; this was pure, undiluted, raw need. It didn’t take long for him to release high pitch moan, one that could put any howling dog at shame, as his body convulsed in a series of jerks. Seed flying out of him in strong, almost violent streams, propelled by the depth of his passion.

Leaning heavily on the wall, waiting for the heart to stop pumping and breath to even out, shaking. With a growl, finally, he reached for his wand to clean the mess and sort himself out to a presentable state. “ _This is ridiculous. I am not a teenage boy; I should be able to control my own reactions. Am I doomed to wank off myself to oblivion in every damn toilet in this blasted building?_ ” fumed washing his hands and face, before storming to collect his cloak and apparating to Hogwarts gates.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Hermione left standing, staring at empty space that he occupied just a few moments ago, trying to gain control over her body railing against sudden separation. Jenny approached her

\- Are you ok? –

\- No. we have to go. Now! –

\- What’s going on? –

\- I need to go home. – she nearly whined

\- Herm, what is going on? – slight panic in her friend's voice snapped her from throws of passion

\- I need a dry pair of underwear. No, I need your gift…now!...before I explode in front of everyone. -  

\- All right, we’re going. So, how was it? –

\- Heavenly. – she breathed rushing to take their cloaks and go home, she needed to turn on vibrating piece of silicone and ram it hard inside her until she screams his name in release…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Could I Have This Kiss Forever" – Enrique Iglesias & Whitney Houston
> 
> Over and over I look in your eyes  
> you are all I desire  
> you have captured me  
> I want to hold you  
> I want to be close to you  
> I never want to let go  
> I wish that this night would never end  
> I need to know 
> 
> Could I hold you for for a lifetime  
> Could I look into your eyes  
> Could I have this night to share this night together  
> Could I hold you close beside me  
> Could I hold you for all time  
> Could I could I have this kiss forever  
> Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever
> 
> Over and over I've dreamed of this night  
> Now you're here by my side  
> You are next to me  
> I want to hold you and touch you taste you  
> And make you want no one but me  
> I wish that this kiss could never end  
> oh baby please
> 
> Could I hold you for a lifetime  
> Could I look into your eyes  
> Could I have this night to share this night together  
> Could I hold you close beside me  
> Could I hold you for all time  
> Could I could I have this kiss forever  
> Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever
> 
> I don't want any night to go by  
> Without you by my side  
> I just want all my days  
> Spent being next to you  
> Lived for just loving you  
> And baby, oh by the way
> 
> Could I hold you for a lifetime  
> Could I look into your eyes  
> Could I have this night to share this night together  
> Could I hold you close beside me  
> Could I hold you for all time  
> Could I have this kiss forever  
> Could I could I have this kiss forever, forever


	8. I Want To Know What Love Is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus is lost after the kiss at the Ministry Ball, he tries to deal with his own feelings, meddling of others and/or to run away... but, will he succeed?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I''m back to inner musing in this chapters, I did try to throw in a bit of humour (I'm not very good with that one tho) ;)

Ten days after he reached his decision… Three days after that kiss on the Ministry Ball… Eight different newspapers and more than dozen photographs in them (how did they manage to take pictures from all those angles, with what and how he didn’t notice it was beyond him.  And yes, he cut them all out, for safekeeping, even if he cursed out loud.) …Countless hours of thinking and rethinking of that night, self-doubt (“ _ Did she really moan? _ ”). The last, rather tasteless articles in once prestigious daily paper lead him to be where he was now, in front of the Gargoyle.  

\- Cat whiskers. – growled

\- You are sight for sore eyes, long time no see. – rumbled Gargoyle good-naturally 

\- Open the bloody door. – hissed

\- Testy. –

\- You may choose to open the door or to be reduced to the pile of rubble, take your choice.  **Cat whiskers** . –

\- All right, all right… - Gargoyle rolled, presenting the spiral staircase and he quickly entered it, not pausing to knock on the door, barging into the Headmistress' office. She jumped a little, startled by his sudden appearance.

\- Severus! What brings you here? –

\- Minerva, we need to talk. –

\- A…All right, give me just a few minutes to finish something. – she rose from the table heading to the door – Talk to Albus, he keeps complaining how you never visit him anymore. –

With those words she left him, he paced in front of the fireplace, contemplating on the best way to approach Minerva with the idea he had.

\- Severus, my boy! It is nice to see you. –

\- Albus. –

\- How are things going my boy? –

\- Fine, everything is …fine. – word “fine” sounded strange on his tongue like it didn’t belong there. He wasn’t sure if the word didn’t belong to him or to his situation. By his opinion, nothing, not one single thing was “fine” it was quite the opposite, but letting Albus on it was far to …inconvenient. Dead or alive, Albus had a knack for meddling into people's lives, his in particular. This…this mess…he was in…he wanted Albus and his meddling ways as far as possible. A short pang of dull pain hit him beneath rib-cage, for most of his life, Albus was the only person he could confide or seek advice. When he killed Albus (no, he won’t allow himself to forget that “small” detail, mercy kill or not), only then he realized how truly alone he was.   

\- Are you sure, Severus? You are lost in thoughts. –

\- Thinking, Albus is something we, who still have the ability to draw air into the lungs, do. –

\- Ah! –

\- What’s that supposed to mean? –

\- Nothing. Ah is sometimes just ah. –

\- Not in your case, never in your case. –

\- You are upset. –

\- Bloody right I’m upset. Trust those dunderheads to cause you trouble even  **after** you no longer teach them. I shouldn’t chop off his ear; I should have chopped off his head instead. –

\- They pulled a little prank, nothing to be so upset about. -  

\- Nothing to be upset about? –

\- It couldn’t be that dreadful kissing the girl! -  

\- I  **was** her teacher Albus. I  **was** her Potions Master and she still seeks my advice. Not to mention that I’m twice her age. –

\- Almost twice her age, but not quite. –

\- Albus, - he picked up the newspapers neatly folded on the desk and waved them towards portrait – I look like a cradle robber on this photo! I still have a reputation as a teacher to uphold. –

\- I wager that your reputation is safe. And Miss Granger hardly can be placed in a cradle, especially in that dress. Let me ask you, Severus, what is more, upsetting to you, the fact that they pulled the prank on you or that you, perhaps … liked that kiss? –

\- Albus! – he growled threateningly

\- For a long time now, I am convinced that you and Miss Granger are befitting match, despite the age difference. -

\- Honestly Albus! – he slammed the papers back on the table. Minerva choose that moment to return

\- You said you want to talk to him Albus, not to upset him. –

\- He was already upset Minnie. –

\- All right, stop aggravating him now. Let me talk to Severus alone, and don’t call me Minnie!. – Albus just smiled and walked outside the frame

\- Old meddler. – Severus growled

\- He means well Severus. –

\- May I remind you that I felt his well-wishing on my skin more than once? –

\- No need. Now sit down and tell me what’s bothering you, we will solve the problem together. -     

\- The problem, Minerva, sitting on your desk. – he grabbed the paper and hurled it into the burning heart

\- That’s enough Severus! –

\- If you liked that piece of fiction so much I’ll give you my copy. – he snarled at her

\- I couldn't care less about the paper, but before you grab and burn something of an importance, calm down. What do you need? –

He blinked at her “ _ I need her! I need to be dead. I need you to rip my heart and my soul out of me! _ ” he blinked again.  

\- I know I promised you that I will stay at school over the holidays, but… if there is any possibility for me…-

\- As I recall I told you that you are under no obligation to be here during the holiday break. –

\- Yes, yes you did. And I’m calling you upon those words now…I… I have to…go. –

\- Go where? Has something happened? –

\- No, nothing of the sorts. –

\- All right, what did you have in mind? If need arises and we should contact, you. –

\- I don’t know. – sighed – I’ll let you know when I decide on location. –

\- For how long? –

\- I will return before term starts. -

\- In that case, I have proposition. Now, no complaining, hear me out first. Before you barged in I was wrecking my brain whom to send on the conference in Spain. We just need representative there, no lectures and no negotiations. Professor Reilly supposed to go, but something private came up and he backed down at the last minute. And with holidays, there are no willing candidates. If you feel that you are up to it… -

\- … –

\- You just need to show up there, maybe sit one or two lectures, but for the rest of the time you are free to do as you please. There is just one thing. – she hiccuped and he wondered what was she trying to hide – The hotel is held by wizards, but it is a muggle establishment. Considering all…our school opted for “muggle means”. –

\- What is that? –

\- Ah nothing much, you would be traveling muggle way. They do have port key for emergency travel but… Would you be interested? –

\- Yes. I can go there, provided that you do not expect of me… -

\- No, nothing of the sort. Thank you, Severus, you are doing this school a huge favor.  Now, go down and get ready, your plain leaves in ten hours. –

\- Plain, you meant plane as airplane? –

\- Yes. Did you ever use it? –

\- Not since…ever, actually. –

\- I hear it is quite the experience.  –  she smiled – Severus… I would think you’d like to know…I reprimanded George and Miss Jenny for pulling that prank on you two. –

\- Minerva, just leave it, unless of course you have something to…reproach. In that case I am obliged to listen, she is, after all, one of your cubs. –

\- Nonsense Severus! She is very dear to me, true, but Miss Granger is a grown woman, capable of making her own decisions, and I for one won’t meddle where I do not belong. Do you really see me as some old spinster who frown on what transpired at the Ball, prank or not? – her voice risen in a unpleasant annoyed pitch

\- I had no intention to insult you Minerva. -  

\- Then I suggest that you choose your words carefully. Severus, I consider you my friend. I’ve known you for the big part of yours and my life. And, what I’m going to say I’m saying not as a former teacher, or colleague, or now your employer but as a friend. On those pictures, …I see two young people who are very suited for each other, and who can be so much more, given the chance. Think about it. Go now. -  

He wanted to argue but instead just nodded and left to his quarters, wondering if those two conspired to wreck his already shaken resolve. Crouching next to the box on the bottom of his dresser, full of neatly stacked muggle clothes he mulled on Minerva words. Holding a white jumper, almost confused where did the article in that color came from (he was sure he didn’t buy it).  Smile graced his face, Minerva; she gifted him that jumper for his birthday that same year, now it seemed like a lifetime ago..  

She called him young, but he felt old, at least 200 years old Could he be so selfish, to even try to impose on her? Maybe he did stand a chance, at least a little one.  He shook his head. Even so…that was a dangerous path to follow… after all, he’s been through…was he really ready? Could he allow himself to get…there…again? Could he allow himself to … feel? Now when he finally had peace, when he could finally live the rest of his days without a struggle, without problems? He was ready to live alone, in seclusion, to dedicate his life to teaching and research. Now that he finally made peace with…Lily at least, if not with his past mistakes.   

He closed his eyes. “ _ Question is can I let myself to…love again, to hope…knowing…? _ ” he sighed. The memory of her lips pressed against his send a series of small electric shocks down his spine. Was he really ready to let himself be used again, even for a small portion of time, just to…experience love, the way it supposed to be? To …experience her? Her body, so perfectly fitting against his was still vivid in his memory, her taste on his lips so inviting.

“ _ Just admit it, you coward. You  _ **_are_ ** _ … _ **_in love_ ** _. Now, what are you going to do?”  _ with a renewed vigour he continued to pack. For once in his life he would do the smart thing, he would do what he supposed to do – let go and run. Runaway, build up his walls and stay behind them when he returns.  

She was just too young, too pure. Sure, she had scars, everybody did after the war. She could never reciprocate, not truly. The best he could hope for was a passing fling, to be entertainment for a brief period of time. If he indulges, could he survive...could he endure yet again to see the woman he loved… walking away… Sighing a deep sigh, he relieved that kiss, over and over again. Every sigh, small moan, feel of her skin under his fingers, the softness of her body, how she pressed next to him. The vision of red danced in front his eyes.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Dressed in a pair of faded black jeans and black jumper with a trench coat, he felt odd. Somebody bumped into him and he hissed in aggravation.

\- Can you watch where you are going? –

\- I’m so sorry… Master Snape! – Turning around he tried not to choke. The very person he was trying to run away from was standing in front of him. Her hair fizzed in the lovely disarray of untamable curls. Her eyes wide open staring at him surprised and happily shining.   

\- What are you doing here Miss Granger? –

\- Waiting to board a plane. You wear muggle clothes! –

\- How astute Miss Granger. –

\- They befit you, you look great in muggle clothes! So, why are you here? –

\- Same as you, travelling. –

\- Oh! That’s great! Where are, you going if you don’t mind me asking? Why do you travel muggle way? –

\- I do, that is none of your business Miss Granger. – he clipped, she looked disappointed at his brush off, and his chest constricted “ _ Coward, idiot, spineless wimp! _ ” – I am going to the conference. –  

\- Oh, me too! Are you holding a lecture there? –

\- No, I’m representing Hogwarts on some conference in Spain….-

\- Master Snape! We are going to the same one! I am presenting first part of our research project –

\- That is  **your** project Miss Granger, I participated in the official capacity awarded to your assistance by the Ministry. -

\- Nevertheless, you helped a lot and credits are in due. - she did everything but squealed, her curls bounced happily – Where are you sitting. –

\- I am not quite sure yet; I didn’t have time to look at my ticket. – frowned not sure if he uses correct phrases, pulling out his plane ticket. She plucked it out of his hand and study it briefly with frown

\- You have economy class. –

\- I fail to see… -

\- But I’m presenting the project you assisted on, basically, you are on the same project so we can exchange your ticket for the first class. –

\- There is no need for that Miss Granger. –

\- But you could sit next to me. – she exclaimed and his insides dropped down. He studied her face, she was like she always was. No traces of discomfort or embarrassment, apparently she was not hunted by that kiss like he was.    

\- That is not necessary… -

\- But… -

\- I thank you, Miss Granger, for your kind offer, but there is no need for that. – he cut her off rudely – This is fairly short flight and I do not have the desire to spend a good portion of it getting acquainted with plane’s toilet. – “ _ Stop talking, just turn around and walk away! Now! Before you say something, you will regret. _ ” words poured out of him and for some reason he was unable to stop them – Now if you will excuse me… -  

She gawked at him seemingly stunned with his statement. Her mouth fell open, closed, then opened again and closed again, until her jaw gave up and slacked, leaving her looking at him blinking with her mouth agape.  

\- Close your mouth, Miss Granger, unless you have the desire to catch flies. –

With that he turned on his heel and left, leaving her to ponder on the correlation between switching from economy to first class, shortness of flight and perceived time spent in plane’s toilet. Smart as she was, Severus was certain that solution to that particular brain teaser will elude her. On the other hand, cauldron just blew up in his face. Now, he had to figure out how to evade her for the next five days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Want To Know What Love Is - Foreigner
> 
> I gotta take a little time  
> A little time to think things over  
> I better read between the lines  
> In case I need it when I'm older
> 
> Now this mountain I must climb  
> Feels like a world upon my shoulders  
> I through the clouds I see love shine  
> It keeps me warm as life grows colder
> 
> In my life there's been heartache and pain  
> I don't know if I can face it again  
> Can't stop now, I've traveled so far  
> To change this lonely life
> 
> I wanna know what love is  
> I want you to show me  
> I wanna feel what love is  
> I know you can show me
> 
> I'm gonna take a little time  
> A little time to look around me  
> I've got nowhere left to hide  
> It looks like love has finally found me
> 
> In my life there's been heartache and pain  
> I don't know if I can face it again  
> I can't stop now, I've traveled so far  
> To change this lonely life
> 
> I wanna know what love is  
> I want you to show me  
> I wanna feel what love is  
> I know you can show me
> 
> I wanna know what love is  
> I want you to show me  
> And I wanna feel, I want to feel what love is  
> And I know, I know you can show me
> 
> Let's talk about love  
> I wanna know what love is, the love that you feel inside  
> I want you to show me, and I'm feeling so much love  
> I wanna feel what love is, no, you just cannot hide  
> I know you can show me, yeah
> 
> I wanna know what love is, let's talk about love  
> I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too  
> I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too  
> And I know and I know, I know you can show me  
> Show me love is real, yeah  
> I wanna know what love is...


	9. Wicked Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When escape plan turns to hell...Severus have difficulty to avoid Hermione, especially the way she looks ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter from Sev's POV, but then again, this part is better to experience from his POV than hers.
> 
> I had a fun time writing this chapter and I hope you'll have at least bit of fun reading it. Don't hate me but I do enjoy doing this to him ;)
> 
> Comment your thoughts on what's going to happen next ^_^

\- You knew!!! – Severus was roaring through the floo call

\- Severus, they did not confirm, I did have my suspicions. Why is it so upsetting to you? –

\- I was hoping to run away from headlines, not to cause more of them! –

\- What headlines can you expect? You are there with a wizarding population of the entire world, chances are you will barely have the opportunity to converse. –

\- Do you honestly expect me to consider that reply as valid? She is your star pupil, you know her better than I do! – “ _As if that is the case._ ” – Do you honestly trust she will not attempt to…socialize…with me? All that it takes is one journalist! –

\- I don’t see… -

\- Yes...you don’t, hence lies the problem. May I remind you that I’m still a professor at the school in which **you** are Headmistress. Don’t you mind how the scandal of this proportions may reflect on **your** reputation if you don’t have the inclination to safeguard mine? –

\- Let me worry about school's reputation. Now, how was the plane flight?  - 

\- Fantastic. – he replied politely, allowing sarcasm to drip from every syllable he spoke – My intestines are still plastered to my brain. Shall I go and bring a cup of tea, while we chat, so that I don’t talk on the empty stomach about the…sodding…weather and tea cookies. –

\- You can always shy away from conversing with her **if** you see it as a necessity. -    

\- All right, Minerva, I’ll do my best to attempt and sidestep your lioness… -

\- You are both members of scientific wizarding community Severus. – Minerva’s voice was trembling from anger – You are not only her rotation Master, you were an adviser on the project she presents. No one can say anything that can’t be disputed with those simple facts, even if you are seen together! I suggest you stop ragging and use this time to resolve any issues you have! As I told you, I won’t force you to attend their lectures, moreover, it is advisable that you don’t. Our scientific community is small as it is, with your knowledge…well, we don’t need young scientists scarred for life with only two or three of your remarks. –

\- Then why did you sent me here? –

\- Go and see the city. Barcelona is a wonderful town. Go sightseeing, enjoy the sea air. I admit, winter is not the best time to visit but it still has a lot to offer. –

\- I’ll do my best to oblige Minerva. Consider this trip my **last** **favour** to you or school. –

\- Severus…-

Fuming he cancelled the floo call. He was a drowning man, and instead of the lifesaver, they tossed him an anchor. Granted that Minerva couldn’t even begin to fantom what was the cause of his anger, regardless, that didn't give her the right to manipulate him as she did. He was entitled to all facts before accepting this… and yet, Minerva was the least of his problems. 

They all did their best to literally push the young woman next to him, undoubtedly counting on his strength to maintain their relationship on polite, professional level. The problem was…he had no strength…not anymore. Not after… He nearly died for them once already, did they desired for him to die once more? Maybe with more success this time? Didn’t they understand that Severus Snape is just a man? Plain, fallible, lonely man with needs and desires like rest of them.

Pacing angrily back and forth, he had no desire to go down and face his colleagues, doubting that he would be able to swallow a bite, but growling stomach proved him otherwise. Glancing at the Muggle clock, still disoriented slightly with the time difference, he skipped the first meal of the day and ate almost nothing for lunch. Dinner was served for another 2 hours in the hotel restaurant. If he goes there before closing time, he might just manage not to see her.

He deemed himself incapable of developing any kind of sentimental feelings, little less falling in love, but there he was. She was absolute perfection! And the more he knew her, the more she leached onto his heart. Smart, quick to ask and answer, so naïve, so pure. Like a ray of sunshine after darkness, he was lived in for decades. Her genuine gentleness was captivating. He had to protect her, protect her future, even at the price of himself.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

It was quarter till nine when he ventured into the almost empty dining room, filling his plate he chose the most secluded table in the darkest corner he could find. Savoring the flavour of rigatoni with shrimp, calamari and basil he closed his eyes, pondering on the list of lectures for tomorrow. Even if he didn’t originally plan to listen any of it, few titles caught his attention. Nearly dropping off his fork at the sound of her voice

\- Good evening, Master Snape, may I join you? – not waiting for a reply she placed her plate across his and sat down

\- By all means, Miss Granger, feel free, next time you don’t even have to ask. – he intoned dryly, eyes glued to his plate

\- Oh, thank you, Master Snape! – she cried happily and he sharply raised his head

“ _Mistake, big mistake._ ” – That is the unusual attire for conference Miss Granger, I do hope that you have something less…reviling for your presentation. – he shoved a full fork in his mouth just so he could have an excuse to swallow.

There she was, self-invited, sitting across him in almost no clothes. Her blouse was thin, almost transparent. Hugging her back, but exposing her bare, perfect, shoulders and more than generous portion of her cleavage. Hair tamed into a loose bun with mischievous tendrils drawing attention to her long neck.

\- What? Oh, this? Few of us are going to the nightclub later, I am dressed for the occasion. –

\- Mhm. – was all he could muster

\- You disapprove? –

\- Of what? – with the religious dedication he paid attention to his plate, his heart fighting against every bite he took, as the food went down his heart was steadily advancing up

\- Of this outfit. – she sounded disappointed

\- Miss Granger, you are your own person, my approval or disapproval of your look is of no consequence. –

\- True. I didn’t see you today, did you enjoy the city? –

\- I am afraid that plane ride and change of bed did not agree with my old age, I spent my day in the room. –

\- Master Snape, you are not old, not by a muggle and certainly not by wizarding standards. I was just about to ask you to join us. –

\- Join you? –

\- Yes, on our visit to the club. – he raised his eyes “ _Is she insane?_ ” he certainly was if he allowed himself to forget and look at her. His eyes were gliding towards the path between the swell of her breasts, pressed with a black lace. And the only reason he knew it is a black lace because the blasted piece of torturing lace was peeking through the edges of her blouse, pressing the soft, jittery, globes close and up. He took a swing of…prune juice?

\- Oh, I’m sorry, that’s my glass Master. –

\- Thank you, for your generous invitation but I must decline. –

\- Lykke will be disappointed. She asked me about you, she seen us talking at the airport and asked me about “handsome, dark man” from the airport. I think she has a thing for you. - 

\- Mhm. – he mumbled, frowning – Miss Granger can I … ask you something? –

\- Yes! – she leaned towards him over the table, eyes full of expectation, pushing her cleavage out of the skimpy material further. Black spots danced in front of his eyes as he grabbed his glass and almost downed it

\- First of all, may I ask that in the future you do not indulge in matchmaking concerning my person. – 

\- I apologize, Master, I never … -

\- I believe I was talking Miss Granger. – he cut her off – Second, as honorary as the title is, may I ask you to refrain yourself from using it, at least while we are in the muggle world? –

\- Why? – she blinked, doe-like eyes utterly confused

\- Unlike in the wizarding society, Miss Granger, muggles may misinterpret its meaning, and I am more than willing to avoid any misconceptions about the nature of our relationship. –

\- I don’t… - she started and he tilted his head

\- Honestly, Miss Granger, you are after all muggleborn, are you not? –

\- Yes, but what that’s got to do with… - she stopped midsentence, he could see the cogs in her head turning – Ou! Ooooooooooooou! –

\- Ou, indeed. –

\- How I am gonna call you then. –

\- Professor will suffice. – he replied dryly, returning to his meal. Her eyes drilled the hole in his face much the same way that her cleavage drilled the hole in his stomach.

\- Professor…, may I ask you something. – he motioned her to continue, seemingly dedicated to his food – If I might be so bold to ask… I know is none of my business…but, since you already shared information…well…you see, I’m trying to understand…about what you said at the airport…about… -

“ _You landed yourself in this mess, now suffer the consequences._ ” – About the toilet? – asked, doing his best to sound nonchalant, like it is highly uninteresting and boring topic. She nodded. He should’ve known she was not one to let go

\- You are correct Miss Granger, it is none of your business. But, I will indulge you, if nothing than to avoid being followed by you in order to solve the mystery. As it turns, of late, I developed…condition…as side effect forced me, more times than I am willing to admit, to utilize public toilets. –

\- Professor! I…I…Did you…is there anything Poppy or healers from St. Mungo’s can do? –

\- I am afraid Poppy or any healer, for that matter, can’t help me. –

\- Are you sure? –

\- Quite sure. –

\- Is…is it…from the bite? Is there anyone who can help? –

\- No, Miss Granger, it is not the bite. The problem will disappear the same way it appeared. –

\- If I can help in any way… - her eyes looked scared, was she scared of him?

“ _You are the only one who can, unfortunately._ ” moaned his mind, how did he manage to tangle up in this conversation, by his own stupidity, that’s how “ _How I managed to survive two wars impersonating double spy with these verbal skills is beyond me_.” feeling like he is fumbling over his own words, struggling with every sentence.

\- There is no need to concern yourself with it. I will survive Miss Granger, I am taking all necessary precautions… - “ _Not that I'm succeeding in them, as you are sitting at my table half naked._ ”

\- Is there anything I can do? –

“ _Merlin, she is like a dog with a bone.”_ \- As a matter of fact, there is. – she looked at him full of hope “ _Would you fuck with me?_ ” – Stop. Talking. About. It. –

\- Oh! Yes, yes of course. I apologize. How inconsiderate of me. – she blushed, and he beat down the urge to run his fingers over flushed cheeks – It is time to meet with the others, are you sure you don’t want to join? You don’t even have to change. –

\- I am sure. I’ll stay here for a bit longer, indulge in a glass of wine and study the schedule for lectures. – he tapped his finger on a pile of printed material he took with him.

\- Well then, thank you for the company and conversation, Professor. –

\- You are most welcome Miss Granger. Have a nice night. –

She stood up and his vision blurred, he honestly prayed that he does not look at her cross-eyed. The scanty blouse was accompanied with no more than a wider belt impersonating skirt, revealing full length of her legs. She walked towards the exit, slightly swaying her hips, balancing on 12-inch heels.

He could imagine her in his bed, wearing nothing more than that black lace and those heels, he probably wouldn’t mind feeling a stab of those heels in his lower back as he… “ _Stop it, you are already signed on for staying here more than a bit longer as it is. Why didn't I bring the potion with me?_ ” he knew the answer, he never expected her to be here. But she was, concerned about his health and half naked.

He entertained idea about following her, unnoticed, to the club, defend her from unwanted suitors if the need arises. Then again, he might just end up defending her against **all** suitors or fucking her against some wall. Who would be able to defend her against him? He shook his head “ _I better go into the room and…polish my wand…is that the term kids use these days?_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wicked Game – Chris Isaak
> 
> The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.  
> It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.  
> I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you.  
> And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you.
> 
> No, I don't want to fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> No, I don't want to fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> With you, with you (this girl is only gonna break your heart)
> 
> What a wicked game you play to make me feel this way.  
> What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.  
> What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.  
> What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you
> 
> And I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> No, I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> With you.
> 
> The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.  
> It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.  
> I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.  
> And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you,
> 
> No, I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> No, I wanna fall in love (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> With you (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> With you (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> No, I... (this girl is only gonna break your heart)  
> (this girl is only gonna break your heart)
> 
> Nobody loves no one.


	10. Bette Davis Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First four days of the conference in Spain...Hermione is determent to make her move...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of Hermione's POV, I discovered that it is very hard for me to write from female pov...odd :/ 
> 
> Anw, hold on,..soon (not in this chapter tho but soon) things are going to...heat up ;)

Hermione had a feeling that every nerve in her body is quivering. Standing on the crowded airport she watched at Snape’s back. This was her chance, golden opportunity. In Barcelona, there won’t be familiar faces, journalists, obstacles…well all other obstacles save from him. But if she could judge by that one kiss they shared, with proper preparation, she had decent chance to succeed.

“ _That kiss_.” she mussed entering the plane “ _Gods, he knows how to make you weak in the knees, hell, to make my underwear soaking wet, with just one kiss._ ” What he could do if he put an effort and little more action…she wasn’t very good at seduction, it is useless skill when boys don’t notice you, but she watched Jenny, she knew every trick in Jenny’s repertoire. First thing tomorrow, she must go to shopping for new clothes, what she had with her was too...prudish.

\- Who was that? – English with strong accent snapped her of her musings, she looked at the blond girl next to her 

\- Who was what? –

\- The dark-haired hunk. –

\- Oh, that’s Master Snape, my old Potions Professor and rotation Master. – 

 - Yum. –

\- Back off Lykke, he’s…mine. –

\- Ohhhhhhh, so that’s your mystery man. –

\- Mhm. I had no idea he will attend also. –

\- So, what are you going to do? – Hermione turned to Swedish girl and grinned

\- WE are going shopping tomorrow. –

\- I like the sound of that. –

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Hermione returned to hotel, hands full of bags, she must send her old clothes home by floo. Every single piece she bought emphasized all her attributes; some articles were downright provocative. Stalking through the hotel, trying to get a glimpse of him, Hermione grounded her molars in frustration. Finally, Lykke forced her to dress up for going to the club. They were all standing in the hallway when she noticed him heading to the dining hall. Finding fast excuse not to go, she followed him. Sadly, in all the years she knew him, reading him was still a struggle, he did look a bit paler and worse for the wear, but she could not put the finger what cause it.

Besides, she had to focus hard not to slip her gaze at his lips. Every time she remembered the kiss, electric shocks went down her spine and straight between her legs. Feigning nonchalance she invited herself as his company for the dinner taking care to show as much of her decollete as she could without being obvious. Of course, she couldn’t be sure, but at one point it seemed to her that his eyes are gliding towards her cleavage. But that was a brief moment, too brief for her to be certain it was not just a product of her imagination.    

Hermione returned to the room mulling on last part of their conversation. Was he completely healed from the attack? Did poison leave some damage? Poppy would know, but knowing Poppy, she wouldn’t discuss it, not even to Minerva without him permitting it. Snape wasn’t the type to complain or allow anyone notice any sign of weakness. No, she will have to discover it on her own.

On the other hand, his disapproval of her outfit gave her some glimmer of hope. Dislike meant he did notice it, it also meant he was not absolutely oblivious to her looks. That was the start. Grinning like a cat that ate the canary she prepared for bed, her hunt starts tomorrow.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Moss green wool dress fitted her like a glove, with long sleeves and turtleneck, falling just beneath the knees, it was covering her completely and exposing all of her at the same time. For the most part of the day, he was absent from lectures and presentations “ _Probably nothing spiked his fancy today._ ” and she couldn’t blame him, everything that day was on the beginners level.

This was their second day in Spain and the first day of the conference. Her presentation was scheduled for the last day. The plan was quite simple… It was dinner time, and he was sitting at the same table, isolated somewhat from the rest of the attendants. She walked across the dining hall, praying not to trip on her feet clad in knee high boots with 6-inch heels, seating herself at his table. He raised his eyes in confusion

\- I did receive an invitation from you to join you freely Professor. – smiled at him

\- Hmmmm, yes, I suppose so. –

\- How was your day? –

\- Mind numbing, I was on three lectures and all were on the low level of presentation. Sole topic’s, albeit interesting, nothing new was presented. Quite disappointing. –

\- I agree. – sighed, he was dedicated to his plate again – Professor, can I bother you for a consult? –

\- I am your official adviser Miss Granger. – his voice sounded bit rough, and she started to worry

\- Would you mind, after dinner, to accompany me to my room and look over data I’m preparing for a presentation? I am dissatisfied with the way I explained some fact’s, the correct way to lay them out eludes me. I need to…simplify them. –

\- After dinner. – he was staring at her for long, long minute before he nodded

In her room, she offered him a chair across king size bed, spreading papers and charts on the table. She barely sat down, opting to lean on the table next to him, nearly touching his shoulder, pointing out rows of numbers, desperately trying to look emerged in work while exposing a curve of her back and bum to his view. A good few hours later, Hermione huffed at the closed door. She had notes for rearranging more than a half of her presentation, her favourite quill was all chewed up and … nothing.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Ok, so the green dress didn’t work. For the second day of lectures, she chose black wool skirt just above her knees, fluffy blood red jumper that fitted her perfectly and again same knee-high boots. Half the day into the lectures and she was craning her neck left and right, but he was nowhere to be found. Around the lunchtime, she spotted him entering the hotel.

\- Professor! You skipped the morning presentations. –

\- Not all of them Miss Granger, but I do have a sense of self-preservation and desire not to die from pure boredom. –

\- You visited Johan’s lecture on Dark Arts. – she grinned – Then you must have escaped early, half of the public was snoring at the end. Please, join me for a cup of coffee, if I want to survive the day I need it. –

Not giving him a chance to refuse, she grabbed him by the hand and pulled him towards the café in the main hotel hall, steering them towards the table in the corner with only one cushioned two-seater behind it. He followed her reluctantly, folding neatly his trench coat. Beneath it he had a pair of relatively new black jeans and soft black shirt, he sat stiffly on one end, placing three small parcels on the table. She ordered coffee for two of them. 

\- What do you have here? – she eyed transparent wrapping – Oh! Brujas de la Suerte! You found her! –

\- Beg your pardon? –

\- I was looking for the girl that sells them, they told me she is working but I never manage to get to her boot in right time. I wanted to buy one! -  

\- Feel free to choose one. The girl was the only one working on the desolate street, and she was closing, I took pity on her and took these. –

\- What luck did you aim for? –

\- Luck? Miss Granger, I do not follow Muggle superstition, I just picked three pendants that caught my eye. – he picked up fiery red pendant – This one has your house colours. –

\- I don’t need love Professor. – she giggled – I think I fancy this one. – picking up black Bruja – Would you mind putting it around my neck? – His fingers trembled slightly as he hooked the clip around her neck, but the clasp was tiny in his long fingers and she wasn’t sure if he didn’t just struggle with it. – Which one did you pick up for you? –

\- Shiny trinkets are for females, Miss Granger. –

\- Nonsense, Bruja's are for everyone! Here, a red one, for love. Let me put it around your neck. – before he managed to react she took red witch and encircled him in a loose embrace to put it around his neck – There, she might bring you luck. –

\- Miss Granger, I am certain I told you to stop playing matchmaker for me. –

\- You did, and I’m not. The witch will attract love on its own. That is if you don’t mind wearing my house colours. –

\- Miss Granger, Gryffindor has no exclusive right on colour red, he merely bears it. – he smirked and her heart speeded up the beats - What is the black one for? –

\- She repels pain and hurt. –

\- Are you hurting Miss Granger? –

\- The war wasn’t so long ago Professor, there are wounds which can heal only with time. Now, thanks to your generosity that time might come little faster. – she fought of the sad smile, her fingers still tingling where she touched his skin – Now you have one left. She reminds me of Minerva. –

\- That is what I thought, maybe I will give it to her. –

\- It is befitting, green is for prosperity and academic achievement. – the red pendant shone like a droplet of blood against his black shirt – Professor, I never thanked you properly. –

\- Whatever for Miss Granger? –

\- For the ointment. – she pulled the sleeve of her jumper exposing pale thing marking on her skin – They healed quite nicely. They are barely visible now, and redness is gone. –

\- The redness was curse Miss Granger; my ointment did not help with that. Once the curse was removed, ointment merely helped with cosmetics. –

\- Thank you anyway. – he just nodded, they both knew he was lying – Professor, may I impose on you this evening some more? I rearranged my presentation but I’m still nervous, - she chewed on her lip, it was imperative that he accept her invitation – and I discovered something else by doing so, I’m quite excited about it! –

He looked at her for, his eyes gliding to the lip between her teeth, finally he nodded and with excuse left without even touching his coffee. That evening left her utterly frustrated, she used the most powerful trick Jenny told her about, and he still left her room, polite and distant as ever. She cried herself to sleep that night, clutching her black Bruja in hand.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

\- Do you know what time it is? – sleepy Jenny’s voice sounded grumpy

\- Half past eight. He’s here, I need help. –

\- Who is where? –

\- HIM! He is here in Spain, in the same hotel, at the same conference. –

\- Oh, and? –

\- And nothing. I used every trick I could think of, the man is a rock! –

\- Did you try… -

\- Last night, he didn’t even flinch. Maybe it has something to do with his condition…-

\- What condition? –

\- I don’t know, something about visiting the toilet often. He says that is not something healers can cure…Jen stop laughing… -

\- Darling, often visits to toilet, for men, can be irregular bowel movement, problem with prostate or bladder all curable up to the point. And… -

\- And? –

\- Well…tur on your brain girl! – her brain rattled while she was mulling on Jenny’s word

\- Nooooo, you don’t think… -

\- I do. –

\- But… -

\- Did you tried to get him drunk? Bit unorthodox but… That man of yours… -

\- Wouldn’t that be counterproductive? –

\- As I was saying before you interrupted me…That man of yours have some mighty breaks, small amount of alcohol may help to loosen them up. Don’t get him wasted, just… relaxed. –

\- All right, thanks. I am desperate, we are here only two more days and one night and if I miss my chance… -

\- He’s there, he just needs a nudge. Can I get back to sleep now? –

\- Thank you, Jen, I’ll see you upon my return. –

Hanging up the phone she looked at her reflection in the mirror “ _So tonight…_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh! I changed meanings for Brujas de al suerte to fit the story ;)
> 
> Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Cranes
> 
> Her hair is Harlow gold  
> Her lips sweet surprise  
> Her hands are never cold  
> She's got Bette Davis eyes  
> She'll turn the music on you  
> You won't have to think twice  
> She's pure as New York snow  
> She got Bette Davis eyes
> 
> And she'll tease you  
> She'll unease you  
> All the better just to please you  
> She's precocious, and she knows just  
> What it takes to make a pro blush  
> She got Greta Garbo's standoff sighs  
> She's got Bette Davis eyes
> 
> She'll let you take her home  
> It whets her appetite  
> She'll lay you on the throne  
> She got Bette Davis eyes  
> She'll take a tumble on you  
> Roll you like you were dice  
> Until you come out blue  
> She's got Bette Davis eyes
> 
> She'll expose you, when she snows you  
> Off your feet with the crumbs she throws you  
> She's ferocious, and she knows just  
> What it takes to make a pro blush  
> All the boys think she's a spy  
> She's got Bette Davis eyes
> 
> And she'll tease you  
> She'll unease you  
> All the better just to please you  
> She's precocious, and she knows just  
> What it takes to make a pro blush  
> All the boys think she's a spy  
> She's got Bette Davis eyes
> 
> She'll tease you  
> She'll unease you  
> Just to please you  
> She's got Bette Davis eyes  
> She'll expose you  
> When she snows you  
> She knows you  
> She's got Bette Davis eyes


	11. Poison

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sharing his visit to Spain with Hermione made Severus wishing for... Inquisition... to rescue him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's probably isn't a new day on the page, but it is 2:15 AM here, and I have busy day tomorrow...so I'm posting this chapter now. 
> 
> I do hope you gonna like it even if I still torture poor Sev - I promise not for long ;)

Deliberately being late on the breakfast and the first lecture, he managed to sit through three lectures, wondering if any of those so-called scientists would get a passing grade at Hogwarts. These were not scientific breakthroughs these were poorly written second-year essays. Slipping off to an early lunch he decided to listen to Minerva’s advice and venture into the exploration of the city, quite enjoying the city’s architecture and plenitude of odd buildings. Managing, at least briefly, to forget his predicament, Severus had a surprisingly nice day which was an oddity on its own. 

Still, in a good mood, he went to the dinner, choosing the same table as last night. Nice day swiftly turn to its descending path as familiar voice greeted him happily. She invited herself to be at his table. The audacity of the girl (!), she had the nerve to remind him that **he** gave her permission (!!!). Does she know to differentiate between invitation and sarcasm? At least she was dressed this time. Though the dress didn’t hide much, in fact, it emphasized plenty, but in an elegant and discreet way. Problem was, this dressed up she was even more appealing, reminding him on a precious gift, that should be unwrapped slowly.

She chatted about the day and he entertained himself with imagining how would it be to “unwrap” her. He replied to her questions almost automatically, without any forethought, and manage to land himself in quite an unpleasant situation. “ _Next time listen to her, this is all your fault._ ” He grumbled in his head, standing next to her in the elevator. Her room was on the fourth floor, small dining table and two chairs opposed king size bed with the sheets in the soft lavender shade. Resisting the urge to close his eyes, he focused on the data in front of him.

Is she dead set on torturing him? Does she have a sadistic streak? His right side was tingling from shoulder to the toes in his boots. She is leaning on the table next to him, smelling so temptingly. The arch of her back curving into a firm… ” _Don’t go there, concentrate._ ” She plays with a damn quill, chewing on it. Every single time she moves a hand her breasts sway slightly if he was just a fraction less experienced in controlling his appearances she would figure out that he is helping her with no brain involved in the conversation, all his thoughts and senses battling to break his resolve. “ _Thank you for the war, thank you, Albus, thank you Dark Lord, without your interests to play with my life I couldn’t go through this without making a fool out of myself._ ” He could not wait for them to finish, he nearly bolted out of the room.

Barging into his room, toed the boots of the feet while still on the move, he didn’t make a pause until he reached the shower, hitting the cold handle forcefully. Cold water smashed at him, soaking his clothes. He was standing in his socks, jeans, boxer-shorts and black jumper feeling almost comically idiotic. Slamming the fist with full force at the wall, hissed at the pain, but continued to grind knuckles against the ornamental tiles.

Finally unstrapping his hand from the wall, he watched a thin stream of blood flowing with the water.

\- And I’m back to cold showers, some refuge this turn out to be. – the sound of his own voice startled him. Working as a spy, living the life he did even before, he learned one thing fast – silence is imperative. No matter what is going on, no matter what you do – silence. But ever since…this…this witch…he was anything but silent. And her… anger flared while he was pulling off wet clothes letting it splash on the till floor. Did she even have an idea…? Probably not…       

~ S ~ S ~ S ~ 

Determined not to see her, he was even more late, slipping in the last row, some good fifteen minutes after the lecture started. It didn’t take him long to realize that lecturer was complete idiot “ _Dark Lord at least did us one favour, our first years know more about DADA than he does._ ” With newly gained respect toward the idiots he had to teach, he left the lecture.

Strong wind slammed the waves against the concrete walls of La Rambla del Mar sending a fine spray of seawater into the air. Walking slowly down the promenade he crossed the small square to the broad avenue divided with an island that was famous La Rambla. It was a cold day and small selling booths were deserted.[1] Only one stand was open, a girl not older than 16, selling little glass witches.

-  Buenas días señor. ¿Quieres comprar una Bruja de la suerte?[2] - 

He looked at the girl, she was staring at him without fear, her eyes bright and smiling, even if she shivered against the wind. The girl had black eyes and dark almost black curly hair beneath the wool hat. Closing the eyes for a moment battling the thought before even formed, approached her stand.

\- Do you speak English? –

\- A little. They will bring you luck. Each colour different luck –

He smiled and looked at the plenitude of glass pendants in all colours, glanced at the girl

\- How do I choose? –

\- For you or others? –

\- One for me and few for others. –

\- Pick for you first. – smiled the girl, one fiery red witch caught his eye “ _I might as well get a hat with a sign above it. That would be too much…too much…_ ” finally he picked up one black figurine

\- Ah, protects you good, this one. –

He took red and one green witch, having no idea what to do with them, but he felt good by making a curly black haired girl happy. She slid each ornament on the round strip of leather and packed it separately. Suddenly losing the desire to walk he headed back to the hotel.

The moment he was in the hotel, Granger rounded him, dragging him to the coffee, chatting about lectures. She squealed about the glass witches, and he offered her one. By his opinion, she was deserving so much more than a piece of glass on the leather string, but she was ecstatic, choosing the black Bruja for herself and a red one for him. The irony was not lost on him. Finally, she swindled him into a promise that he will help her that night as well. His gaze constantly sliding towards the lip she chewed, wanting to kiss the molested part more than anything.

“ _I am her adviser, it’s my duty to guide her._ ” Mentally preparing himself for that evening he reminded himself, standing once again next to her in the elevator. For the first part of the evening, they went through her presentation, working diligently. With no small amount of pride, he compared her lecture with what he heard so far, it was far too superior.

\-   You are prepared Miss Granger. Your presentation is the best I’ve heard here so far. You mentioned discovery today… - he finally relaxed, she was looking sinfully in the red jumper and black skirt but dead set on working, sitting across him.

\- Yes! Gods, I almost forgot about that! I organized data the way you advised me and it was there, hidden. I would miss it without your help. – knock echoed through the room and she jumped – This is the desert, I hope you don’t mind I ordered it. They have the best vanilla cream here. – she bounced to the door and returned with a saucer full of bananas cut in half and bowl of yellowish cream. – Look at this… - she showed papers towards him.

Suddenly, he became wary. Something was amiss and he could not put his finger on it. Reading the complex equations and graphs movement caught his eye. She took one-half of the banana and dipped it into the cream. Pretending to be engrossed with data he carefully observed her under the heavy lids and a thick row of eyelashes.

Her pink tongue peaked between parted lips, she licked the dripping cream from the length of the fruit she was holding in her hand. Small meticulous licks that caught every droplet. He crossed his legs, steering, reaching for empty paper and quill as a cover to the movement. Blood whistled in his ears, his eyesight fogged. She dipped fruit into the bowl again “ _Don’t look! Don’t look! Don’t look!_ ” panicked his brain. But his eyes continued to watch every move she made. “ _No, no, no! She won’t…bloody hell!!!_ ”

He had a feeling that entire blood he had in his body pooled below his waistline. The hand scribbled furiously as he fought to maintain normal breathing. Hermione (when did he start calling her by her given name?) licked the banana in one long swipe and sucked the fruit in her mouth with a juicy slurp. She sucked on bloody fruit like her life depends on it. His ears start to burn. Every controlled breath he took choked him. Finally, she released the fruit from her mouth with an audible plop.

\- What do you think? –

“ _I should go before I offer something else for you to suck on instead of banana._ ” – It has the potential. –

\- I wanted to ask you if I widen my research to that as well, would you be interested in joining in. –

“ _If you continue eating that banana…I joined Death Eaters for far less._ ” – Miss Granger, as I already told you… -

\- Professor please, – she looked at him with puppy-like eyes and dipped the fruit into the cream again – think about it. –

\- I will Miss Granger. – he squeezed as she started to suck on cream again, holding his eyes with her bright, slightly pleading gaze. – Well if we are finished… -

\- Oh, but you didn’t try the dessert. – she squeaked, placed her fruit on the small plate and took another dipping it in the cream and offering to him. One droplet started to fall and he placed his hand, instinctively, to protect the papers below.

\- I don’t have much of a sweet tooth Miss Granger… -

\- Your hand! – she picked up his hand and…” _No! Don’t you dare you little…Merlin save me!!!_ ” …she licked the cream from his palm. His insides crumbled, he could feel his painful erection leaking in his pants and desperately tried to bather the feeling

\- Miss Granger, there is an invention called napkin. – “ _Thank you, Salazar_.” His voice sounded mocking

\- It is a shame to waste this cream. – she blinked

\- May I get my hand back and a towel? – “ _Before I explode or rape you?_ ”

\- Sure, I’ll be right back, don’t go anywhere. – she jumped and padded to the toilet

“ _That is definitely not an issue._ ” Keeping a close eye on the toilet door he dipped the hand in his jeans, shifting his erection to more comfortable and hopefully less visible position. She appeared carrying towel, he took the towel, wiping his hands

\- It is late Miss Granger if we are finished here… -

\- Professor…would you….will you…come to listen to my presentation tomorrow? – she took his hand again, holding it for a while in her small palms, her lip was between her teeth. He slowly pulled his hand away

\- It is my duty, Miss Granger. – he stood up and walked to the door - I’ll see you tomorrow, good night Miss Granger. – “ _She is going to put me to my grave._ ”

Running to his room, decided halfway down, that he made a bad judgement call. Walking little less running with the erection of the size and hardness of the beaters bat was a bad, bad idea.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Standing under the shower Severus tried to fight off the sleepiness. He didn’t sleep much that night, and nearly wank off himself raw, wondering what will give up first – his body or his heart. Every time he closed his eyes he saw her full lips sucking and licking bloody fruit, and he imagined how would it be if she did that to him. Her lips parting to…

His member tapped against his thigh and he moaned “ _Merlin, not again! Bloody hell, this is not happening! I am forty, not fifteen. What have I ever done to deserve this?”_ huffed wrapping his hand around overly cheerful organ again “ _At least I advanced to the room, even if it was for one night._ ” This was starting to be tiring not to mention downright embarrassing. He tried not to think, working towards his fifth orgasm in less than ten hours, wondering if this…condition…is going to leave permanent damage.

Still mulling on the possible consequences, he dressed blindly. “ _Salazar, just let me live through the day”_. He was drinking his second coffee when she turned up

-Professor, that colour suits you. –

\- I always wear…oh! – he had a white jumper Minerva gave him – Yes, this was…-

-…birthday present from Minerva. I know, I helped her choose it. – she smiled gently. Spots danced in front of his eyes if he thought that tight dresses and short skirts looked good on her…what she was wearing today was just too…sexy. She had a common pearl white shirt and deep grey skirt, just below her knees with simple and elegant shoes on 6-inch heels. Her hair was in an elegant bun, nested at the nape of her neck.

That day was no escape from her. On her presentation, she gave him a credit, diverting attention to him. During lunch and breaks, she was next to him, he started to dread the evening. Venturing to the toilet to cool down his face, rolling his sleeves and revelling in the feel of cold water, he felt overheated whole day.

\- Wow, I like your ink. – a muggle girl with eccentric hair colour smiled at him. He nodded shortly cursing the muggles and their idea of unisex toilets. – Are you a guest? I think I’ve seen you in the hotel. –

\- Pardon me, Miss. – hissed rolling down the sleeves

\- Hey wait, where can I get one of those, that is really mighty ink work. –

\- You can’t, not anymore. – squeezed, unconsciously grabbing his left forearm.

\- Professor… - Hermione barged into the toilet, tossed a glance to him than to the girl

\- Professor, niceeeee. – girl whistled and he could swear that Hermione growled at her “ _I’m too tired, I’m seeing things_.”

\- Professor, we are waiting for you. – she grabbed his hand and pulled him out, dragging him towards the staircases

\- Miss Granger, where are we going? – she stopped

\- Well, we might still join them, but they decided it will be fun to go to the striptease bar. I am personally not for something like that, and I wager you are not either. However, I have in my room Tequila so good it is to die for if you don’t mind sharing a shot or two with me. –

\- I… - her room sounded inviting considering the option, Tequila was certainly welcomed, but experience from previous nights…he was at the end of his strengths.

\- What can be wrong in that Professor? These were four tiring days; little nightcap won’t harm you. –

“ _The whole bottle won’t harm me._ ” – I suppose it is… - she smiled around her head – Miss Granger, why do we use the stairs? –

\- Yoshi and Babet are stuck in the elevator. –

\- Shouldn’t we inform someone to rescue them? –

\- I don’t think they want to be rescued, they are both here with their teams and share rooms. – she smiled – Honestly, I believe they are “stuck” on purpose. –

Threading behind her, doing his best not to notice the sway of her hips “ _As if that is possible_.” wondered what the hell is wrong with him, why he just can’t say “no” and walk away “ _She is the poison and there is no antidote. Severus, face it, you are a sucker for pain._ ” Like he didn’t know that before…  

 

[1] I don’t really know how LaRambla looks like in the winter time, so this is as well bend it to fit the story.

[2] Good day, Sir. Do you want to buy one Lucky witch? – rough translation, my Spanish is bit rusty so I hope I get the sentence on Spanish right too ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a history with this song, and I'm very fond of it ;)  
> Poison – Alice Cooper
> 
> Your cruel device,  
> Your blood like ice.  
> One look could kill,  
> My pain, your thrill.
> 
> I wanna love you, but I better not touch (don't touch)  
> I wanna hold you, but my senses tell me to stop  
> I wanna kiss you, but I want it too much (too much)  
> I wanna taste you, but your lips are venomous poison
> 
> You're poison runnin through my veins  
> You're poison, I don't wanna break these chains.
> 
> Your mouth, so hot  
> Your web, I'm caught  
> Your skin, so wet  
> Black lace on sweat
> 
> I hear you callin and it's needles and pins (and pins)  
> I wanna hurt you just to hear you screaming my name  
> Don't wanna touch you, but you're under my skin (deep in)  
> I wanna kiss you, but your lips are venomous poison
> 
> You're poison runnin through my veins  
> You're poison, I don't wanna break these chains  
> Poison
> 
> One look (one look), could kill (could kill),  
> My pain, your thrill.
> 
> I wanna love you, but I better not touch (don't touch)  
> I wanna hold you, but my senses tell me to stop  
> I wanna kiss you, but I want it too much (too much)  
> I wanna taste you, but your lips are venomous poison
> 
> You're poison runnin through my veins  
> You're poison, I don't wanna break these chains  
> Poison
> 
> I wanna love you, but I better not touch (don't touch)  
> I wanna hold you, but my senses tell me to stop  
> I wanna kiss you, but I wanna too much (too much)  
> I wanna taste you, but your lips are venomous poison
> 
> Yeah  
> Well I don't wanna break these chains  
> Poison
> 
> Runnin deep inside my veins  
> Burnin deep inside my veins  
> Poison  
> I don't wanna break these chains


	12. (I Just) Died In Your Arms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It finally happens...they did it...and Severus is conflicted...what now...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have an insane amount of work mapped out for me today...and I suppose to have a small number of hours to sleep last night...hahaha...the joke is on me. 
> 
> This chapter (and the song playing on repeat) hopped in my head almost all night, robbing me of my rest. I just had to flush them out of my system. So today you have a double feature (is that correct term?)
> 
> I would greatly appreciate your input on this chapter. This is the first time I've written sex scene and I'm not sure if I manage to do it correctly, so, I'd appreciate all your opinions on possible mistakes or if you like it (if there is anything likeable in there). Thank you in advance!

Severus tried to open his eyes but light stabbed him and he swiftly closed them again, tossing one arm around them. Pain in his head drummed like the hammer against the base of his skull. Room smelled differently, he frowned. Most of the last night was a blur, he had holes in his memory at the size of England. Apart from a headache and memory gaps, he felt…relaxed. All pent-up pressure, all anxiety was gone, he didn't feel this relaxed in years…decades even. 

One hand was tossed over the eyes, shielding them with the crook of his elbow, the other was stuck beneath something soft. Body next to him stirred and he instinctively pulled it closer, soft sigh and even breathing of his female companion were shooting. Female companion? Where, the hell, was he? Last thing he could remember … he was going for a nightcap with Miss Granger, everything after that was…missing.

Maybe he returned downstairs and seek out the girl with eccentric hair. Forcing himself to open his eyes he cracked the lids and glanced around the room. The room looked suspiciously familiar, but surely…he was in the hotel, all rooms looked alike. He needed the toilet. Carefully, not to disturb the sleeping female next to him he pulled his arm under her body and stood up. Who was she? All he could see was shoulders and portion of her back, her head was firmly buried under the mountain of pillows.  Curiously, he glanced around the room.

“ _No! No, no, no, no! Merlin…what have I done?_ ” Anxiety was back with vengeance and not a small amount of fear. The room looked like hurricane fizzed through it. Silently he accioed his things, dressing quietly and fast as possible. He tossed another glance at the bed and let the room, practically running down the stairs. Of course, his lock refused to open, the red light blinked at him. Pulling his wand, hissed

\- Alohamora - 

Electric lock sparkled and door slide open. Packing his things in a panic, wrecked his, now extremely painful all with white flashes and hot stabs, brain to remember something, anything from last night. “ _How could I be so weak, so stupid?_ ” portion of memory was swimming around his mind and he forced it to play out, dragging his trunk downstairs, the bloody elevator still wasn’t working.

_Her breasts bouncing up and down in front of his eyes. He was buried deep inside her snug heated channel. She was riding him like there was no tomorrow, finding purchase on his chest. His hands reached for the bouncy globes, toying with perky nipples. With every squeeze and pull her hips speed up. It was so easy to let go, but he tried to keep at least portion of common sense. As if she read his mind, he felt her shift, lean and more rub than impaling herself, her weight was welcomed on his stomach and chest. Kissing her way along his throat and jaw to the ear, she nibbled lightly on the soft pad before whispering_

_\- I’m on the potion. –_

_…And she was up again. His eyes darted from her dancing breasts to her face and back. Her eyes closed and focused on the feeling with a slack jaw. Pants and small mewls escaped her lips. A fine coat of sweat made her skin glisten in the darkness of the room._

_She was so exquisitely tight. Feeling her walls shake and quiver he dig his hands into her hips, locking her firmly in the position slightly above him. Bending his knees and pushing heels hard against the bed he jerked his hips up. She stilled and then moaned loudly, walls twitching around him. He continued to slam into her drawing more and more sounds, she raised her hands to the breasts playing with her own nipples, squeezing, and pulling and twisting hard. Until her walls grabbed him in a choke-hold, squeezing him almost painfully, her back arching and he moved his hands to support her back, her screams filled the room. Other than the sound, her body tightened and arched, gave off the appearance like she is suspended in time. Reveling in the sight, completely forgot about himself, until her hands landed on his inner thighs, falling behind her back and she dug the nails scratching sensitive tissue. And…he was there, next to her. The dam was broken, feeling of release, almost painful, wash over him as he jerked in orgasmic spasms…_

Slamming the card-key at the counter he growled at the girl behind it

\- I need emergency travel arrangements. - 

\- Sir? – the girl blinked at him and he glanced at the Muggle couple near them

\- **Special** travel arrangements. –

\- Yes, yes of course. Please, follow me. – she led him to the back office where the scrawny looking wizard was sitting behind the desk

\- How may I help you, Sir? –

\- I need an emergency port key. -   

\- Did you come here with a port key? –

\- No. –

\- What is the nature of emergency? – the tiny man barely looked at him

\- **Emergency** – he hissed at him and man looked up

\- Sir… -

\- Give me the bloody key or suffer the consequences. – hissed darkly leaning above the wizard threateningly – Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Scotland. Now. –

\- Yes, just a moment Sir. – squeaked the wizard and jogged to the other room

… _Her body slacked, like the marionette with cut strings, as her orgasm finally passed. She fell on top of him and he embraced her tightly, enjoying the feeling of their hearts beating so close one to another. It appeared that she didn’t have the desire to move at all, neither did he, not even bothering to pull his flaccid member out. Her head rested on his shoulder and he dug the fingers of one hand in it, basking in the feeling of…_

\- Here you are, Sir. – the scrawny man was handing him muggle ballpoint pen – Just click the top of the pen, and if you could… -

He grabbed the pen tightly and kicked the top. Magic wrapped around him, and he was at the Hogwarts gates, recognizing him, gates opened and he strode inside charming his trunk to float behind. Passing the distance from the gates to school in brisk long strides, lashing at himself along the way

“ _How could I allow for this to happen? Minerva is going to burn me alive! Damn the incompetence of the Dark Lord when he didn’t know how to finish the job properly! What am I to do now?_ ” What happened, how all started, he didn’t force her…did he? But…her position and reactions suggested otherwise. He stopped abruptly and trunk bumped lightly at the leg

… _They were sitting in her room, drinking extremely good Tequila. He watched her, with a knot in his lower stomach, as she licked the salt before taking a shot and biting the lemon slice_...

They were drinking but not nearly enough for him to forget himself in that way.

… _\- Professor… - they were on their fourth shot_

_\- Please, if we are going to drink, we are on the first name basis, at least for the time being. –_

_\- … -_

_\- Even muggles have that custom, I believe it is called “the rule of the inn table”. Around the drinking table… -_

_\- …everyone is equal and friends. – she finished and he laughed_

_\- Severus! You are laughing. – he like the sound of his name on her lips_

_\- It is known to happen on occasion, nothing so spectacular to notify Daily Prophet about it. –_

_\- The way they report, it just up their alley. -_

_\- I’ll drink to that Mi…Hermione. It will take some getting used to. –_

_\- Oh! I have real Swiss chocolate, it is sinfully good. You have to try it! – she jumped at her feet, made a step, tripped and landed on him, he reacted on impulse steadying her in a semi-embrace_

_Next thing he knew they were kissing, devouring each other would be a better description. Not breaking off the kiss, they staggered toward the bed, losing items of clothes on their way. Tripped on the path rug and landed on the bed, bumping their heads in the process. Separating their lips only for him to lose his jumper. She pushed him on his back and straddled him, setting the rhythm of the progress_ …

At least he didn’t do anything…improper…no, that was improper on its own…anything worth time spent in Azkaban.

\- Severus! What are you doing here a day earlier? –

\- Later Minerva. – he was nearly at the stairs to the dungeons

\- Severus? Did anything happen.? –

\- Everything is fine Minerva. Do I have today as my free time? –

\- Yes, you do, but… -

\- I’ll talk to you tomorrow then. – growled and rushed down. Entering his living space, he flicked the wand. Wards will stay, not allowing trespassers to bother him. Leaving a trail of discarded clothes, headed towards the bathroom, knowing that bathtub is already filling with hot water. “ _What part of **sidestep** is not understandable to me? I promised Minerva, I promised myself…and I royally fucked up!_ ” He glanced at his reflection in the mirror and stopped, his shoulders and collarbones were littered with bite-marks, purplish, dark. Stark contrast against his pale skin. His back sting and he tossed the glance over his shoulder turning his back to mirror. He had bloody scratch marks along the length of his back, and the half-moon marks on his rear-cheeks. He grinned. She was just…perfect. He knew he was damaged goods, outside the bedroom and inside, nothing new there. Submerging in the barely bearable hot water, hissing as wounds started to sting.  

He did have a…thing…for a bit of pain. Not too much though, too much pain would set him in a survival mood, but just a right dose…could go a long way. Not that any of his previous partners figured that out. She did. She figured it out and played him like Maestro plays the violin, never going over the edge, using it to her advantage. And by doing so she probably ruined him for sex with any other female for the rest of his life.

She did disperse some of the misconceptions he had about her. Hermione Granger might be naïve but she was far from a prude. Judging by the broken pieces of his memory and her careless remark, as well as the level of promiscuity he witnessed on the fourth evening of the conference, she was not averse to occasional…relaxation…without any obligations. Which was tempting but sadly not an exploitable trait. But…the most perfect of all was the power struggle and the way she reacted to anything he would do.  

… _The combination of alcohol and orgasm was so relaxing, he dozed off, for how long he wasn’t sure. But, it had to be for quite some time. What wakes him up where her nimble fingers, raising him to fullness again. She was laying next to him, prompted on one arm and studying his face carefully._

_\- That...is, not a toy… for little girls. – his brain still soaked with alcohol, though at that moment he started to doubt that alcohol had much to do to with the haziness in his brain_

_\- Are you sure? I do like to…play. –_

_\- Watch it, you might get burn. – his voice hoarse from what she was doing under the covers_

_\- I see no…danger. – she teased, the little minx_

_Faster than she could react he had both of her arms, crossed at wrists and pinned above her head, he was holding her loosely with just one hand. The other glided one finger between the dent of her breasts, over the tight muscles of her abdomen, resting it between her folds. He was looking at her, searching. She smirked, then chewed on her lip_

_\- What… -_

_\- Shhhhhhhhhhhh. –_

_She quieted down, he was still just looking at her. She started to squirm but he pinned her down with a bit more force_

_\- Shhhhhh. –_

_\- Will you do anything? –_

_\- I will… -_

_\- When? – he could hear the frustration in her voice_

_\- When the time comes. –_

_\- When…-_

_-Shhhhhhhhhh. – he kissed her, she relaxed, anticipating but nothing more come from him. After few more minutes she let one frustrating cry, he lightly rubbed his finger up and down and she moaned. He stilled his finger again, watching. He could feel the moist gathering at her core, dripping, coating his fingertip. Suddenly she started to kick and buckle_

_\- Willyoufuckmeallreadydosomething! –_

_\- Speaking in tongues, are we? –_

_She glared at him with a mixture of feelings ranging from anger to desire, they burned in her eyes. Finally, she slacked, relaxing all her muscles, giving up. He moved his finger rubbing small circles around her clitoris, her mouth opened and she panted, mewling. Her hips danced lightly but she was still, looking in his eyes. The heel of his palm rested on her lower stomach, while he played with series of small rubs, circles and pressures. Every now and then her back arched slightly, she was looking at him pleadingly. He slid the finger deeper, teasing the entrance and she raised her hips, eyes wide open and begging. He could feel small tremors beneath his palm. Sliding finger inside her in excruciatingly slow motion, made her whine and cry at the same time. He teased her exploring all sensitive spots inside her, and she ranged from fast pants to nearly screaming, her muscles started to tremble and he added another finger, parting them slightly, moving them with gradient increase of speed. Soon she was screaming, eyes screwed shut, face pinched in bliss, her hands clench and unclench, her back arching._

_Moving swiftly, he was between her legs, his tip snugged at her entrance but he waited. When she opened her eyes, he released her hands. Almost instantly she embraced him, clenching with her thighs, her nails dug into his skin and dragged the stingy lines against his shoulder blades. His hips moved of their own accord as he grunted. Her teeth found his shoulder and…he was lost. Time stopped as she gave him the best gift he could ever receive…she gave him precisely what he needed, without single uttered word_ …

Now…his whole world was up-side-down, Severus still couldn’t remember all the details, but he didn’t need to. What he could remember would haunt him for the rest of his days. Kiss at the Ministry Ball…last night…everything only emphasized…. “ _What am I going to do now? Why I didn’t just walk away?_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I Just) Died In Your Arms" - Cutting Crew
> 
> Oh, I, I just died in your arms tonight  
> It must've been something you said  
> I just died in your arms tonight
> 
> I keep looking for something I can't get  
> Broken hearts lie all around me  
> And I don't see an easy way  
> To get out of this
> 
> Her diary sits by the bedside table  
> The curtains are closed, the cat's in her cradle  
> Who would've thought  
> That a boy like me could come to this?
> 
> Oh-oh-oh, whoa  
> Oh, I, I just died in your arms tonight  
> It must've been something you said  
> I just died in your arms tonight  
> Oh-oh-oh, whoa
> 
> Oh, I, I just died in your arms tonight  
> It must've been some kind of kiss  
> I should've walked away  
> I should've walked away
> 
> Is there any just cause for feeling like this?  
> On the surface, I'm a name on a list  
> I try to be discreet  
> But then blow it again
> 
> I've lost and found, it's my final mistake  
> She's loving by proxy, no give and all take  
> 'Cause I've been thrilled to fantasy  
> One too many times
> 
> Oh-oh-oh, whoa  
> Oh, I, I just died in your arms tonight  
> It must've been something you said  
> I just died in your arms tonight
> 
> Oh, I, I just died in your arms tonight  
> It must've been some kind of kiss  
> I should've walked away  
> I should've walked away
> 
> It was a long hot night  
> She made it easy, she made it feel right  
> But now it's over, the moment is gone  
> I followed my hands, not my head  
> I know I was wrong
> 
> Oh, I, I just died in your arms tonight  
> It must've been something you said  
> I just died in your arms tonight
> 
> Oh, I, I just died in your arms tonight  
> It must've been some kind of kiss  
> I should've walked away  
> I should've walked away


	13. New Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus can run but he cannot hide...from Hermione and she is a determent to get him, no matter what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a New Year special ;)
> 
> I just wrote this as special, but this chapter change's a bit the flow of the story I had in mind :)
> 
> HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! 
> 
> P.S.: A bit of roughness in this chapter so feel warned!

Big snowflakes glided against the high arch window, making a scenery behind looking like the enchanted place from the fairy-tale. Hermione diverted her eyes from serene sight to her former Head of House and sipped the tea. 

\- I’ll gladly attend to your party, Minerva. This is giving me the chance to talk to you about Master Snape and plans I have with, or rather, for him. –  Minerva looked at her over the rim of teacup quizzically – Since I returned from Spain I sent him around ten owls, my head of department sent him an owl, I even bullied Kingsley in sending him an owl…he ignored them all. –

\- I don’t know what to tell you, Hermione, Severus is…he isn’t back to his old ways, he is worse. I didn’t know that was even possible. Students are terrified of him, more than ever, and rightfully so. Even the house elves are now afraid of him. –

\- He was always nice to house elves. What happened? – her heart quickened, she was looking for an excuse to stir the conversation in that direction for the last half hour without being too obvious

\- I sent an elf with some fruits one day, he skipped every meal that day. Elf returned to kitchens traumatized. Severus just lost it, threatening a poor creature to use it as fireplace ornament if he or any of them dare to bring him banana ever again. I am at a loss what to do with him. -   

\- I’m afraid part of it, if not all, is my blame. – sighed, fighting off the urge to grin like Cheshire cat. Two weeks passed since her return from Barcelona, from the moment she woke up in the empty room and discovered he disappeared from the hotel. She knew then that something went wrong between their last passionate coupling and the morning. Minerva’s features hardened.

\- Yours? – Hermione was well familiar with the intonation of the question

\- Yes. – she sighed again, it was the time for some hard truths – You see, I tried to seduce him… - paused, unsure how to proceed or how much to reveal - …and you know me, I’m blunt. Things…somewhat get out of control. –

\- Hermione, you know I love you dearly, but Severus… -

\- I know Minerva, - she waved her hand dismissively – but you see… I… I’m in love with him, for years now. I just couldn’t sit on that anymore and not even try… -

\- Did you try to talk to him? – sighed in relief, she didn’t expect this reaction, Minerva, Albus, Poppy, Molly and Arthur, even Harry…all of them were fiercely protective of him  

\- And risk him shutting me out completely? No, I did not. I do want to continue working with him, regardless. –

\- What happened in Spain? –

\- I…succeeded, or at least I thought so. We spent one night together and the next morning… -

\- Let me guess, the last night at the conference?  When he returned earlier. –

\- Yes. Apparently, I made a mistake. Don’t look at me like that, I do not regret a single second of that night. But now, I have a hard time reaching him for the continuation of our cooperation on the project. – she sighed again, everything inside her was falling apart – While we were there, he was helping me with sorting out research data and without his input, I’d never discovered…Anyway, I have a new research based on that discovery, and I want him as a partner on the project. I already talked to head of my department and Kingsley, and I’m ready to set things in motion if I get your consent. –

\- My consent? –

\- Yes, one big part of the project includes potions. If you agree, I would move that part of research here, in school. That way, you wouldn’t lose your potion professor and he can still work with me. I’d occupy my old apprentice room if that is all right. –

\- I won’t object to scientific cooperation with Ministry if you manage to get his consent. –

\- That is the beauty of it, I do not need his consent. I’d prefer his willingness, but I’ll take what I can get. –

\- As I stated, I do not object to cooperation, but Hermione if you use your research to get to him… -

\- I don’t. Well, it is the means to the end, but that is beside the point. He is **the best** Potions Master on this hemisphere and I want my research to be successes. I want the best on my team…willing or unwilling. – she stood up – I’ll go and make arrangements now. -   

\- Tread carefully, Hermione. –

\- I will don’t worry Minerva, hurting him is the furthest thing on my mind. Please don’t tell him anything, let his wrath fall on my head, I can handle…him. See you in two days, Minerva. – with that she left very worried Headmistress, praying that her plan will work.

If he wants to run, he might try, but she is damn if she doesn’t make it as difficult as possible. The morning when she discovered him gone, first she cried, then she was furious, raging angry, ready to hex him into oblivion or at least died trying. Now she was just determent.  Determent to get as much of him as he was willing to offer, and he **was…more than a little…willing** to offer at least on one part.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Two days later found her again sipping tea with Minerva who looked more than a little concerned.

\- I’m afraid that you must prepare your quarters alone, given that you asked me to stay quiet. Everything else is signed and ready. –

\- Thank you. I have few days of time during the New Year break. – she smiled, covering nervous knot in her stomach, she mustn’t lose her temper or her nerve.

The fury in black busted through the door, booming, waving angrily with a parchment with official Ministry stamp

\- Care to explain this Minerva? –

\- She can’t but I can. – she turned to him, mustering all the strength she could find to remain calm.

\- I refuse. –

\- I’m afraid it is not up to you to refuse, you could, you had your chance but given that you choose to ignore it… -

\- That might have been the clue to some, Miss Granger. – he hissed

\- Your contract to the Ministry lasts for another year, it is, to my understanding binding. They asked me who do I want for a partner and I listed you. –

He stared at her, visibly trembling from anger before he managed to choke out one menacing “ _Fine_ ” and stormed off. Turning to Minerva she smiled meekly

\- Don’t say I didn’t warn you. –

\- I guess it is time to have a little talk with my project partner if you will excuse me, Minerva. –

\- Do try not to damage him or yourself. –

She nodded, standing up, nervously straightening non-existent wrinkles from her skirt. Taking a deep breath and tossed to Minerva over the shoulder

\- Minerva, if either one of us does not, shows up at your party, provided that we didn’t end up in the infirmary, you can consider that I managed to … tame the beast… at least a little bit. –

\- Good luck. – was the last she heard before the door shut behind her. Fighting the panic that loomed on the outskirts of her mind Hermione advanced to the dungeons. Passing through the Potions classroom. She pushed the door of his office and to her surprise wards let her pass. Finding the right book on the shelf, pushed it and door glided open, ever since the war he refused to take the role of the Head of House again, and moved to much smaller living quarters behind the classroom. Carefully, she stretched one arm but those wards didn’t try to stop her either. She passed through the hallway, living room and straight to his private laboratory, annoyed as he was, she knew he will be there, bend above the cauldron.

And…she was right. He looked like a stormy cloud, releasing steam as much as the cauldron that was bubbling. She leaned against the wall, waiting for him to notice her. Good twenty minutes later he addressed her, not raising his eyes from the cauldron

\- You had no right… -

\- I had every right. –

\- State your business Miss Granger… -

\- Are we back to Miss Granger now? – she raised the eyebrow in the challenge if he is willing to ignore hippogriff in the room she wasn’t. “ _Better to clear all out_ ” He raised his head and glared at her, look she didn’t see for a long time, reserved for their little group, during the war. With an angry wave of the hand, he suspended his workstation and she marvelled his skill, every time she witnessed it, heat and cold fought for domination in her stomach as he approached her, looming threateningly.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Severus stormed down the stairs, forcing himself to feel anger instead of almost paralysing fear. Life was barely worth living…ever since he returned from Spain. He ignored Minerva, he ignored the owls, teaching and sitting in the room, staring at the fire…reliving was all he did. Why was she so dead set on torturing him? What in the name of Merlin did she want from him? “ _Besides to rattle your bones and fuck your brains out…hopefully. At least once more._ ” The thought was injected by his traitorous brain, and he suspected the one with lesser IQ. He gave her **everything** he had. Not able to steady his mind, walked into the private potions lab and started to brew, almost blindly.

The wards trembled slightly, warning him that someone passed through them. She was coming, she was the only one who could pass by them, after she finished with her apprenticeship he never revoked her right. Focusing on the cauldron he prepared himself to face her. Hermione entered the laboratory and leaned on the wall, beige skirt and soft brown jumper draw his eyes like a magnet. If he ignores her, maybe she will leave. “ _But you don’t want her to leave, you…enough! She has no business coming here and destroying your life. Not that I had much life, to begin with. Why doesn’t she just leave the fuck me alone?_ ” When he felt that his resolve fading, decided to address her

\- You had no right… -

\- I had every right. –

\- State your business Miss Granger… -

\- Are we back to Miss Granger now? – she was challenging him, fine. If she wants to fight he can provide that. Angrily he cast a suspension charm over the cauldron and in a blink of an eye was above her, hissing

\- What are you implying? –

She moved from the wall, dodging him and walking with small paces, probably assessing the best way to start

\- I am not implying anything, but given that we shared… -  her voice was calm and firm

\- You, insolent little brat, what are you trying to pull off? Are you going to try and …blackmail me now? –

\- Miss Granger? Little brat? What happened to **Hermione**? – she turned to him, her eyes flaring daggers

\- So, you are going to use it…against me. How Slytherin of you **Miss Gryffindor Princess.** Go ahead, try. See if it works. –

She pushed him with more force than he would expect from her. Poking his right shoulder, forcing him to back towards the wall. Hissing at him, bouncing on the balls of her feet. Her hair looked like it had grown in volume, the reality was that her curls bounced angrily. She looked…adorable…like an angry poodle puppy, his heart melted. Her words and poking in his shoulder, on the other hand, pushed him in that dark, dangerous place of his mind, place where he could not quite...

\- I was refereeing to drinking and to the rule of the in, but you are obviously incapable of seeing past what happened later. Maybe I should ask what happened to **my fiery witch** in that case? Blackmail you? Me? How dare you? What are you, teenager? I don’t know about you but I can very well separate my sex life from my work. One and the other do not mix. I requested your cooperation as an expert, as the best Potions Master in the country if not in Europe. And I wanted you on my team. If I have you, I don’t need anyone else, I won’t get incompetent idiots, I won’t drag a ball chained to my ankle. –

\- I’m warning you… - growled threateningly, she was still pushing him and alarm in his head was sounding danger

\- And that supposed to intimidate me? Really Severus? Considering, in Spain I had to do everything, initiate…everything…the worse you can do it is to try and hex me. And even that… –

Everything stilled for a moment. She continued with her tantrum but he didn’t pay attention anymore. So, she initiated the kiss…He wasn’t sure if he is happy, scared, hopeful, humiliated or angry. Staring at her realized she stopped talking and looked at him with angry puppy eyes. Her hair flew wildly as she shook her head and headed to the door, tossing in her departure

\- You are my partner on the project, and that is final. Otherwise, when you figure out what do you want from me **Severus,** let me know. –

His hands clenched, all that he was feeling, all the anger, all the pain, all…just boiled in his blood, colouring the rims of his vision black. Before he could react or control his action he was next to her, jars and bottles in the ingredients cabinet rattled as he slammed her next to the wooden door. Holding her neck in a tight grip, pinning her to the surface. She raised her chin looking at him with eyes that burned with spite, challenge and something else, something deep inside them barely visible but there.

The other hand yanked her skirt up, tearing the string of her thong. The elastic string snapped hitting his hand, she hissed but continued to stare at him, hidden fire in her eyes getting stronger. With one motion of the hand, he was nearly disrobed.

~ S ~ S~ S ~

She lost him, she could tell. He was staring at her with glassy impenetrable gaze but she could tell, he wasn’t listening anymore. Stopping abruptly, she felt lost, anger turned into a burning sensation between her legs, somewhere in the middle of the speech. Walking away before she does something she would, well not regret, but what could irreparably damage any further contact. Trying to keep at least small piece of dignity.

Tears burned behind her eyes. She told him everything, everything save from admitting her love and he just stared blankly. Words bounced of off him like droplets of water, there was no way she could reach him. Giving voice to her frustration she tossed

\- You are my partner on the project, and that is final. Otherwise, when you figure out what do you want from me **Severus,** let me know. –

Suddenly, he was holding her neck, slamming her at the wooden cabinet. She wanted to spite him, but his eyes changed, they were split in half for the lack of better description. One-half was dark and still, other reflected deep burn. For anyone else, those eyes would be the embodiment of how true fear looks like, for her…she felt a moist soaking the bit of material she bought in hope that something would happen.

His other hand unceremoniously pulled her skirt up to the waist, ripping the carefully chosen garment, without noticing it. She hissed at sting as rubber burned her skin, one wave of his hand and he was standing in front of her only in his shirt. She took a shuddery breath. His laconic almost unconscious display of magical ability was a special aphrodisiac to her.  

Roughness was not something she enjoyed but his need was raw and so primal, it fueled her. The hand slipped from her throat to the shoulder and she curled her hands around his neck, pulling him down. His lips entrapped hers, shivers crept down her spine from the intensity of the kiss. His other hand kneaded her thigh. Her legs wrapped around his waist.

His entrance was fast and forceful but the stretch and the burn were welcomed. She didn’t know if this was an expression of his desire or attempt to punish, either way, she wanted it. Tongues fought for predominance. Every sharp jerk of his hips hit the mystical spot in her, stars danced in front of her eyes. She dug her hand into his hair, pulling it hard, scraping the skin with every clench. Moans, whimpers and grunts were obscured with the erratic jingling of glass in the cabinet, something fell and the pungent smell filled the room. Neither of them reacted. Oblivious to everything but their own need. Her thighs clench at his waist with crushing strength, she was at the point where nothing mattered anymore, nothing but the fast-approaching end. Feeling a swell of pent-up pressure, squeezed inside her like a huge balloon ready to burst. She needed him to be more…more…satisfying her need she bit her teeth in his lip, hard. 

Light exploded in her eyes, feeling like an electric current flowing through her spine and limbs. His growl was reaching her from a great distance. Floating in the haze of peace she felt him leaning heavily against her, his heart hammering. He provided her with stable support, even if he didn’t look much more balanced than she was. His face buried in her neck, hand still entangled in his hair slide to his cheek, caressing it gently.

\- I think you need to refill your supply of spotted toad bile.  – he nodded, still hiding in the crook of her neck – So, was this sweet farewell or do we move somewhere tad bit comfortable at least? –

She loved their embrace but ornament on the door took a liking to her left cheek, imprinting itself in soft tissue. He only shrugged, still hiding, she smiled

\- Severus, either take me to bed or at least remove ornaments from the door, they are too fond of my backside. Besides, for what I have in mind, this room is…impractical. – whispered, allowing the love to soften her voice.

Finally, he raised his head to look at her, defeat written clearly on his face. She felt like crying, why did he look like that? Voice was barely audible broken whisper

\- I… I… Did I…. –

\- The only thing I complain about, the only thing that hurt me are these ornaments. Can we go somewhere, anywhere but this cabinet, at this point, even the brewing bench looks overly inviting. – she smiled, nuzzling to his face and leaving a trail of small kisses along his temple.

He stepped back, wrapping her in his embrace, silently carrying her…

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Hours later…she was leaning on the headboard of his bed. Severus hold her in a loose embrace around the hip, his head on her thighs. Combing fingers through the hair that reminded her of liquid black gold Hermione felt better and at the same time more scared than for a long time.  

\- Would you like to go to the party? Midnight is coming soon. – he shook his head, trailing a finger next to the pink line on his back, she whispered

\- You didn’t heal them… - he shook his head again, it appeared that he had slow healing rate, something she will have to take into consideration, but for how long? – I’m sorry. Are you into blood… - another shook – Good, nor am I. – she felt bit better, considering that she still had nightmares…Feeling bit uneasy by withdrawn silence, she leaned to kiss his shoulder blade. This night was fantastic, but she still didn’t know where she stood - Do you want me to go, to vacate your room? – his embrace tightened – All right, I’ll stay for a while longer, but I do have to prepare my room. Minerva offered me my old apprentice room if you don’t mind. – embrace tightened, even more, he shook his head again, planting a light kiss on her leg

\- No, …here… - it looked like words choked him

– Severus… - he rolled to his back looking at her

\- What now? – he whispered

\- I don’t know. –

\- What do you expect of me? –

\- To work with me, to fuck me in free time, if you don’t mind. –

\- Is that all? –

\- Do you want more? – he shrugged, looking lost – Then…it’s all. –

\- For how long? –

\- I don’t know… - “ _For the eternity! Would you mind that?_ ”

\- How long the project lasts? –

\- I got funds and permits for two months on the potions part, after that…who knows. – her heart fell, did he just put a timer on them? He stayed silent, staring at the ceiling. She slid down, next to him. His hands reached for her, pulling her close to him, burying face in her hair. Two months…it was better than nothing, two months were a chance, something she didn’t have before. She could work with that. Clock chimed

\- Severus, - he looked at her – Happy New Year. – he just kissed her…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Year - Test your reflex
> 
> I'm running 'round in circles  
> Trying to find some peace of mind  
> Cause it's a lonely place when  
> All the we need we cannot find  
> Wait, wait cause I don't wanna be lost  
> Wait, wait cause I don't wanna be lost  
> And I don't wanna be the one to drag you down
> 
> Wait  
> For a new day, for a new year  
> I'll be standing on my own  
> In a new place, with my hands out  
> Looking for the answers
> 
> It's such a sweet solution  
> To close our eyes and walk in line  
> And all our contributions  
> Just seem to fade away with time  
> Wait, wait cause I don't wanna be lost  
> Wait, wait cause I don't wanna be lost  
> And I don't wanna be the one to drag you down
> 
> Wait  
> For a new day, for a new year  
> I'll be standing on my own  
> In a new place, with my hands out  
> Looking for the answers
> 
> Wait  
> For a new day, for a new year  
> I'll be standing on my own  
> In a new place, with my hands out  
> Looking for the answers
> 
> I cant stand here, waiting  
> With my hands out, for the ceiling  
> But I won't lie, I won't try  
> I can't walk such a straight line  
> And these bright lights, surround me  
> People are so friendly  
> But I won't lie, I won't try  
> I can't pretend that it's alright, no
> 
> Wait  
> For a new day, for a new year  
> I'll be standing on my own  
> In a new place, with my hands out  
> Looking for the answers
> 
> Write down your name  
> C'mon baby, write down your name  
> C'mon baby, write down your name  
> C'mon baby, write down your name


	14. Bottle you up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two weeks after New Years Eve and Severus already has a hard time to ...let go...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, this chapter may remind you, and it's quite possibly inspired by Chapter 17 of Doing it for the Order by Desert_Sea. Well my amateur scribbling is nowhere near her works, but I am often inspired by her, so not the first nor the last time.
> 
> Also, If my writing seems bit nervous and jumpy, it's fine, I'm trying to quit smoking (bad habit) so I'm as nervous as I can be... Oh, finding songs also becomes a problem...., the story took a life of her own, and tables are turned now.

\- Mr. and Miss. Wilkins report to your Head of House, she will issue you a new schedule for your potions classes, from now on you are not to attend my classes together. – two pairs of identical teary eyes looked at him

\- Professor, please… - started the boy, but one raised eyebrow was enough to make him quiet.  

\- Leave now. – kids bolted like someone propelled them from the classroom. He knew that Pomona won’t place them in different classes, that was a sad impossibility, but the scare was good. A month ago, he would give them a week worth of detention of scrubbing cauldrons, but now…

Two weeks into January and his entire life was changed, he was reluctant to give detentions opting for more severe points deductions or even additional essay reports. He simply didn’t want to waste any time in detention, the time he could spend with her. Pondering on the long-term consequences this behaviour may have on his reputation, deeming that it would be easier to repair the damage than to lose any precious moment he was so graciously granted. Experiencing this was worth even staying alive.

Entering his quarters, he found Hermione, dressed to go and bent over the table, scribing on the parchment. The lovely curve of her lower back with the arch of the spine above and long, slender legs (“ _Strong enough to squeeze a life out of you._ ”) below.

\- That is an odd way of taking notes, but if you pondering on adopting it as a habit, I won’t protest. – his voice was husky

\- I was leaving you a message. –

\- Message? –

\- Yes, I need to go to my laboratory or home or… - she frowned looking lost - …well few more places, depending on where I left it… -

\- Would you care to give some meaning to your blabbing at least at one point… - he fought the smile, she picked up this habit over the years, and even if he would find it infuriatingly annoying in others, with her it was endearing. She was thinking about work, intensely, and attempting to function, which resulted in an endless stream of explanations so confusing that the smartest thing was just not to listen or snap her out of it.

\- Oh, for the next stage I’ll need an apron and glows. – he nodded, that was not the news, waiting to hear the reason for her need to go on a hunt for Merlin knows what he started to remove his teaching robe – My set is…in my office, or home, or…. –

\- And the fact that you are in Potion Masters quarters, stuck between two laboratories, and that you probably have more than one set at your grasp escaped you because…? –

\- I did try yours…. – she frowned at him again

\- That must’ve gone well. –

\- Now you see why I have to go and… -

\- I do not. – he smiled taking her in the embrace, she nestled in his arms sighing – Have you forgotten that you are a witch? Or did you forget just the correct spell? -  

\- I won’t shrink your equipment! –

\- Yes, because I do not possess spare set. –

\- Ok so I don’t have to go, this still disrupts all my plans… - they were still in the middle of the workroom and he still waited for her to choose where they are going to go. – I wanted to start this phase hours ago, so I can place a stasis around this time, and I didn’t even start. At this point, there is no need to begin before tomorrow morning. This sets us a whole day behind. –

\- A dreadful oversight from someone who is otherwise tree days ahead of the schedule. –

\- I have a plan with potential free days… - she gave him one fiery look full of hidden mischief and his heart started to beat faster before it sunk deep.

\- Hmmm… -

\- Are you not curious about the plan? –

\- Not a curious person by nature. –

\- You were a spy! –

\- That, my dear, is quite the opposite of curious. Let us solve the problem at hand. I will prepare us a tea, and you can dive into the dresser and find the box with spare equipment. – she frowned, his dresser didn’t look big enough to hold clothes and one box little less more of them, he chuckled – Trust me, just dig into the left corner. Dresser was a gift from Albus, and it is far bigger than it looks like. -  

Fiddling around the kettle he sighed “ _How big of a fool you can be? How easy you just give up? Two weeks and you sending her to rummage through your personal belongings._ ” But this didn’t felt like two weeks, it felt like they were together for a lifetime already, and that they will stay like that for another lifetime. Dull ache, simmering at the bottom of his heart flared again. He promised himself he won’t hold her back when the time comes and she turns around to leave he will let her go. A month and a half…then again maybe even less if…

….” _You are a complete and undeniable idiot! Everything is hidden in that blasted dresser, **everything**!_ ”

\- Severus…? – her voice was a huge question mark, hushed and confused “ _Well, it was nice while it lasted_ ” he thought grimly walking to the bedroom with a knot in his stomach and hands firmly clenched in fists. She was holding a box looking at its content like a kitten at yarn box. And it was…not the box he was afraid she might find, it was the one equally embarrassing and totally forgotten. Trust Albus to give you the gift that would be aid until it decided to be your demise…she was surrounded with boxes, like she was digging up his entire life from the bottom of the blasted dresser.

\- Did you at least attempt to look for laboratory equipment? – his voice sounded annoyed, even more, edgy than he wanted to show

\- Of course, I did, but your dresser kept swamping me with all those boxes. Ummm… I was curious about this one… -

\- That… - he cleared his throat uncomfortably – was a big thing back then, after the first war, in certain circles… -

\- But not your thing… -

\- No, not …- he stopped looking for correct word, she moved from the floor onto the bed, still hugging the box and looking at him, beckoning him to join her

\- Then why did you… -

\- I was a spy. – he shrugged, it was hard to explain – We knew he will return and I… -

\- You had to stay in the role, neither here nor there. – he nodded again – These are all Muggle products and books. –

\- Yes. The biggest dirty secret of pure-blooded elite… -  his voice still bitter, after all those years. He plucked the box from her hands and placed it on the floor, crawling over her. She raised her hands to embrace him.

\- So, it is there… I mean, did you picked it up… - she continued asking between the kisses, her small hands working through the buttons of his shirt, he sighed

\- No. – tracing kisses along her neck, licking at the sweet pulsating vein, drawing soft sigh and shortening her breath. He loved how she reacted to his kisses, arching her back just to press fully against his body.

\- When then? Why? – she was relentless, he sighed, he could usually kiss away the questions giving her half-answers but not this time…rolling next to her he stared at the ceiling

\- It is very complicated question Hermione, and I’m not quite sure you want to know the answer… -

\- You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, I’m just trying to understand. To understand you. –

\- Is it bothering you? –

\- No, I find it quite relaxing. I don’t have to… restrain…myself. It is liberating. I do believe you destroyed me for others, for the lifetime. –

\- I highly doubt that. But as long as you are convinced…I’ll be happy to…compensate to you, for my transgression. – he grinned pulling her on top of him in embrace, he was already sporting unhealthy tenth on his pants and aching to feel her around him.

\- How…gallant of you my dear sir. – she smiled slightly, muttering a spell, getting rid of their clothes. Her hand wandered to his rigidly saluting member, shuddery breath escaped him as his hips jerked up towards her touch – I will hold you to your word, but first I want to know…. So, you just talk... and I’ll…play. – she was kneeling next to him and he reached to her but she batted his hands away – A…a…a…no touching, or I’ll be forced to restrain you. –

\- I wouldn’t advise that. –

\- Why? – she was looking at his eyes and he had a feeling that she is somehow looking straight into his soul – I just want to understand. –

\- Milady you may discover… that my person is… a more of a… puzzle… than you can… handle. – his sentence came up in discontinuous words, not sounding convincing, while her hands fondled his member, his balls and one of her fingers slide behind his balls, pressing on his perineum. “ _Where the hell did she learn that?_ ”

\- Hmmm. – Hermione was grinning like a Cheshire cat – See, I just took a peek at one of those books in the box, and … mmmmmmm … keep talking and I’ll show you what else did I learned. – sound that came out of his throat was high pitched and intangible – So, how and why did you…well you know? –

\- For someone … dead set on asking…you are…aaaaaghhhhhhhhhhha… - her fingers melted his brain for a second applying pressure on the right spot – Answer is kind of a mood killer. – he admitted finally

\- Lett me take care of the mood and…quit… stalling – tip of her tongue circled around the sensitive head, paying attention to the slit and tickling at the spot beneath it, that wrinkled pinhead of a highly sensitive skin. She charmed her hair to remove her from her face and allow him full view “ _How much is a peak in her vocabulary?_ ” judging by everything before…she was intense but raw, now she exhibited a deliberate finesse. He groaned at the loss as she raised her head – Start talking… -

\- Well… - she locked her eyes with his and with one hand made a ring around his shaft, cutting the circulation and connection with his balls, and pressing between her small and ring finger the base of his balls, applying pressure at canals. He shortly prayed to Merlin that she knew what she was doing, before majority of rational thoughts left him, and he focused hard on answering her question. Other hand continued to fondle his balls, massaging perineum. Her head bobbed up and down the length. – First, if you feel numb inside… you need something strong…. to …spark you up. Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhuhuuhhhhhhh… Something you can…. feeeeelllll…. Pain and pleasure…. are…closely…connected… Secondly…it is a handy…kink to have…if you tend…ahahaaaaaaahhhhhhh…to…to end up…displeasinggggg the…. Dark Lord…aaahhhhaa lot. Through, I would not recommend…. crushiatus…as…. a form of foreplay.... -    

 Need to explore was overwhelming, but she kept a firm grasp on few strategic spots, preventing him to reach relief, applying more and more pressure at the same time, nudging the urge. Electric shots of pain traveled down his spine, having the well-known effect. Still holding his gaze, she released his member from her mouth with wet plop, licking her lips

-  And the box, did you find…suitable partner… - she choked on her words and intensify her gaze, lowering her head again, squeezing his balls bit stronger than necessary or pleasant, her tongue swiped around the base of the head and he shook his head with grunt, unable to give answer immediately…

\- No, from me, was …. expected… the opposite. It lasted…for couple of years…and then… quieted down. – he panted the words out fast – Hermione, I need to… -

\- Just a bit longer love. – she mumbled not stopping to lick and suck – Would you be willing to…play…? –

\- Merlin witch…stop…torturing me! –

\- You can handle it. Well, would you? –

\- At this ppoint…I’d say yes… to just about anything… - he felt pressure pushing at every nerve ending he had, hissing in his ears and forcing his heart to drum loudly against his ribs.

She mumbled one “ _Mhm_ ” and took pity on him, releasing the pressure around the base of the shaft and allowing the flow between balls and his member. A sudden rush of blood and semen, encouraged by the still present massage, pushed him over the edge, in an almost painful swell of a release, sending his hips jerk fast as his hand dug into her curls, fixing her head and mouth around him. The orgasm exploded in his head, spilling like the molten lava in toe-curling intensity. She never moved away, didn’t even attempt, continuing to massage applying the right amount of pressure at any moment, intensifying the experience, making him…almost scream.  

Finally, he relaxed, floating in a haze of emptiness. She climbed up and pressed a kiss on his lips. He could taste himself on them…

\- I’m…. – tried, but the brain refused to connect words with meaning

\- Voldemort, he wasn’t big on sex? –

\- No, he was not. Why? –

\- You were lucky there… - she grinned and he squeezed her in a tight embrace, burying his face in her hair

\- I had luck here. – it was so easy to let go with her, to just surrender. He revelled in a fact that he gave up control to her. That was the scariest thing he could do and with her it came naturally, he knew, instinctively, that she won’t hurt him. “ _Or maybe because I know she will when she leaves. Maybe because I’m ready to let go, I know there is nothing more she can do…_ ” thoughts were a small piece of soap in a muggle Olympic pool “ _Did she called me **love**? Well, even if she did, don’t keep your hopes up…_ ”

\- Severus… - her crooning finally reached him

\- Hm? –

\- Nothing, rest now. I’m going to make us fresh tea. – she tried to wiggle but he tightened embrace, no, he won’t let her go…now or ever…he had a month and a half to figure out how to keep her for life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bottle You Up - Zendaya
> 
> If loving you were a crime,  
> I'd do the hardest time  
> You are perfection, nearly every time, yeah  
> You know it kills me  
> I can't always be right here  
> 'Cause right now you love me  
> Then you disappear
> 
> Wish I could always have you here with me  
> Wish I could hold ya, never let you leave  
> Wish I could put it away, save it for a rainy day  
> Wish I could bottle you up  
> If I wanna hear your voice inside of me  
> I'll drink it up and you're alive in me  
> Then I could put it away, save it for a rainy day  
> Wish I could bottle you up, bottle you up
> 
> Right now you're mine  
> But we're running out of time  
> It's part of the rush, it's taking me high (high)  
> You know it kills me  
> We can't always be right here  
> 'Cause right now you love me  
> Then you disappear
> 
> Wish I could always have you here with me  
> Wish I could hold ya, never let you leave  
> Wish I could put it away, save it for a rainy day  
> Wish I could bottle you up  
> If I wanna hear your voice inside of me,  
> I'll drink it up and you're alive in me  
> Then I could put it away, save it for a rainy day  
> Wish I could bottle you up [x10]
> 
> Wish I could always have you here with me (here with me)  
> Wish I could hold ya, never let you leave  
> Wish I could put it away, save it for a rainy day  
> Wish I could bottle you up  
> If I wanna hear your voice inside of me,  
> I'll drink it up and you're alive in me  
> When I can put it away, save it for a rainy day  
> Wish I could bottle you up [x7]
> 
> Then I could put it away, save it for a rainy day  
> Wish I could bottle you up  
> Bottle you up.


	15. I Want To Belong To You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two can play the game...and enjoy...up to the point :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Even if I named this chapter by the song I do believe that better name for it would be "Be careful what you wished for" ;)

Hermione tried to wiggle out of the embrace, only to find herself locked in a stronger one. Nesting her head on his shoulder, feeling like she finally found a place she belongs to.

\- Hermione… - his voice sounded sleepy, just a dark soft rumble reverberating from his chest on  which she was following a pattern, unconsciously writing love runes

\- Yes…-

\- How…how much did you manage to read? – 

\- Not much, I mostly looked at titles and opened one book on the picture. - she chuckled – I have a confession to make, Jenny gave me some of her books before, so most of it I knew…in theory…from before. –

\- You always were a talented student… -

\- Thank you, professor. – giggled – Oh, Severus. You should throw away that ghastly thing from the box in the corner. The second set of robes and mask, I didn’t touch them though, had enough of that after the war. –

She rolled over as he sat straight in bed with half frozen half scared look on his face.

\- I am sorry, I forgot about them… - he appeared more ashamed than anything – You handled… -

\- Yes, when they prepared trials, I was an assistant, at the time I wanted to be within the legal department, so I volunteered… -

\- Surely, they could spare an Auror… - he was angry now, she sat down placing her hand on his biceps, asking for his attention

\- Maybe, but they didn’t. I had a quite unpleasant surprise before I learned how to counter the spells. – he smiled at her, pulling her in the tight hug - I’m sorry you had to… No wonder you gave up on the law. –

\- Oh, that was not the reason, actually, that was the only interesting thing…it is just… not enough challenge. – she caressed the side of his face, pulling him for a kiss – Why looking like that? –

\- I am afraid Miss Granger, I was born with the face, and not much can be done in that department. – he glanced at her down the length of his nose

\- And I’m glad you are, I am kind of a fond of that face, and hate it to see it attached to someone else. -  she pushed him down on the bed, giggling – You look like I messed up with your cauldron. You wince or change subject… -

\- Has ever occurred to you that I am doing my best to put that part of my life behind me? –

\- It did, and I know you won’t be able to, no matter how much you try. It influenced you, made you the person you are today. And I happen to be attached to that person; in fact, I am very fond of it. – she kissed him again, smiling as his eyes softened – And I discovered that you do possess hidden talents I am getting rapidly attached to. –

\- Are you? Is that a sign of greed I detect in your voice Princess? – he was above her

\- Maybe. I am willing to do anything to get what I … desire… -

\- Even, playing with the dangerous dark wizard? – he trailed the kisses down her temples, earlobe, nibbling it slightly and down the neck

\- Especially if I get to play with said dark wizard, but… he is not soooooo…dangerous, not to me. – she gasped the words when he reached her breasts.  

\- Is that so? – he teased, nibbling lightly before sucking one hardened bud in his mouth, teasing it slightly with his teeth, rolling the other between fingers, her chest arched to him, as an electric cord, spread the pressure through abdomen pooling it in her core, making her drip.

\- It is, - short pants and small whimpers escaped her -  in fact, I can control him quite well, surprisingly… -

\- Hmh, let us see… - he mumbled, trailing the kisses down the line that carried the sensation just second ago, she twisted trying to escape and take control but he pinned her to the bed with charm “ _When did he manage to…, I never heard him…, wandless…wordless…magic_ ” she felt her arousal rising. He spread her knees with his shoulders “ _His shoulders are much broader than they appear_ ” but in her opinion, that was applicable to all of him, inside and out.  

His lips attached to her groins and she screamed, kicking and laughing at his tickling

\- Stop it, stop!!! Not that, stooooopppp itttt! –

\- Hm, did you say something? – he blinked at her, his fingers found the spot just below her entrance, narrowing his eyes at her, daring her to live up to her words. For Hermione, it was a losing battle; she already melted into his touch, compliant as the wet clay. Pressing her head back as his fingers applied pressure on …. ohhhhhhhhhhh…the right spot.

Sliding two fingers inside her, she could feel his slow moves blindly feeling their way inside, rhythmically pumping but every time under the different angle. Her throat felt dry from gasping and the range of sounds from small mewls to screams. Clawing the sheets beneath her, hands still plastered to the mattress with charm. The pressure was rising inside like a huge tidal wave. She felt the edges of orgasm nearing her…and then…all was gone.

The pressure stayed; diminished, unsatisfied…nothing happened…he pulled back, completely. She released one disappointed whine. Almost instantly his fingers returned, pumping and rubbing, causing the deflating bubble to swell again. The nervous need was stronger this time; the desire to reach completion bigger and more imminent. Her throat felt like sandpaper. She could feel it, it was nearly there, her muscles started to tremble, strained to the point of snapping…he pulled back again…and she cried a frustrated cry, cursing him.

He just grinned, and started again, building a pressure inside again, making her skin ache from inside out, making her cry her throat raw. This time it was only a few strokes before she reached much-needed orgasm, he pulled back and she screamed at him, clawing the sheets. Rasp sound of ripped off material echoed through the room. Suddenly he was atop of her, sliding in. She purred at the feeling of fullness. Her hands were free and she wrapped them around his back same way she locked her heels behind his back, pushing, forcing him not to stop this time.

She could hear his grunts and hissing but all she could think of was the pressure and desperate need to release it. His hand found its way between them and she felt additional stimuli on her clitoris. The orgasm hit her suddenly and hard, she could freely say that in all her life she never felt it so strongly. Every nerve in her body flared like fireworks, the whole surface of the skin was tingling. Limbs twitching as her back arched over and over again. He didn’t stop, working toward his release through her orgasm, prolonging it. She barely started her decent from heights, when his orgasm triggered another wave of pleasure…

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Hermione stirred and grumbled in displeasure, Snape’s voice called her from great distance

\- Wake up. Miss Granger, we are expected in Grand Hall for dinner tonight. Wake up and dress up, I do expect you to respect school protocol! – his voice was stern and she jumped.

\- When did I fell asleep? – yawned

\- Four hours ago, I did manage to find what you were looking for; it is already in the laboratory. And I prepared everything for tomorrow morning, given that tomorrow is Saturday, and I do not have detentions…we can work all day without interruptions, I already instructed House Elves to send us food. Now get dressed. – he marched out of the room, she stirred again and recoiled feeling tendrils of arousal entangling her. Ignoring the ache, she dressed, grumbling “ _It is one thing to be…well…but this is ridiculous._ ” No, she won’t give him the satisfaction to see that she wants some more of what he gave her that afternoon. 

Discussing the next project stage, they climbed to the Great Hall, he was so focused on their work, and she was distracted to the point of screaming annoyance. The ache between her legs only got stronger, as they walked, and she focused mostly on not giving off the signs. She already had to use her, not often used, a push-up bra is the only one with firm, spongy cups that covered her erected nipples. Of course, she suspected that her rather prude attire looked somewhat as a sexy costume with her breasts beneath her chin, suspicion was confirmed with the looks she received from some younger staff members, not to mention several rows of seventh-years. The dinner was a torture, barely feeling the taste of food as she squeezed her thighs tight in an attempt to find some release.

\- Is everything alright? – he leaned to her, whispering in her ear, she nodded, finding that his scent and husky voice only added fuel to the fire.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Two days later, she was still in the state of perpetual arousal, initiating intercourse more often than she normally would, even at cost of possibility to set back their research. Severus, on the other hand, turned into an epitome of scientist engrossed in his research, diligently working, taking notes and spending almost all day above simmering cauldrons, completely focused. Hermione felt like she is going to explode.

They just had sex for the second time that evening, and she went to take a shower…fifteen minutes later she exited the bathroom annoyed, not quite sure at whom. She climbed in bed snuggling next to him, cuddling his thigh, he cleared his throat

\- Princess, as much as your behaviour is flattering, and my admission may have a bad reflection on me…I am not a young man anymore and thus bound by laws of nature. –

He was peering at her above the book he was reading, she huffed

\- I have no idea what is happening to me! – he arched one eyebrow – I am constantly aroused. –

\- I’ll take that as a compliment. – he cleared his throat hiding behind the book, but not before she caught the glimpse of a sly smirk

\- Severus Snape! What did you do to me? – he lowered his book again with a confused look on his face

\- Me? I find that insulting… - he started but she took the book, closing it – I was reading that… -

\- What did you do to me? – her face was just inches away from his – Tell me, before I lace…something…with Veritaserum and start interrogating you in front of everyone, in the Great Hall. –

\- Are you ready to go that far in tarnishing your own reputation… -

\- I do not see us as tarnishing mine anything, are you willing to risk it? At the point, I am rather desperate. – he observed her for a moment, leaning on the pillows finally

\- I am afraid that I cannot help you there; your reactions are your own. –

\- Reactions to **what**? –

\- You claimed you read some books… - his eyebrow arched again, challenging her – I wonder…well, at least we know… -

\- We know…what…? –

\- That you, my dear, are not ready to play. – his eyes shone, grin lingering on his lips, Hermione had a desire to hit him, to honesty, not in a good way, hurt him

\- Aha, and how do I solve this …problem? – growled

\- It will be solved on its own in a day or two if you do not prolong it… -

\- How? –

\- Do not… - he leaned to her whispering in her ear - …indulge yourself. – her skin crawled with goose-bumps, ache between her legs and throbbing in her clitoris getting stronger. She huffed and curled on her side of the bed, turning her back on him, grumbling “ _I’ll get you for this Severus, just you wait_.”  

\- Hermione… -

\- I don’t want to talk to you… -

\- Can I get my book back? – she growled and slammed the book at his chest, annoyed by his relaxed attitude.

He was reading and she pretended to sleep, focusing on her breathing rather than an uneasy feeling of need between her legs. Half an hour later, lights dimmed off, she heard him placing the book on the nightstand; his hands enveloped her dragging her closer to him, placing her head on his shoulder. He murmured something in her hair and she wished she could hear what he told her. Soft caress finally relaxed her enough to fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Want To Belong To You - Katie Herzig
> 
> Have I ever seen such kindness  
> Such resigned delight all in one glance  
> Right when you pass me  
> I watch, you see  
> You smile, I breathe  
> Air in my chest  
> I’m trying my best
> 
> The sun left me so quickly  
> I am stuck under the moon  
> I want to belong to you
> 
> I pray no one will find you  
> I’ll stay right where I am  
> ‘Til you come back  
> Don’t let me lose you  
> Before there’s a chance to begin
> 
> Suddenly light on my feet  
> With a sweet rearrange of the day  
> Everything’s changed now
> 
> One quick exchange  
> It’s not the same  
> Kind of goodbye  
> Gone with a sigh
> 
> The sun left me so quickly  
> I am stuck under the moon  
> I want to belong to you
> 
> I pray no one will find you  
> I’ll stay right where I am  
> ‘Til you come back  
> Don’t let me lose you  
> Before there’s a chance to begin
> 
> I wanna belong to you
> 
> I pray no one will find you  
> I’ll stay right where I am  
> ‘Til you come back  
> Don’t let me lose you  
> Before there’s a chance to begin


	16. Spellbinder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Be careful what you wish for..." - especially if you are not certain that you actually got what you wished for in the first place... or even worse if you think you did get exactly what you thought you will get. Sounds complicated, it is even more complicated for Severus...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Those two are not big on conversations, not the ones that are important, than again many couples are not, especially in the beginning of the relationship...

Severus put away quill and flexed his neck muscles, tedious task of grading essays appeared more like a torture now than it was before. Tossing a glance at the old clock on the shelf, sighed again, she is in the laboratory, working. Leaning back on the backrest of the chair and stretching legs under the table, he glanced at the note and smiled. She did her best in past twelve days, payback or rather attempt of it. 

Oh! She was far from weak or naïve in her attempt; in fact, she used every trick in the book, few highly creative out of the box tricks too. And if it was anyone else, anyone less…well…less…she would be victorious. Anyone weaker and poor sod would be crawling at her feet, but he already went to the hell and back with her. “ _It is funny with what you can learn to live, given enough time._ ” He already got used sporting an erection every time he thought of her, long before this past month. Not that he was immune, but a lifetime of self-control and head-start he had, gave him an unfair advantage.

In all honesty, he could have told her and stop all these little games, but it was so amusing, he enjoyed it. Her huffing and puffing and attempts amused him. Not only that she tried to “return the favour” but she really put an effort to get to him, even if it was for a limited time, never in his life a woman … Only a month left, one more month of absolute bliss, one more month before she rips his heart and walks away. The smile froze on his lips and brows furrowed, he couldn’t find anything to pull her in, anything that could hold her after the month passes.

Thinking about them, they were…what? Lovers? “ _What is the term kids using these days – friends with benefits?_ ” They are not friends, not even that. He could teach her…but was he willing to hand her the knife she’s going to use to carve him up? With a heavy sigh, he rubbed forehead. No, better not to think about it. “ _Life isn’t on your side, so when you are handed a bit of leeway do not question it – enjoy, while you can._ ”  

Warding the classroom and his office he walked into his private quarters. Removing his teacher's robes and frock coat headed to the laboratory, she was there and she looked enchantingly, so adorably beautiful. The dishevelled bun had her wand and three quills stuck in it, she probably attempted to subdue the curls into obedience using the items at hand, and still, curls sprang from all sides, making her look so…sexy. On the workbench, she had five rows of five cauldrons each made of different material, each row simmered at a different temperature. Twenty-five cauldrons were challenging even for him, challenging for controlling little less taking notes on subtle changes in various stages of brewing. Even five cauldrons would be hard to control, shook his head with a frown. He admired her dedication but lack of experience combined with overzealous nature can prove to be dangerous

\- Do you have the desire to destroy entire dungeon area of the castle? –  she raised head from her notes, skin glistening from fumes, bottom lip chewed up to the blood but her eyes lit up with subtle flame as she looked at him.  

\- No, I won’t damage your laboratory; though, you do need a ventilation of sorts in here. –

\- If one of these explodes I’ll need another quarters and place for my classroom. Are you aware that we are under the lake? One hole in the wall and I’m bound to start swimming to my classes. –

\- None of them will explode, I control them. And yes, I am aware that you are under the lake, windows do not open… - she trailed off, fumes above one cauldron turn orange and she runs to it, scribbling maniacally – I had to hurry up the process a bit, tomorrow we are called to lunch at Burrow. –

\- You tried to open the window – no matter how he tried, he could not hide horror in voice – May I remind you that all windows look at the lake? **Beneath the lake**. –

\- I know that…just slipped my mind for the moment… -

\- Burrow? – the second part of her sentence floated to his mind

\- You are not obligated to go, but you are invited… -

\- Then, you may convey my best regards to the Weasley’s -  

She looked at him, pull out her wand, causing few curls to slither down her neck and cast a stasis charm on the entire table, returning the wand in the bun approached him, still clutching muggle notebook and quill. As she approached, he noticed that one of the quills in her hear leaked black ink partially dying one of the curls. Hermione was a breath away from him; she used the feather of the quill in the hand to tickled it across his face, with seductive smile on her lips and in her eyes, pressing her body to his

\- …however, I’d love if you join me. – she finished her thought as if he didn’t interrupt it – Say yes, and I promise to make it worth the trouble…tonight and tomorrow evening. – his heart started to beat faster

\- Manipulation Princess? You **are** sorted into the wrong house. - 

\- I disagree. – her voice was husky – Given that you have a weak spot for Gryffindor women, I’d say I am sorted into the right house. – her lips touched his briefly – Let’s make a deal, I won’t force you… -

\- As if that would work – smirked and she gave him one “are you challenging me” look

\- … but, if you show up, I can promise you…you won’t regret it …later. –

\- Show up? -  he raised an eyebrow

\- Mhm, I must leave from here early and meet with Jenny, George asked me to bring her. – he frowned – She promised me, no more pranks. –  

\- Mhm. – he glanced at the workbench – Are you planning to continue working today?   -

\- No, it is late. Can we eat here? I’m knackered, and not in the mood to keep avoiding new Arithmancy and DADA teachers. – sly smile clashed with an innocent look in her eyes

\- You, Princess, are devious. –

\- You would be surprised what one can pick up if one starts spending time with Slytherin’s. -   

\- Apparently, that does not extend to proper stasis charms. – smirked at her waving his hand toward the workbench

\- Do you have any idea how sexy you are? -

\- Miss Granger, you are seriously overdue to visit Madam Pomfrey, I am afraid that fumes from so many cauldrons seriously affected your judging ability. –

\- Hmmmmmm, I just have to show you… - she smiled at him, kissed him and walked to the rooms. Feeling shivers running down his spine, he followed her. She was already under the showers and no matter how much he wanted to join her, he knew that she would benefit more from solo showering. Instructing the Elves to serve dinner in the small dining room, he sat on the sofa looking at the fire, lost in thought.

“ _Go to Burrow with her. No, not with her, but wait for her there…She does have a knack for complicating my life._ ” sighed “ _This would be the first time we are in social surrounding since…since all of this started._ ” His heart jumped, then sunk low. Not coming together was good, giving them distance. Was distance needed at all? After all, they were not … what? Item? Couple? In the eyes of all, they still were co-workers, a former teacher and student, master and apprentice. His heart shrunk in a painful lump, it was easy to pretend, to forget…hidden in his chambers, far away from prying eyes. He never stopped to think about what it would be like behind his door. It was easy to pretend in the Great Hall, by some unspoken agreement, they never showed even a trace of intimacy in front of the others, he wasn’t even sure if anyone knew.

His ruminations stopped abruptly when warm, soft and fairly wet witch straddled him, pressing her lips between his eyes

\- I won’t tolerate frowning, you know. – she whispered in his ear, nibbling it lightly – I missed you today. –

His hands clenched of their own volition. He felt her fiddling with his pants, not even surprised to find that he was already hard and ready, it seemed to be perpetual condition whenever she was near. Hermione, on the other hand, was in no mood for prolongation, taking him out of the pants through the fly opening; she guided him directly on her entrance. He growled in pleasure as she impaled herself, sheltering him in her moist heated tightness.

\- We can play later, I just need to…feel…- she whispered huskily and grounded her hips, moving them fast and sharp, clenching her muscles, tightening narrow space even more. He growled again, what she did take away his ability to think straight or at all. He moved his hands, unfolding the towel she still wore around her, and scooped her breasts, rolling the hardened dark pebbles between his fingers, pulling them slightly. She moaned, tossing her head back and speeding up grinding of her hips. Dew of sweat moistened her chest, it was obvious that she craved for release, but her frantic movements caused her to lose rhythm. He, lowered his hands, sliding them along the soft skin of her hips, digging the fingers into them, adjusting his position slightly he moved his hips up, meeting her thrusts on halfway. She moaned, digging her hands into his shoulders, locking her eyes full of undiluted lust with his.

He wanted to close his eyes, to focus and maybe last bit longer, but her gaze entrapped his. Hissing, he took over, setting a fast, sharp pace, plunging into her to the hilt, revelling in a still tight grip she maintained. Hermione was whining, with a look on her face that hypnotized him. Her muscles danced, and he speeded up, breath hitching in his chest. Her mewls turned to shriek of release, and he bit his lip to stop himself calling her name as her face spilt in front of his eyes. Hermione withered in his hands, breathing heavily, mumbling “thank you” into his shirt. Folding trembling hands around her petite form, he closed his eyes landing a soft kiss on the wet curls.

“ _You are an idiot Severus. The idiot who is not only about to jab a dagger in your own heart but also give it a good twist._ ” her breathing told him she dozed off, still straddling him “ _Then again, you always were idiot concerning love. At least now…you get a chance to taste it._ ”

But, in all honesty, he could not tell or even predict how he is to survive after their time runs off. For all he cared, it didn’t matter, in his mind, some things were worth eternity in hell or death, the real things, this time. Stubborn fiery witch, “ _My fiery witch._ ” in his arms charmed him, and he wouldn’t want it any other way, regardless of the consequences.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spellbinder - Foreigner
> 
> I found out the hard way, some things you just cant get  
> When I fell in love with a woman I wish I never met  
> I was in the wrong place, at the wrong time  
> I fell easy prey to an innocent way, I was so blind
> 
> I call out her name, I turn around to find her  
> She's a spellbinder
> 
> I've never been a easy man, so hard to please  
> But she made me feel life was unreal, oh Lord, how she satisfied me  
> I tried to break away, but I didn't stand a chance  
> She planned it so well, I was under her spell, I was in a trance
> 
> I call out her name, I turn around to find her  
> She's a spellbinder
> 
> Now do you know what love can do?  
> Oh no, what she puts me through?  
> It took so long for me to find her  
> Now she won't set me free  
> She's a spellbinder
> 
> Now do you know what love can do?  
> Oh no, what she put me through?  
> You say you can't believe, believe that it's true  
> Let the spellbinder put a spell on you


	17. If She Knew What She Wants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being in a relationship is quite different than knowing to properly explain what kind of relationship it is...especially to mutual friends. Severus and Hermione are at the Burrow..and thing just got more...complicated...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, this chapter was written last night (with a help of Tokaj wine ;) ) 
> 
> I can't promise you for certain that I'll manage another chapter tomorrow, in my country tonight is a Christmas Eve (still tons of work until evening) and Christmas day tomorrow (family day), I'll do my best but I just can't promise :)
> 
> Also, for next chapter, I have 2 different songs in mind so I have to decide whether I go with one or the other, which will influence more than a few things from that point on.

She sputtered the milk all over the dining table, coughing. 

\- Are you serious? Tell me you are joking! –

\- I am not joking, but I do start to question your table manners. – he replied, not even raising eyes from his plate

\- Why would I be…ashamed? If that is the case I would not… -

\- And pray tell, what would you tell them, how would you explain? – he kept eating without looking at her, and he had one point correct “ _What are we to each other? How can I break the news when I don’t know what the news is?_ ”

\- Ok so I didn’t work that part out, but still…Jenny knows. – he groaned at mentioning of Jenny’s name

\- She is a guest, not an active member of the wizarding community. Her knowledge of our…agreement…is irrelevant. –

\- SHE is my best friend! –

\- She is irrelevant to impact on your further career. –

\- And Molly, Arthur, Ron, Harry and Ginny, George, Bill and Fleur are? Neither one of them was overly supportive of it, so far. –

\- One more reason not to advertise… -

\- Advertise? I am not calling bloody Skeeter woman, we have a lunch with our friends! –

\- You don’t, but one of them might. – he finally looked at her, his eyes unreadable, face deployed of any emotion or tell-a-tell signs “ _True, Ron might, just out of spite._ ”

\- I don’t care, I am my own person capable of making my own decision, and I’m doing so for many years now. –

\- I am not arguing that. –

\- Are **you** ashamed? – thought never occurred to her before, but then again, she would never have dreamt of having this conversation either

\- Most certainly not. – he sounded almost offended – But I am the man, and not much of a reputation to protect, to boot. –

\- And we are in the 21st century. -

\- Technically… -

\- Don’t you even dare to finish, I am not interested in details, not at the moment. And it wouldn’t look good if you show up at Burrow with a black eye! – he raised eyebrow – As it happens, I have a bloody good hook, and if you don’t trust me, ask Draco! – she raised from table grabbing her jacket and backpack – I’ll see you at Burrow around noon…ish. –

Without another word, she stormed out of his…their…quarters. Rushed to the apparition point and apparated directly near the Leaky Cauldron, literary run through the inn and boarded the bus. Running up the four flights of stairs she was still fuming, pressing the doorbell with all her strength.

\- Where is the fire? – Jenny opened the door with a bemused look on her face – Troubles in paradise? –

\- I need a drink. – she huffed, following Jenny to the living room – The nerve of that man! –

\- Here. – Jenny offered her a tumbler of brandy – Now calm down and talk. –

\- He **advised** me this morning that it is smart not to mention…us…at the Burrow. –

\- And what is his excuse? –

\- Potential harm to my career, that I am the **woman** , my reputation, labelling. –

\- What labelling? -      

\- How would I present us… -

\- Well, how would you? – she blinked at Jenny

\- I don’t know? How can I tell you that when I don’t know what we are? –

\- You must admit, that is a valid reasoning. I met the Weasley’s, “fuck buddies” would not go well with them. –

\- Ok, you have the point, **he** has the point…but, all that is beside the point! – Jenny raised an eyebrow – I’m babbling again, aren’t I? –

\- Yes. –

\- I am just so happy, and I want to share it with people who are close to me. –

\- Herm, first sort it out **with him** where both of you stand and then share. – she nodded, of course, Jenny and Severus had the point – And how the things going besides unfortunate lack of … labels? –

\- Oh, Jenn! Sex is fantastic! -

\- Well since you didn’t end up on my couch in tears or with a desire to mangle him, that much is a given. I presume he didn’t run away this time. -  

\- That would be close to impossible, we are living in **his** quarters. He is just sooooo … uhhhhhh… I even used few tricks from the books you lent me. –

\- Herm, not all men are into that sort of things, don’t scare him off. I am not so convinced that you are either. –

\- I…I don’t know, for either of us. We are and we aren’t. I know I certainly like…well…things that are opposite of you. –

\- Herm, that is nothing to be ashamed of, and you can still like them and be quite vanilla about it. –

\- Vanilla? Never mind. He…confuses me. Apart from the fact that he literally put a timer on our time together, and that I have only one more month to find…something…anything to convince him that we stay together **after** I return to the Ministry and my apartment. I figured out that sex might be a …good starting point. That’s why I wanted to talk to you before today’s lunch. –

\- Let me hear. – Jenny pour them both another two fingers of brandy and sat across her, Hermione wrinkled her nose

\- He likes when I’m bossy in bed, but not too much. He also has some books, but I didn’t manage to read them yet. I figured that he might be into same as you are, but … –

\- But? –

\- What if he…if he is more … like me…and less … like you? I did joke about tying him up but… - she wrinkled her nose again

\- You tried to tie him up? With or without **his** consent? – Jenny sounded worried

\- No, well I joked about it, but… -

\- Honey, I won’t claim to know him, but…you know me, I can sniff them miles away… and I can tell you if you tie that man of yours, you better run, and hide before he manages to untangle himself. –

\- Mhm… Well he sort of has a thing for pain, so I’m not really sure where he stands. -

\- Sounds like the man for you, given your…proclivities. –

\- You are awful! –

\- Also, I am correct. Darling there are various degrees and reasons for that knack. Did you discuss it with him? What he likes and up to what degree? -

\- We didn’t talk about it, I sort of figured it out. When I scratch, or bite … turns him on more … but only during… I asked him about it and he did tell me that he needed something to “spark him up”. -  

\- Ok, Herm, you are aware that he does not have to be into kinky stuff for that and neither do you for that matter. –

\- And how can I know that, Ronald never managed to get me to the point to do something like that. Reginald… -

\- Still avoids even me. –

\- Well, I am not to blame that he doesn’t know what to do with real women. –

\- Point taken. Continue. –

\- Well, when I discovered that he has those books, I did that thing with…postponing…and massage…and he seem to like it. – Jenny nodded with a grin - Than he did something to me, it was **the best** orgasm in my life, and it was pure torture afterwards, I was horny for days, it was…aghhhhhh…and I tried to retaliate, unsuccessfully I might add. –

\- Ok. –

\- And then he told me I’m not ready. – she frowned – Jenn, I just want to understand. –

\- Well you certainly are not if you tried to…retaliate. Ok, did you try to talk to him? –

\- No, not really. He’s pretty closed off. We work and we…have sex. We have academic discussions, but we don’t talk about anything personal. He is not big on talking about…well about things before and during the war. But I do need something and that seemed like a … Besides, with enough literature I can learn the rules quite fast, and… –

\- Hermione, that world...it has written but also unwritten rules. In fact, every club has its own set of additional rules. I know that many from outside think that it is “anything goes” but it is far from it. If you want to try, go ahead I support you, but you must talk to him. You **must** set the rules and **follow** them, in any direction. –

\- As I said, he is a bit bottled up, but he would never hurt me. – she smiled – He did tie my hands once, I kind of liked it. –

\- With what? –

\- With dimittam[1] charm, it is developed during war, it is actually quite clever if bound person is in danger or scared the charm lets go, we used it to infiltrate… -

\- You are blabbing again. Ok, so he gave you the chance to stop everything if you start being uncomfortable. –

\- Ummm…seem so. –

\- He is the smart man. Just sit with him and talk. Promise me. –

\- I will. I wanted to ask you, can I borrow one of your corsets? –

\- Which one? –

\- Emerald one. –

\- I’ll give you the whole set. – Jenny stood up and she followed her, from the dresser Jenny dug up green under-bust with silver embroidery, matching thong and choker. – Here. – she rummaged at the bottom – Here, these shoes go well with that. –

\- Thanks, I’ll return it to you soon. –

\- Don’t hurry. If he likes it, keep it. I never wore it anyway, green is not my color. – her friend smiled at her – But do talk to him, and Herm don’t press it. –

\- I will. – she shrunk the items and placed them in backpack. – Shall we, he’s there and I want to be there before he changes his mind and goes home. –

\- I’m ready. –

\- Ok hold on to me, I’ll apparate us, just don’t tell anyone I did that. –

They hugged tightly and she apparated them in front of Burrow wards, walking the path she could see long bench table set in the garden, on the field next to it she could see Ginny and majority of Weasley men flying. Her heart quickened, Severus was sitting, rigid in posture, and watched them fly. She smiled at him and he stood up, bowing slightly. Harry was next to him, focused on fiddling with his broom and Severus smacked him on the back of the head, lightly, but Harrys head still twitched.

\- What? Oh! Hermione! – Harry jumped and run to hug her – I didn’t see you since the ball! –

\- Hermione! – came Ginny’s cry, redhead run to her tugging her in tight embrace

\- Gin, you stink. – she laughed

\- I know, sorry, I’ll go and take the shower. Hermione, did you know? Professor knows so much about Quidditch, but he didn’t want to play with us. –

\- Mrs Potter, I do not have the luxury of nearby showers, it was only smart thing to avoid activities that would result in need of it. –

\- I know Professor. I go take a shower, and I’ll tell mom you arrived. –

The rest of the Weasley men hugged her as well, and she laughingly complained how she needs shower after their heartwarming greeting. Soon Molly tottered outside the house, wiping her hands and smiling

\- Hermione! How are you my dear? Jenny, welcome to our home. –

Two hours later, she was in the kitchen, helping with the settings for lunch when Fleur glided next to her, adding her vegetables to chop for the salad, she leans to her

\- You and zi professor are together? How iz that like? –

\- Fleur? – Hermione blinked at the girl

\- I heard the George talking to the Genny. –

\- Ginny knows? –

\- No, the Genny, your amie. –

\- Oh Jenny! So, George knows… Look Fleur, we agreed we won’t talk to… -

\- Don’t talk, iz he… you know? – Fleur looked at her conspiratorially pushing one larger carrot towards her, she smiled feeling happy that at least she can talk about it with someone else besides Jenny. She pushed the carrot away and took one larger cucumber, winking at the French girl

\- Lucky. – smiled Fleur, two of them continued to work in silence, Ginny entered the kitchen

\- Fleur, mom wants you. – the moment they were alone Ginny leaned to her – Why didn’t you tell me? –

\- Tell you what? –

\- About you and Snape. –

\- Gin, I don’t know what are… -

\- I overheard Georg warning Fleur not to tell anyone, Jenny told him… -

\- Do you all eavesdrop on each other?

\- How else would we know anything about anyone? No one talks! – giggled Ginny

\- Who else knows? – she felt a pang of fear, how he would react if he finds out that so many people already knows

\- Besides three of us? I think mom suspects. Fleur probably told Bill, but he won’t talk. Percy, dad and Ron are oblivious, Harry as well. –

\- I’d like it to stay that way. –

\- But why? I think it is great! –

\- Gin! –

\- All right, but we have to meet for coffee and you have to tell me everything! I know you had a crush on him ever since the war. –

\- How… -

\- I am maybe younger than you, but I’m not a fool or a man, I know what means when woman blush after someone mention the name of the man she likes. – she winked – I happen to think you two are good match. Coffee, next week, and I want details. –

\- Gin… -

\- I am a married woman, you won’t make me blush. Promise. –

Ginny run out of the kitchen and she continued to chop with a smile, number of people who knew and approve was growing, that made her happy. Lost in the thought, daydreaming about last night she hummed a romantic tune.

\- You really are the sight, in the kitchen, singing… - Ron’s voice snapped her out of her reverie – ‘Mione… -

\- Ronald how many times I told you not to call me like that? –

\- Sorry ‘bout that. I wanted to talk to you…Look ‘Mione, I want to know, did you changed your mind? –

\- Ronald…we already had this discussion, no, I did not change my mind and **I won’t** change it.  –

\- ‘Mione, it is not good what are you doing, chasing career, living with the git in his dungeons. Is he treating you correctly? –

\- I’ll pretend you didn’t say that Ronald, and yes Master Snape is real gentlemen and grown man, something that I sadly cannot say about you. – she was mad now, and scared, realizing that Snape’s remark was not designed to insult her, but rather voice to possible public opinion. Suddenly, Ron hugged her, trying to land a kiss on her lips – Ronald stop, no! –

\- C’mon ‘Mione, let me remind you… -

\- There is nothing to remind me about Ronald, let me go before I hex you into the next week. – she demanded, pushing him into the chest

\- Just let it happen ‘Mione… - suddenly Ron was yanked away from her, Snape was standing behind, dangling him like a ragged doll by the collar of the shirt

\- Mr Weasley, you ought to learn that Lady’s “no” is always a “no”. – his voice dark and dangerous, with nearly murderous glimmer in the eyes

\- Let me go you… -

\- Ronald Weasley! – Molly’s voice echoed and Snape unceremoniously dropped Ron on the floor – I won’t tolerate that kind of behavior in **my** house. Go to your room and stay there. –

\- But, mum… -

\- Now Ronald. Hermione, dear are you all right, I’m so sorry. Severus, thank you. – Molly looked ashamed and worried, and she felt sorry for the woman, unconsciously inching towards Severus, slightly shaking.

\- Are you all right Miss Granger, we may leave if you desire so. – his eyes bore into hers with concern

\- I’m fine, Ron is just being git, that’s nothing new. Sorry Molly. –

\- It’s fine dear, he is my son but he is downright idiot. I’ll deal with him. Severus, can I bother you to stay with Hermione, just in case… I must prepare everything there… -

\- Do not worry Molly, I will take care of Miss Granger. –

She glanced at him, continuing to chop with unsteady hand, he placed his hand over hers, and pull out the knife

\- Are you honestly fine? We can leave… -

\- No, I am bit shaken up, but it will pass. Just stay, … near me, … please. – she hugged him, at that moment she didn’t care, she just needed to feel safe, and safest place in the world, for her, was his embrace. Slightly reluctantly, he folded his hands around her, petting her curls

\- As you wish. – he whispered.

 

[1] This is actually a charm I threw in, it is not connected to the cannon in any way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If She Knew What She Wants – The Bangles 
> 
> If she knew what she wants  
> (He'd be giving it to her)  
> If she knew what she needs  
> (He could give her that too)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> (But he can't see through her)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> He'd be giving it to her  
> Giving it to her
> 
> But she wants everything  
> (He can pretend to give her everything)  
> Or there's nothing she wants  
> (She don't want to sort it out)  
> He's crazy for this girl  
> (But she don't know what she's looking for)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> He'd be giving it to her  
> Giving it to her
> 
> I'd say her values are corrupted  
> But she's open to change  
> Then one day she's satisfied  
> And the next I'll find her crying  
> And it's nothing she can explain
> 
> If she knew what she wants  
> (He'd be giving it to her)  
> If she knew what she needs  
> (He could give her that too)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> (But he can't see through her)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> He'd be giving it to her  
> Giving it to her (giving it to her)
> 
> Some have a style  
> That they work hard to refine  
> So they walk a crooked line  
> But she won't understand  
> Why anyone would have to try  
> To walk a line when they could fly
> 
> No sense thinking I could rehabilitate her  
> When she's fine, fine, fine  
> She's got so many ideas traveling around in her head  
> She doesn't need nothing from mine
> 
> If she knew what she wants  
> (He'd be giving it to her)  
> If she knew what she needs  
> (He'd be givin' it too)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> (But he can't see through her)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> He'd be giving it to her  
> Giving it to her
> 
> But she wants everything  
> (He can pretend to give her everything)  
> Or there's nothing she wants  
> (She don't want to sort it out)  
> He's crazy for this girl  
> (But she don't know what she's looking for)  
> If she knew what she wants  
> He'd be giving it to her  
> Giving it to her
> 
> (He'd be giving it to her)  
> (He could give her that too)  
> (But he can't see through her)  
> Ooooooh, giving it to her  
> Giving it to her now


	18. I will shelter you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Weasley's lunch from Sev's POV

“ _Where the hell is she?_ ” Severus fumed, she disappeared in the house and he was left at the mercy of Potters and Weasley’s. Finally, his stoic, monosyllabic answers forced his hosts to back off and give him space. Potter’s separated themselves at one corner, far from him “ _Thank you, Merlin, for small favours._ ” Hermione’s Muggle friend and George whispered in the other corner. 

He observed the Muggle girl, he didn’t pay any attention to her at the Ball “ _To all honesty, the only thing I could see that night was - her._ ” After the… “ _kiss_ ” … he took a disliking of the girl, but she was her friend, so now he paid attention. Many confusing details, many pieces that didn’t quite fit; finally fell into the place. Hermione was passionate, fiery, determined and painfully blunt…her actions at the ball, some more subtle ways of seduction she used so uncharacteristic for her… he could understand them now. Watching the girl, the way she held her posture, “casually” touched George, everything she did…he nearly smiled – he knew the type. If by any chance this girl was a witch she would be placed in his house. But this…Jenny…she was more than that, her posture so relaxed still dominated the air around her and anyone in her vicinity. He was glad, Hermione had a true and honest friend in her – he was sure of it, Slytherin type was honest and loyal to the fault to their friends, the only problem was they trusted rarely to form such bond.  

Victorie padded to the field and he sighed, that was a painful reminder of generations to come and plague his existence.

\- Maman, why is ant Hemione westle uncle Jon? – asked girl

Weasley clan froze before any of them regained ability to react he was in the house, he could hear Molly in the background

-…this time let me deal with him. –

“ _This time…_ ” he noticed that “Golden Trio” drifted apart over the years, but didn’t press the question and she never told him anything related, now he was sorry about that. The sight in the kitchen blacken his vision, Hermione was pushing Ron in the chest, trying to maintain the distance.

\- C’mon ‘Mione, let me remind you… -

\- There is nothing to remind me about Ronald, let me go before I hex you into the next week. – she demanded

\- Just let it happen’ ‘Mione… -

In one long stride, he was next to them, pulling the little bag of manure up in the air, with one hand. He didn’t normally possess that kind of strength but adrenaline and anger pumped through his veins. Desire to crush the boy, like a bug that he was, spilt into the menacing words

\- Mr Weasley, you ought to learn that Lady’s “no” is always a “no”. – 

He was almost grateful that Molly showed up in the kitchen, he let his encumbrance on the floor, landing him in a heap. Suppressing tremors, he was fully aware that just a few seconds ago he was fully capable of murder, and not a hair above using any or all three Unforgivables. Hermione neared him slightly and he turned to her

\- Are you all right Miss Granger, we may leave if you desire so. – fighting a need to wrap her in his arms and shelter her, she looked traumatized but tried to cover it. Muffled through the rush of blood, Molly’s voice reached him

-… Severus, can I bother you to stay with Hermione, just in case… - she continued talking but he wasn’t listening anymore, all his attention focused on Hermione. He answered automatically

\- Do not worry Molly; I will take care of Miss Granger. –

Molly left them. Hermione gave him weak smile and turned to whatever she was chopping on the board, her hands shaking badly. Caution be damned, she needed support, he will deal with consequences, he will put out the fires as they appear. Taking a knife from her hands he turned her to face him

\- Are you honestly fine? We can leave… - she looked at him with huge puppy like eyes, trying to look brave and failing in the way that pruned his heart

\- No, I am bit shaken up, but it will pass. Just stay … near me … please. – she hugged him.

For a moment, he has frozen “ _What if someone shows up and see them? Damn all of them let them try and say a word. After this, today, they can only go stuff themselves…she **needs** me **now**._ ” If he learned anything in life, he learned not to hesitate and dwell on possible outcomes – but to choose the most optimal solution and deal with consequences. His arms folded around her, one encircling her waist, the other petting her curls.   

\- As you wish. – whispered, knowing that he would do anything, accept anything just to see her smiling again. “ _We are hugging! In the Weasley kitchen, no less!_ ” his brain screamed at him, they worked, they had sex accompanied occasionally with post-coital clench but…they never…hugged…until now.

Hermione clung to him like he was her lifeline, nesting her head on his shoulder, still trembling slightly. He continued to hold her and pet her hair, uncertain the if desire to kiss her, would be welcomed or worsened the situation. For a hug, he was sure that helps, not once he had to console crying teenage kids “ _One of the best guarded House secrets – I took good care of those kids, gave them support when they had none._ ” He could not remember how many times, crying girls and few boys even, dangled around his hand crying into his shoulder, forcing him to sit rigid and uncomfortable but giving them much needed support anyway. The problem was he didn’t know what to do beyond that hug, with kids that perceived him more as a father figure, awkward hug and a pat on the back was enough, but this…was not the same case. All he wanted was to kiss her, to make her forget all the bad things. For now, he just held her, and the time…stopped.

\- Hermione! What are you doing, hugging the dungeon bat? – Ron’s voice rasped through the kitchen. Hermione clenched to him, sticking her face into his chest, he tightened the hug, turning her away from the redheaded pest. Gorge and Ginny showed up, grabbing Ron, tugging him away. He glared at the Ron with murderous glee.

\- But George… -

\- They are an item you idiot, leave them be. – Ron’s jaw dropped off

\- And you better remember that **Mr Weasley** , next time you get the idea to force yourself upon her. – he growled, they finally dragged gaping Ron out of the kitchen, George sending him one apologetic smile

\- Sorry ‘bout that professor, he snuck out of the room. –

He could hear them conversing outside

\-  Tell me you are joking! – Ron’s voice was just a tad below shriek

\- No, I’m not. –

\- But, she is mine. –

\- Ronald Weasley, you two are not an item for years… - Ginny’s voice

\- Yeah, because she is bloody mental, wanting a career instead of kids. But we are going to… -

\- No, you are not. – Harry’s voice was determined – It is time to let go, Ron, I love you like a brother, but you are a womanizer and honestly mate, Hermione deserves someone better. –

\- And that is Snape? –

\- Given the choice… - voices dimmed as they moved further down the house. The doors squealed, he glanced just in time to see Jenny peaking in, seeing them in an embrace, she just smiled and disappeared.

The situation was getting more and more complicated, by the looks of things George and Ginny already knew and didn’t object. He was certain that she didn’t tell but that didn’t make things easier, on either of them. Harry was not openly against, and Molly also didn’t barge in, so, she either suspected something or/and probably accept it.  

Hermione stirred and he reluctantly loosened his embrace, she raised her face to him    

\- I am so sorry Severus. – her voice barely a whisper, cupping her face with her hands he drilled his eyes into hers

\- Whatever for? –

\- For all this, now they all know, and I know… -

\- I vaguely recall having a conversation about it this morning. – she smiled sheepishly – And if my memory serves, I remember telling you that general knowledge about…this…us…is something that can affect you more than me. For all I care, you can publicize it in every periodical you can think of, though I highly recommend against it. – her smile broadened, finally reaching her eyes – I won’t allow this to destroy your credibility or good public image. You may walk out tomorrow and I would still protect you. - 

\- I know. – there was such softness in her eyes, he lowered his forehead to hers.

Someone knocked on the door and they separated, but she still grabbed his hand and clenched it between both of hers, crushing his fingers. He ignored the pain

\- Yes? – Potter’s head peeked through the door

\- I’m sorry to bother you but… -

\- Come in, Potter. – he called, and young man “ _Oddly, that good for nothing piece of oversized dried carrot is still a boy in my eyes, but not Potter._ ”  stepped into the kitchen – Ron locked himself in his room and refusing to get out as long as two of you are here…. –

\- We will go… - started Hermione, and desire to blast in that room and rip the throat with his bare hands out of the selfish sod flared again, hearing the sadness in her voice

\- …Molly asked both of you to stay and have a lunch with family. Hermione, you are still part of the family, and if Ron can’t grow up and accept it, then he is a bloody git, it shouldn’t affect you. – turned to him with a half-grin – I forced Ron to a wand oath that he will keep quiet about your relationship, I added something extra to the oath, he will get Langlock every time he tries to tell anyone or nasty stinging hex every time he tries to write about it. -     

He separated himself from her, partially because his fingers started to lose circulation.

\- I will leave you two to talk. Potter... – he landed a soft kiss on her curls

\- Don’t worry Sir, she’ll be safe. -  nodded to the Potter and left the kitchen, but stayed at the door to listen “ _Old habits die hard, I guess._ ”

\- Hermione…? –

\- I don’t know what to tell you, we are still not quite sure what we are or how long it will last Harry. –

\- How are you? –

\- I’m happy, that is all I know. I was unhappy for so long…I…don't question it. I’ll enjoy it while it lasts. –

\- Then I am happy for you. –

\- Thank you for understanding Harry. –

\- I don’t understand, to be honest, but I won’t oppose to anything that makes you happy. –

He smiled and walked away, it was important that she has Potter’s support “ _He did grow up in a decent young man._ ” Taking a deep breath, he entered to the winter garden, Molly rushed towards him and he prepared for barrage

\- Severus, tell me that you two are staying. –

\- I believe that Potter managed to persuade Miss…Hermione. – there was no point in titles and pretending anymore

\- Good. I want you to know, you two have our support. – she patted him on the cheek and stormed off. Approaching the bench, George caught up with him offering a tumbler of Ogden’s

\- Thank you, Sir, - Weasley grinned, with the corner of the eye he noticed that Harry and Hermione came to the garden but Fleur and Ginny cornered her instantly – for not killing my git of a brother. –

\- I did not think that Molly and Arthur would take it kindly if I did. – drawled

\- After what he did…I’m not sure if they would complain about it either. Mum was quite near to killing him herself. – the kid cried from the back of the yard and he smiled – Sorry, Sir. My time to babysit... –

He continued towards the bench, but only a few steps later female voice addressed him

\- Master Snape, may I have a word with you? – he turned to face Hermione’s Muggle friend, she was smiling at him “ _What now?_ ”

\- Miss…? – he didn’t know her last name

\- Jenny. Jenny is just fine. I trust you know that your…arrangement…is not news to me. – he nodded, wondering where she is going with this, she used “arrangement” instead of relationship “ _How much does she know?_ ” – I know it’s not my place but…I’d like to offer you a word of advice, as someone who knows Herm better and longer than anyone here, including you. –

\- Is that so Miss Jenny? –

\- I believe it is. You may say that I am Hermione’s confidant. – she smiled sweetly

\- Is it smart then, to betray her trust? – he raised an eyebrow, it had no effect on a woman in front of him, she just smiled and rolled a glass between her fingers

\- Who says I will? – she challenged him

\- If you are confident…I would hate to see Hermione losing another friend over slip of a tongue, no matter how good intention was. –   

\- She won’t. My tongue never slips…unintentionally. – he nodded and the woman smiled again looking at her drink, she took a small sip and looked him in the eyes – Hermione lives in books. – “ _Tell me something I don’t know_ ” – So much so, that unwritten word often eludes her. She also doesn’t talk. -  he raised his eyebrow again – Not really, not about things that matter. I trust that you will be the one to notice and address any issues that arise, because…she won’t. – “ _Still, nothing new._ ” – I don’t want to see any of you hurt because of of…misunderstandings…or…lack of **rules**. – “ _Now this is new, how much of a confidant she is to Hermione?_ ” – Oh! And may I ask you to tell Herm, George will take me home, I don’t want to impose on her after what happened. -  

\- I will gladly convey your message. Thank you for the advice, Miss Jenny. – he felt he is breathing little easier, fear of letting Hermione walking her friend home and then back to Hogwarts alone was nagging him from the moment he saw Ron molesting her in the kitchen.

\- You are most welcome. – she smiled and glided away.

He finally reached the bench and sat on it contemplating on Jenny’s words “ _What did Hermione tell her?_ ” he could read between the lines, the girl was Slytherin through-and-through.

\- What did Jenny want? -  

\- To give me her official…blessing…of sorts, I think. – he looked at her, she was much calmer.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Hours later, after surprisingly pleasant and relaxed lunch he was standing next to Hermione, she looked tired.

\- Shall we go home, Princess? –

\- Yes. – she yawned, covering her mouth

After short goodbye’s they walked toward the apparition point behind the wards. He hugged her tightly and apparated them to the Hogwarts gates hoping with all his might that she did not notice his…slip of a tongue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Will Shelter You - Bob Carlisle
> 
> I'm in your corner  
> Don't worry 'bout a thing  
> And if you should ever need  
> Some comforting  
> I'm as close as the air you breathe  
> I'll be the faith you need to believe
> 
> Put your head on my shoulder  
> And rest a little while  
> 'Cause I'm here to hold you  
> When your world turns wild  
> That's just what love should do  
> When times are tough  
> I will pull you through
> 
> When the hurricane blows  
> Against your heart  
> And the sky's on fire  
> And you don't know where you are  
> When you've done all you can do  
> And there's no one else to turn to  
> I will shelter you
> 
> It doesn't matter  
> What tomorrow brings  
> 'Cause baby together  
> We can weather anything  
> When you can't seem to  
> Find your way  
> I will push back the storm  
> I will stop the rain
> 
> No matter where you are  
> I will guide your heart


	19. Heaven only knows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a bit of smut and fluff ... the right way to end a bad day.

It was a quarter to five, sitting next to the roaring fire, barefooted, in old sweatpants and even older Iron Maiden T-shirt, Severus felt relaxed. It took a long shower and a glass of lemon-vodka to finally calm him down after today’s events. They returned to Hogwarts almost hour ago … 

… _Hermione looked like she is going to fell asleep on her feet, and even if he had his suspicions that occurrences from today were not the first time she had to endure, for some reason she looked traumatized. Sending her to bed was the best he could do, knowing all too well that sleep can help if one could have it after he suffered through the shock._

_While she might be able to sleep through remnants of today’s events, he didn’t grant himself same luxury. It was a long time since he felt like he did today – the impulse to truly end one’s life without a shred of remorse. He opted for a long shower, allowing hot water to wash away his anger. He knew how to deal with those impulses; one did not go through what he had without ending up damaged, but also with knowing how to control those urges…_

…With book in his hand, finally feeling like himself, he just enjoyed relaxing Sunday afternoon, when flames turned green and Minerva’s head popped out of the fireplace

\- May I come in Severus, we need to talk. – he looked at her head, stifling the growl “ _So, the rumour mill started to turn, I was hoping for a little bit more time._ ”

\- As if I could stop you, Minerva. – one of the downfalls of not being Headmaster was that he didn’t have control over Floo network, Minerva stepped into the room, dusting the sod on his carpet

\- Keeping the elves busy Minerva? – he clipped, Minerva looked at him over her glasses, scanning his choice of clothes

\- Should I even ask Severus… - she raised eyebrows looking at the picture of Eddie giving the finger and moon-shining words “Maiden rule” through the windshield

\- Only if you have the desire to discuss my taste in Muggle music. – he drawled “ _First time since forever I decide to relax and of course, she chooses that moment to show up and criticize my attire._ ”

\- How is Hermione? –

\- Sleeping, after today’s events, and I’m presuming that you are here because of that, the best remedy is rest. –

\- In your bed or hers? – “ _Straight to the point._ ”

\- Is that important? – he raised an eyebrow – Given that I’m sitting here talking to you? –

\- You are correct; it is none of my business. –

\- For someone who has no business to meddle, you ask rather straightforward, meddling, questions. –

\- You can blame me for being concerned. – her voice tightened and he gave her one of his “I told you so” looks – Don’t get me wrong Severus, I am not worried about school’s reputation, or yours for that matter. Not even about hers. As you may very well know, as educators we try to stay distanced, but every once and a while we have students we start to care deeply about. In my career, I had two, and I am always worried about them. – 

\- Is there a point behind all this chit-chat Minerva or we are just wasting time? –

\- I just wanted to make sure both of you are fine. –

\- As you can see… -

\- Molly was also worried… -

\- No need to be concerned Minerva, I may not be a social butterfly but I certainly know how to deal with trauma physical and psychological. Miss Granger will be fine. –

\- Is she that to you, Severus? Miss Granger? –

\- **That** , Minerva, is **none of your business**. – 

\- It **is my business** , as your employer, it is my duty to see that school rules are not broken. But, I am aware of the situation, and certainly, do not desire to meddle between two consenting adults. –

\- You force me to repeat myself, **why** are you wasting **my free** time? –

\- For one I want to know can I count on you this year for Valentine's dance? –

\- It is my duty as a member of the staff. – he sighed – Not the one I enjoy, but none the less. –

\- I could put you to the ballroom shift this year… - she sounded hopeful

\- And risking mass deduction of point through the houses? No thank you, patrol duty suits me fine. –

\- Very well. –

\- Is that all Minerva? I would like to return to my reading… -

\- That is all, thank you for your time, Severus. – her voice sounded heavy and rather sad. Watching her leave he sighed, he knew that Minerva tried to reach to him, ever since the war. He did not hold any resentment towards the woman for her behaviour to him during the war, but he also didn’t want closeness with her or anyone for that matter. Hermione seemed to breached through the walls he carefully placed around him, but that was another day’s problem.

Current problems revolved, firstly, around the fact he was just reminded of – Valentine’s Day…was he expected to give her a …gift? Is their…whatever they had…qualified as gift giving connection or not? The second problem was remaining time they had together and how to… Muffled cries reached him from the room, instantly he was on his feet and rushed to calm her down.

Hermione was tangled in sheets, crying, defending herself from something or someone. He climbed to the bed and called her softly 

\- Princess… -

She cried in terror and curled into the ball, mumbling incoherently. He touched her carefully, not knowing if physical contact would cause more traumas or to shush her, making shushing sounds. She backed away and he retracted his hand, swearing silently.

\- Princess, you are safe. You’re safe. – he whispered, and cries turned to whimpers, her hands still flexed – You’re safe, relax. It’s just a dream. –

\- Severus… - a stream of tears run down her cheeks and he leaned to her, careful not to touch her, whispering        

\- I’m here Princess, taking care that nothing bad happens to you. You are safe Hermione. – she stretched her arm and touched his face, lowered it to the shirt and grabbed a fistful of material, deeming it safe he encircled his arms around her and dragged her closer to him. She clung to him, burying her face in his chest, cries turned into inconsolable sobs. – Shhhh, it’s all right, I’m here. You are safe. My witch, my fiery witch... –

Finally, she stopped crying and calmed down, hugging him, tucking her head at his shoulder, nuzzling her nose next to his neck. He pulled her as close as it was possible and remain to lie on the bed, rocking her gently, listening to her breathing. So many bad decisions from the past, not only his, haunted him. “ _Merlin, what have we done? She didn’t deserve this, none of them did._ ” Squeezing her tight next to him, he sighed, he would give anything if he could save her from bad memories and dreams. She tightened her hold of him and smiled, sighing deeply, relaxing next to him. “W _e are hugging again!_ ” the thought surprised him “ _I could get addicted to this._ ” Careful not to wake her up he snuggled next to her, inhaling her scent, just…existing in the moment…letting the time slip by them.

Later that evening, she finally woke up, raised her head blinking at him

\- You had a nightmare. –

\- So, you decided to snuggle. –

\- It seemed to work. –

\- And you stayed by my side because…? – her voice was soft and sleepy, making him shiver

\- Because, Princess, you have the propensity to turn into a Devils Snare once you get your grip on someone. – teased her – And, I didn’t mind if that meant that you will get your rest. - 

\- You are an original knight, my good Sir. – she smiled

\- If I can provide, at your service Milady. – she snuggled her face into his neck, not even attempting to untangle herself from him

\- Can you make me forget? –

\- I can Obliviate you. – she giggled, slithering her hand to his abdomen

\- I had something else in mind, equally effective. – she whispered in his ear, moving her hand even lower

\- I can be of some service, I think… - he pulled her closer, dragging his hand beneath the shirt and pressing it on the small of her back

She tossed the covers and started to laugh

\- I should have guessed…Iron Maiden? Nice shirt… -

\- I believe that Minerva does not share your enthusiasm. –

\- Minerva saw you in this shirt? I wish I could see her face… -

\- There is always a Pensieve… - he found out that he liked this…new…teasing…cuddling…whatever this was. Her eyes smiled, then, just for a moment became panicky and shifted back to smile again.

\- As much as I like your choice of … clothes… I want you out of it. – she kissed him briefly, tugging his shirt, he sat in bed to help her remove his and her shirt. She was undressing them almost frantically, but today he…had something else in mind.

Pulling her down on the bed and leaning over her, capturing her lips, he let his hands roaming over her skin, grazing most sensitive parts but not directly touching them. Swatting her greedy lite hands away from him, for what he had in mind he needed all the strength he can muster to control his own urges.

\- Severus….! – she whined impatiently

\- Shhhhh Princes, let me show you something. – whispered in her ear.

Hermione shivered and relaxed, surrendering. His lips leached onto hers, in series of small shallow kisses, following the outline of her lips, lingering slightly at the corners. She started to breathe in broken gasps. His hands still roamed over her, causing a sea of goosebumps to follow the trail his fingers drawn. Pulling back, he turned her so that she was leaning her back against his chest, her hands twisted to reach his hair, giving him full access to her breasts. Toying with erected nipples gently, until she pressed her behind to him. He ground his hips, allowing her to feel his erection, she moaned, low guttural moan, full of need.   

Pressing his lips on her neck, licking on the sweetly pulsating beat, sneaked his hand to her folds, making small circular moves. She was beyond ready, slick from the juices her body profusely provided. Guiding one of her legs over his hip, he adjusted his position a little, and guided his shaft to her entrance, teasing her.

\- Severus … stop toying…. – she cried between the moans, pushing her pelvis back at him.

He guided himself in her shelter, pushing slowly, allowing her to notice and enjoy the benefits of the position. Albeit, this position could be bit uncomfortable but he did all he could for her, not to feel discomfort. From this angle, she appeared to be even tighter than she was, he could feel every ridge and fold inside, deep inside her. Hermione mewled at the sensation, pushing toward him, pressing harder to his chest. He set a slow, but steady stroking rhythm, pulling back almost completely and going into the hilt. One hand toyed with her breasts, the other played with, now, swollen and hardened nub, his lips never separating from the skin of her neck.

The sensation was maddeningly magnificent, her tightness and heat exquisite. She fisted his hair, scraping the scalp and he had to subdue the urge to go faster. “ _Don’t do that Princess, help me out here._ ” As she could read his thoughts, she stopped with scratching and just relaxed, mumbling and moaning, begging him to go faster. He could feel her muscles tighten, and he knew she is close. By now he was so attuned to her body that every tremor, every sigh was a guiding star, a tell-a-tell sigh how close she was or what she needed. Now, she was close, but he maintained the same rhythm as before, basking in the tremors of her slow building orgasm and her free, loud cries.

When her walls gripped him, in a frantic ripple, he hissed. She cried tensing her body and he still, letting her relish in the feeling. Her orgasm seemed like it’s going to last forever, tremors and spasms waining just so that repeat with renewed strength. Through all this he just held her close, drawing the satisfaction from her pleasure rather than from his own completion. Finally, she relaxed in his arms and he pulled back from her. She looked at him with dazzled, unfocused eyes and smiled groggily

\- What about you? – he just kissed her – I won’t have that… - she mumbled, shakily crawling down

\- Hermione… - 

\- Shush, my turn. – she commanded with a voice still raw from her cries “ _Merlin, she sounds soooooo sexy._ ”

Feeling her small hand squeezing the base of his member, he propped to elbows looking down at her. She was still unstable and weak but determined, pink tongue peeked through swollen lips and she licked the tip, making him hiss. Hermione locked her eyes with his and continued to lick. Losing strength, he flopped back on the bed, closing his eyes, the picture of Hermione eating that banana month earlier came to mind. What she was doing to him now, wasn’t much different; she meticulously licked every available part of the skin, cleaning the precum and her juices from his shaft. He growled, then moaned as she swallowed him, taking as much of him as she could in her mouth. Her mouth, wet and heated bobbed and sucked, her tongue flicking at ridges and folds, his hips buckled on their own accord. Few more strokes of her hand accompanied with bobbing and licking and he couldn’t hold it anymore, bucking his hips and releasing his load into her mouth. She finally released his sagging member and crawled back to him.

Hermione kissed him, tucking her head into the crook of his neck, entangling her limbs around him and mumbled

\- I could get used to this… - her voice trailing off as she drifted to slumber, he kissed her forehead whispering

\- So do I love... -

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heaven Only Knows - Richard Marx
> 
> I watch the world go round and round  
> And my life goes by at the speed of sound  
> I walk the night  
> And I wonder just where I belong, oh
> 
> My heart is young, but my soul is old  
> I've never been one to do what I was told  
> My back to the wall  
> Is the only place I can feel strong, oh
> 
> [Chorus:]  
> Heaven only knows what lies before me  
> Heaven only knows what all my searching is for  
> All my life I've waited for a miracle  
> But I can't ask for anything more
> 
> I like to think I'm a faithful man  
> To resist desire, I do all I can  
> I hope to die in the arms of the woman I love, oh
> 
> [Chorus]
> 
> I've always wondered how to know right from wrong  
> Looking for a reason to replace what is gone  
> But somehow the road just seems to lead right back to me
> 
> [Chorus]


	20. My Valentine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valentine day's gifts and celebrations Hermione's and Sev's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be posted on the 9th, for Snape's b-day - but work and all the little RL things interrupted me until date slipped off to another day....well at least you know why is this chapter longer than the others. 
> 
> Also, it is time to bring this to an end, so few more chapters to go. It is hard to write two stories at once ( a mistake I won't repeat anytime soon or ever), so I'm wrapping up this one before I return to the other story. :)

Hermione was bored out of her wits, she didn’t want to be here, little less to run and hide from persisting new DADA teacher, “respectable” Mr Tipit “ _Idiot!_ ”. Self-proclaimed “authority” on Dark Arts “ _Mr “hero” who run and hid during the war, to another continent no less. Our first-years know more about Defense against Dark Arts than this Lockhart-wannabe._ ” She could understand Minerva for hiring him, even if the curse was lifted; there wasn’t many of them lining up to be DADA professors. 

She hid in the alcove and looked at the sadly hanging rose bushes, Severus already passed through that part of the garden – obviously. She smiled, something between them changed, shifted after that day at Burrow, after that night… 

… _when she woke up, the fire was low in the heart, he was reading leaning on the headboard of the bed and she was using his stomach as a pillow._

_\- We are snuggling again. – she blurted dozily_

_\- If you qualify this as … snuggling. I am not overly familiar with the rules… - he peered at her over the edge of the book, then closed the book and place it on the bedside table, he looked uncomfortable…to her astonishment Severus Snape actually looked…uncomfortable. She sat next to him_

_\- Severus, what’s wrong? –_

_\- What happened today … at the Burrow … - started with quiet, almost trembling voice, **avoiding** her eyes_

_\- I am truly sorry Severus. –_

_\- I am not talking about them knowing, I was referring to the Ronald Weasley’s behaviour… how… how often…. –_

_\- Ever since I left him. – she nearly sighed with relief – He insisted I don’t go for my NEWT’s after the war, in the end, he had no choice but to play along. When I choose mastery, he lost it, insisting that I “call my wits” and just marry him. He actually used his mother as an example of a woman I should be. It was a nasty brake-up; Harry kept it out of the media. Every now and then he tries to persuade me to marry him. –_

_\- Do you want to? –_

_\- Odd question from a man I had sex with just a few hours ago. –_

_\- Perfectly sensible question, Princess. Sex and love do not always go together. You marry the man you love, not necessarily the one you have sex with at present time. – his face was calm and voice soft but emotionless, she wished for the millionth time for the ability to read him._

_\- I agree, the thing is…I am not in love with Ron. I am not convinced that he is in love with me, any more than I am at him. Ron is a “news whore” and all the news **predicted** **us** as married, I’m spoiling his reputation with my refusal to do what everybody expects us to do. – _

_\- What happens after you return to the Ministry? –_

_\- He will continue. Ron is a brilliant strategist, he is not stupid…at some departments…but he can be rather thick, come to interpersonal relations, and spoiled selfish prat. – she didn’t want to lie to him, but she did worry what his reaction might be. He declared her 'his' in front of Ron, basically placing her under his protection… Her being protected by Severus could not end up well for Ron._

_\- If I may propose…after…you return to the Ministry, - she noticed that he avoided saying after their time is up – and you are still perused by the **idiot** , you may freely continue to claim… - _

_\- Thank you, but I don’t think that would be necessary. However, I do appreciate the offer. – she kissed him on the cheek, fighting the tears away – I can handle Ron, most of the times. –_

_But, after that – they changed. There was more…intimacy, not just hot, mind-blowing sex, but real intimacy. They hugged, they kissed more…it started to look more like a real relationship than agreement…as they finally both agreed on unfortunate and heart-ripping term…_

… - Ah, Miss Granger, there you are! – she shivered, her skin crawled at the sound of Mr Tipit’s voice – I was looking for you! –

\- Why? – “ _I know you moron, that’s why I’m hiding._ ”

\- I wanted to ask you to lunch… - “ _So, he finally found the courage…good, carts are on the table._ ”

\- Mr Tipit… -

\- Please, call me John, Hermione. –

\- **Miss Granger** to you **Mr Tipit**. I am not interested in lunch, dinner, breakfast, or any form of socializing with you. In fact, I am **most definitely not interested** to be seen or associated with a “glory hunter”. And I would appreciate if you stop pestering me. –

\- And what kind of a man do you look for **Miss Granger**? –

\- A **real man** , something of an extinct species these days. Honest, upstanding, true, loyal man, which would not seek me out just so he could sell me to the press for 1 minute of glory. – she spat – And **that** does not include **you**. If you excuse me. –

Storming out of the hall, she briefly stopped to notify Minerva that she has a headache and leaving the party. She wanted to go early anyhow, Severus was on duty for another 30 to 40 minutes and she needed time to prepare, she had a special gift for him tonight.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Emerging out of the shadow, from the other side of the alcove wall, Severus sighed. He was glad to hear her brushing off that moron of a DADA teacher, but her words “ _honest, upstanding, true, loyal man_ ” stung, he could not provide what she was looking for. Making another round through the magically warmed garden, he blasted few more rose-bushes and deducted more points from various houses.

Making the third round he found Minerva waiting for him near the entrance to the Hall

\- Severus…, may I have a word? – he nodded – It is an almost end of your shift and I’ll ask someone to cover for remaining few minutes… - 

\- What is going on Minerva? –

\- I am worried about Hermione. – she paused, but he continued to look at her not giving in to the urge to shake the answer from the woman – She complained about a headache and stormed off. –

\- She was annoyed by Mr Tipit’s constant pestering. They had alteration near the garden wall, I happened to be near and hear part of the argument. –

\- Oh, my’! Is she… -

\- Apart from a headache, she is. Then again the conversation with Mr Tipit tends to have that effect on all who have an intelligence higher than an average pea plant. –

\- Severus…! –

\- Minerva, the man should go with a warning, if you converse with him often he may cause permanent brain damage or at least migraine. – drawled

\- Yes…, well in any case…I would feel much better knowing that you are with her. – he looked at the woman and nodded

\- Very well, I will take the longer route through the grounds and see if someone had…ideas…on my way. I’ll see you tomorrow Minerva. – 

Turning on his heel, he walked away. Stepping outside the enchantment that warmed the gardens, cold winter air bit his overheated cheeks; he was in ankle deep snow. Pacing slowly towards the dungeon entrance over the idyllic field, which glittered like a field of diamonds on the shy winter moonlight he wished that she is here with him. He wanted to share this…beauty…in front of him with her. Stopping in his tracks he grabbed a handful of snow and melt it in his arms, rubbing the cold wet hands over his face and clasping them on the back of the neck. “ _You are just an old fool, deluding yourself. You accepted to be used, in two more weeks she will be gone. Gone from the school and gone from your life. Play the part as you meant to…_ ” But last two weeks melted any reservation, any distance he might maintain between them.

Reaching his quarters, expected to see her in the living room, reading or pacing. She was not there. He went to the laboratory, maybe she tried to distract herself with work, but laboratory was empty as well. “ _Maybe she just wanted to sleep through the night._ ” He walked to the bedroom, contemplating on how to give her a present, in the end, he decided that he did want to give her something. So, he found her a book, very old and rare tome he knew she was trying and failing to find. He reached his shadier connections, ones he knew she didn’t even reconsider. The book was concealed in his dresser drawer now. If she sleeps, maybe he will just leave the book next to her and let her rest.  

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Hermione tried to draw a deep breath and failed. “ _This is torture contraption._ ” However, she was willing to endure the bite and the squeeze of corset, and tight grip of the choker “ _Rightfully called so._ ”, especially after she glanced at her reflection in the mirror. She was accustomed to thong’s, even if she never saw them as a valid piece of clothing. Her attire was accompanied with a pair of silk muggle self-holding stockings, she just coloured the sticky lace into corset colour with silver trim, and shoes Jenny gave her. Twelve-inch stilettos, she nearly broke her ankle trying to walk in them from the bathroom to the bed. 

She heard him entering the quarters, walking around, looking for her. This was her last chance, the very last card she could play, and if she played it right then maybe she will gain footing for what she really wanted. So, positioned herself, the same way she saw in one of the books, she sneaked out of his dresser the other day and waited. He entered the room and froze, his hands flexed, his body twitched, his face was a mask, but his feet seem to be plastered to the floor. Her heart started to pound in her throat “ _Does he like it? Oh Gods, what if he doesn’t like it?_ ”  She forced a smile and almost whispered

\- Happy Valentine. – he was still standing at the doorstep, petrified and mute, they just stared at each other for the longest of time, her face fell – I’m sorry, you… -

He was next to her in a blink of an eye, voice deep and dark

\- You look gorgeous. – he kissed her – Hermione, we have to talk. – she felt like crying “ _It is over, I lost him._ ”

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Walking into the room he was…” _Stricken by lightning, now I understand it…_ ” Hermione was a vision, dressed in his house colours, even if he was fiercely loyal to his house, colours never played much of an importance to him, but this emerald green was pronouncing her pale complexion perfectly. Her perfect breasts fell over the edges of the underbust, slightly parted with the tip of the bask. Her thin waist, pronounced even more and her hips hidden with green and silver. She was the embodiment of perfection. The green line of silk marked skin toned stockings and he could see her feet in high heel stilettos, those two items blurred his vision. 

Forcing himself not to…overreact…clenched his fists, fighting his body’s urge to…” _Merlin, give me strength._ ” His first impulse was to reach her, turn her over on all four, move the offending material and…just fuck her…over and over again, until she forgets her own name…or he forgets his. Breathing slowly, struggling to put himself under control, he just soaked picture in front. Finally, he could react at least semi-normal.

Only then he noticed an item in front of her and shallow, almost laboured breaths she tried to cover. He made slight move, but then she whispered

\- Happy Valentine. – he froze for the second time that evening “ _For me...She did that…for me?_ ” No one ever tried to…, made an effort to…, no matter how misplaced her attempt was, she dressed like this…for him.  All of a sudden, she looked immeasurably sad and her quiet voice trembled - I’m sorry, you… -

Moving next to her, fast, he swore silently. She surprised him so much so that he probably could pass as one of the statues in a hallway. Capturing her lips, murmured

\- You look gorgeous. Hermione, we have to talk. –

\- No, I understand, it was just…right…me being silly and wanting to… - 

\- Hermione. – she stopped looking at him “ _You are bloody idiot Severus, stop tripping over your own words before you make her cry._ ” He took her hand and guided it over the intumescent material of his trousers, she blinked – You…just surprised me, rendered me speechless…which is feet on its own. You are gorgeous, a vision…but we do need to talk. –

\- But…I thought that you… -

\- Princess, you are too perfect, too gorgeous even without all this. Like this, there is no man who could resist you. I do…and…I will…later, but first, we need to talk. And we need to get you out of that corset. –

\- But I thought… -

\- No matter how much I’d like to…having a partner who fainted due to a lack of oxygen…can be...anticlimactic. – she smiled weakly, he took her hand and guided her off the bed – So, I’m going to enjoy a different show. You will remove the corset, but you may leave everything else. – grazing choker with a finger he raised her chin – You will wait until I set myself comfortably on the bed, and then you will remove it for me…slowly…will you Princess. –

She nodded, swaying on her high heels; remind him on a foal learning to walk. Turning his back to her he finally let the silent sigh, now he understood her friend’s warning, they really need to talk. He propped the pillows and leaned on them, twirling the item she chose in his hand, giving her a slight nod. Allowing the heat, he felt, to linger in his eyes, she needed reassurance and he would be damned not to give her one.

He watched as she cast a charm, slowly releasing the silk cord on the back until she could easily unbuckle the corset, his eyes soaked every inch of skin that appeared, liberated from silk confinement. Finally, she slipped the corset off and place it on the chair, climbed to bed, wincing. He spread his legs for her to climb between and leaned her carefully on his chest.

\- Does it hurt? –

\- How did you …? –

\- Because, the corset will do that to you, especially if you are not accustomed to wearing it. –

\- I can feel my bones move to their place, painfully. - she frowned and he chuckled, nodding – Too bad, I wanted to be… -

\- Princess, you are beautiful without an effort, you do not need…additions…to make you pretty. And next time, please, talk to me…instead sneaking around and trying to learn about everything from books. –

\- As if that’s gonna happen, me not learning from books… - she snorted

\- I should restrict your access to my dresser. And, if you chose to talk to me, you would know…that this, - he twirled riding crop in front of her - I use to its original purpose, which is horseback riding. Even then, this is just for show; I could never hit an animal with this little less human being, and most certainly wouldn’t leave marks with this on your lovely skin. In case that you had another idea, Merlin helps the one who raises a hand to me, with or without this in it. –

\- It was not meant for you! – she rebelled and gasped almost instantly – It was for me…I…want to understand! And I’m not! – last words were almost a cry

\- You are not, what? – she managed to confuse him

\- Beautiful. I hide them as well, you know. –

 - Hide what? –

\- Scars… - she turned to him, cuddling a smooth skin of his neck - …I hide them too. You know I have them, yet you never questioned… -

\- Neither did you… -

\- Then you understand. – he nodded

\- I do, and I don’t. I hide mine because they cause pity, at least the one that can be seen. –

\- Mine is a brand… - she started

\- Unlike mine. – he rolled the sleeve – I never glamour this, it is reminder… Yours… yours is a something you should wear with pride, Princess. They can hate you but they cannot touch you. –

\- Sticks and stones…? –

\- Something like that. – he kissed the tip of her nose – Tonight you will remove all your glamour’s. –

\- And you…? –

\- If you wish. – she nodded – Then we have an agreement, but before you run away screaming…If you want to understand, ask, and I promise, I’ll do my best to answer. Mind you that not all questions have…easily explainable answers. –

\- All right… -

\- Now you may choose…. Shall we play “20 questions” now…or… - he dragged his finger again around the rim of her choker – you…will…let...me… - the other hand drew the lines around the lace patterns on her stockings – unwrap…my gift. – he ground his hips and now extremely painful bulge to her soft backside. She gasped and mumbled

\- Later… - turning to him into a kiss – Do promise me something… -

\- What Princess? – he asked between kisses

\- Don’t hold back, please. – he groaned, did she had any idea what she did to him, what she asked of him? Dressed like this…his self-control was hanging by the thread as it was.  

\- Only if you promise me something. – breathed, trailing a line of kisses down her belly

\- I want to feel those heels on my back tonight, as you scream my name… - her breath was now fast and broken, he dragged his fingers along her spine, feeling her skin like a liquid silk flowing through his hands. She smelled of almonds and honey. – I want to feel you…fall apart…in my arms… - his teeth grazed the skin of her inner thigh just above lacy ending, dragging his tongue over the silk to her slender ankle, nipping the tendon above the heel, she moaned bucking her pelvis – time and time…again… - he repeated the move in reversed order.

Settling his shoulders between her legs, he caught skimpy silk with his teeth and pulled it lightly, letting it fall into the same place again, pressing it back with his nose, smirking at wet patch that got bigger by the second

\- So, wet…for me… - continued. Her hips danced in the air, he crawled above her, not allowing her to press next to him, hooking her legs on his shoulders, making her follow his advance, bending her in half moon position.

\- You know what to do…Princess… - he lightly bit one than the other nipple – come for me… - he whispered in her ear, sinking his teeth in a junction of neck and shoulder, grinding himself against her.

\- Gods…. Sever……… - she screamed, soaking the silk and his trousers. With a wave of his hand he banished her thong and his clothes, still holding her legs on his shoulders; he rammed himself in her rippling, quivering channel. She moaned and her muscles danced again around him. Finally, letting go he slammed in her with sharp and fast moves, watching his member disappear and appear, glistening, slick from her juices.

Her hands sprawled, to give her balance and purchase. He leaned forward, changing the angle and hovering above her. He could feel hitting her walls, but it seemed she didn’t care, she hooked her ankles on his back, smothering him with the squeeze of her thighs. She trembled again and moaned

\- That’s it…Princess…I want to hear you…feel you…one more…. – he groaned, she did follow his instruction to the letter, even in sex. He hissed as her heels found support on his back when the second orgasm hit her.

Her half-delirium mewls and moans, her attempts to impale herself at him, even in this crescent position drove him over the edge. He pounded her into the mattress, hissing and growling her name through his own trip to the heights. Finally, they untangled, tumbling to the cushions, sweaty and panting, exhausted…suddenly, he realized…this was the first Valentine’s Day in his life he celebrated…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I owe you an explanation - the song I named this chapter for, was my original inspiration...well...songs tend to change on player and mine started to play a song in my native language, one that I really like and which influenced writing. The song's name is (rough translation) Midsummer night's Torches (Baklje Ivanjske) and I don't have translation or skill to translate it (sorry!)
> 
> My Valentine - Martina McBride 
> 
> If there were no words, no way to speak  
> I would still hear you  
> If there were no tears, no way to feel inside  
> I'd still feel for you
> 
> And even if the sun refused to shine  
> Even if romance ran out of rhyme  
> You would still have my heart until the end of time  
> You're all I need my love, my valentine
> 
> All of my life  
> I have been waiting for all you give to me  
> You've opened my eyes  
> And shown me how to love unselfishly
> 
> I've dreamed of this a thousand times before  
> In my dreams I couldn't love you more  
> I will give you my heart until the end of time  
> You're all I need my love, my valentine
> 
> La a la la la
> 
> And even if the sun refused to shine  
> Even if romance ran out of rhyme  
> You would still have my heart until the end of time  
> 'Cause all I need is you, my valentine oh...  
> You're all I need my love, my valentine ohhh.


	21. Can’t take my eyes off you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The project is nearing to the end....Hermione is trying to think and reminiscent...

Hermione runs up the stairs humming, she found herself humming a lot these days. She needed a bit of fresh air and a place to think, as of late dungeons did not provide her that…place to think, that is…her brain seemed to shut down in his proximity. And every time she walked the grounds, for some reason her path would lead her where she knew he would be, her subconscious was screaming at her. She climbed the spiral staircase now, on her way to the Astronomy tower, only place he never visited…not after… She felt sad for him, wondering if staying in Hogwarts was good for him, these walls had too many bad memories, too many skeletons hanging openly, taunting him. Often, she wondered was his staying here a form of self-punishment or lack of options.  

Change between them thrown her off balance. She reached the edge of the terrace and sat with a groan, the strain he put on her back last week retaliated severely. Far from her thoughts to complain but for the…gymnastics…he provided, she needs to get into shape. Night of the St. Valentine Day and week after was an emotional roller-coaster for her, sadly, she was still on the ride – and she never liked roller-coasters of any sorts, to begin with. Her mind wandered to the conversation they had on Valentine’s night, his openness stumped her, and she wasn’t sure if he finally opened to her “ _That’s Snape, not bloody likely._ ” or if it was the subtle admission of defeat “ _Who defeated him and how is elusive to me tho._ ” … 

… _It took them a while to recover. When he had enough strength, and he seemed to have it more than she did, he placed the pillows next to the headboard; she noticed fresh scratches on his back_

_\- It seems I took you quite literally… -_

_\- It seems so, be careful what you wish for… - he replied, propping himself comfortably and pulling her next to him – First things first, glamour’s off. –_

_They both murmured the incantation, she sighed as his glamour faded, apart from the angry looking patch up skin stretching across his neck and throat, there were surprisingly few scars. He followed her amazed glare with amusement_

_\- Did you expect more? – he raised an eyebrow_

_\- Truth to be told, yes. I mean you were in two wars and I was only in one… -_

_\- Why does everybody think that anal person like Dark Lord would be in physical punishment? Sticks and stones, Princess, remember. Torture of the flesh, apart from Crushiatus, is messy and can be highly ineffective. The breaking of the mind is much more…challenging and rewarding, especially…  -_

_\- …when someone has your skills? -  he nodded_

_\- My part was not on the battlefield, Princess, unlike you… –_

_\- But you have more glamour’s than the neck, I could sense them. – he looked at her, half appraisal lingering in his gaze, slowly he straightened and turned his back to her. She gasped, his back was furrowed with old looking scars, skin that healed naturally, without magical aid after it was broken, he returned to its previous position, **hugging her** , consoling **her** “Shouldn’t be another way around?” she wondered_

_\- My father had very…creative…way of…education. – he **smiled** , she felt lost, like everything was going backwards, he was smiling and she was battling the tears – Those are old, very old, and_  _not war connected. – he chuckled – Sorry to disappoint, but I have no heroic “battle scars” to brag about. –_

_\- Except for this one. – she traced the outline of the scar on his neck with fingers – Does it hurt? – scar still looked angry and somehow raw_

_\- No, it does not. Never did, actually. Poison was strong enough to burn the nerve endings, so basically when I reached the healers, it already was a patch of … let’s call it dead…skin. It still is. Too bad I didn’t know about that property of the Nagini’s poison before, Arthur never told me anything, I’d most certainly found the way to acquire some of her venom. –_

_\- Why? –_

_\- And you call yourself a researcher? – he mocked her with a smirk – Poison with these properties might be transformed into a cure for Crushiatus victim, it wouldn’t do anything to their mental state but for the nerve damage… -_

_\- And you? Did you get help from mind-healers…? –_

_\- You deem I need one? – mocking again – They tried, it was…amusing. – he chuckled dragging a finger over the thin line going from her collarbone, between her chest to the end of her ribs – It is barely noticeable, such a waste of magic to glamour it. Same as your hand. –_

_\- But…why then…the pain…the box…And why you never call him Voldemort? –_

_\- It is hard to teach an old dog to a new trick Princess. When first was ended, apart from things I don’t want to talk about, I still had to maintain a connection, sort of an appearance in certain crowds. And, as muggles would say … when in Rome… - he shrugged – Not necessarily my cup of tea, but… -_

_\- But you…like…pain! – he chuckled_

_\- There are all sorts of pain. –_

_\- You sound like Jenny like that explains everything. –_

_\- Seems like both, Jenny and me, expect of you to use your brain. – he teased her – I do not…like…pain, not in conventional sense. And given everything I’ve been through, I can be very…unpleasant…towards those who try to inflict it. – she wanted to complain but he placed a finger on her lips, for the first time his hand seemed…cold – A small amount of pain during…well, passionate encounter…helps to focus or rather un-focus my mind, and that is all. No mystery, no deep, dark secrets, nothing of the sorts. What next…ah yes…the box; you can take it to your friend if you think she likes it. That dresser is overdue for a thorough cleaning. And yes, the name…I could not afford to think of him differently, for all intense and purpose, I was and had to stay…Death Eater. –_

_\- But you had almost ten years of peace…I mean Harry…all of us we were just born, he was gone…and… -_

_\- Thank you for the lovely reminder about our age difference – she blinked – War or not, Death Eaters were still present, some suspected that he would return, and I knew where my place is. –_

_\- It is so unfair! –_

_\- Life isn’t fair. Any more questions? –_

_\- Tons, but I don’t think I’ll ask them… - he raised his eyebrow – Be careful what you wish for…I guess. – he chuckled again, pecking her on the tip of the nose – Just one more… - he rolled his eyes – Why do you keep calling me Princess? –_

_\- Because, that’s what you are, Gryffindor Princess. -_ …

…Hermione sighed, she had a need to save him, but she wasn’t sure if her help would be welcomed. It was funny, that she saw him as someone who needed saving, especially now. And from what? Probably, this place. In a way, she could understand him for wanting to stay here, secluded from outside world.

She sighed again, the one conversation they didn’t have, not really and openly was about them, about…agreement. She wanted more, oh (!) so much more…, ” _Be realistic Hermione_ ” Long time ago she accepted the fact that he would never… **love** …her, but maybe he could…learn (?)…to like her. Just a little bit. He certainly learned to like sex with her…and that was her only hope…sex. But, even if she…could she be satisfied living like that? Knowing that only connection between them is academic and carnal…evidently, she could, and he did know how to create…mirage…of so much more. Her thoughts wandered to last night…

… _She was in the laboratory, taking notes and adjusting the temperature, their potion was almost perfected, but it was so tediously demanding that she couldn’t see many of Potion Masters and Mistresses able to reproduce it to a satisfactory level. He entered the laboratory, leaning behind her to observe the simmering concoction and landing a soft kiss on the nape of her neck._

_\- It appears adequately brewed so far. – she nodded_

_\- It is, but it is so tedious to make it. –_

_\- So are the many other, rare and complicated potions. –_

_\- Valid point. This one is just tad bit demanding, though. –_

_\- And, here, in lies the beauty of it. – his voice was like a hot caramel poured over a sundae – Its complexity and its seductive power. –_

_\- Severus, I never took you for romantic! – she smiled, scribbling, he was still standing behind her and timely and wandlessly changing temperature._

_\- Yes…I am full of surprises… - he drawled kissing her neck again, she shivered – It smells…like you… -_

_\- That, or you have your nose stuck to my skin. – she deflected – You are aware that this potion has all components of… -_

_\- Yes, - his lips travelled along the line of her jaw – did you know, that nasty little potion you are talking about, was the product of an attempt to create what you just managed to create? –_

_\- We. – her breath caught in her throat – What **we** managed to create. Yes, I know in the 13 th century… Always the educator… - she mumbled _

_\- Always the smart-mouth … - he replied, nibbling on her earlobe, she bit her lip to prevent moan, turning her eyes on him – Eyes on the potion. – he warned her – Do not allow yourself to get distracted. – he waved his hand – stirring phase is next. –_

_\- Do not distract me then. – she breathed as his lips roamed down her neck towards her decollate_

_\- This, this is not a distraction. – he murmured in her skin – Three stirs, clockwise, stirring rod in the centre, touching the cauldron lightly, full circles, wide. – gave her instructions not stopping what he was doing, which in her opinion was an attempt to melt her brain by causing short-circuit, she followed the instruction automatically – This, Princess, IS distraction. – her skirt climbed up…she was waiting – My, my…such…indecency…- she smiled – Proceed with stirring, I’ll continue to maintain temperature variations. –_

_She heard rustling of the material, then his hand found its way between her legs, he chuckled_

_\- Tsk, tsk Princess, I wonder…did you enjoy Potions this much always…or is this something…new? – she puffed a laboured breath – Stir. –_

_\- Why…why would you want to know? – panted, counting in head number and directions of stirs_

_\- That would…explain…a lot. – his hand toyed with her clitoris while other hand waved adjusting temperature, she moaned “He has no clue how much of a turn on is his magic to me.”  She stirred again, catching on the game, he chuckled and the sound run down her spine like a jolt of lightning._

_Suddenly, he tugged her, positioning her, she focused on counting…ten more seconds until the next stir. The moment she started to stir, she could feel him sliding excruciatingly slowly into her, and she moaned again, nearly missing the number of stirs._

_\- Focus, Princess. – his breath tickled her ear. His movements were slow, frustratingly slow, almost…caressing her insides. Next round of stirs nearly went haywire, she clenched her muscles, panting. She was losing focus, every time she managed to adjust and separate a small portion of her brain to fixate on counting, he would change the angle. The heat was unbearable, licking her skin outside and from inside._

_Three…two…his hand grabbed hers…they moved in unison, every whispered word was oil to the already roaring fire_

_\- Five stirs clockwise, small circles, near the cauldron edge… - not only his hand but somehow his hips followed the instructions – stirring rod in the centre, wait…. then five stirs count clockwise, from the centre, small circles. Take the rod out… - she wailed as he danced on her entrance leaving them only loosely connected, and waved his hand - …adjustment of temperature…and…let it simmer for half an hour. –_

_“He wouldn’t dare! He did! Oh, no you won’t!” He was good two steps away from her when she turned to face him, narrowing her eyes. Sly grin danced around his lips_

_\- Sloshing is bad for the potion Princess. –_

_\- There will be NO sloshing. – she growled, grabbing him by the shirt and pushing him to the stool near the table, straddling him, impaling herself. The look in his eyes was…intoxicating…beneath heavy lids, half lowered, were two burning polls of black fire. His hands found support on the nearby wall, while she allowed her body to dance in its own rhythm, using his shoulder for balance. It seemed just like a few moments passed when she guided both to completion. He stiffened, still holding to the wall, growling and grunting, she dug her head to the crook of his neck, mewling_ …

… Even on this frozen ledge, she could still feel the heat. They were perfect for each other. Maybe, just maybe she will manage to convince him to continue with this…arrangement. She must find the way. How is she going to live without him, after… Wiping the tears away, sighed, seven days…was that enough time? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This song has so many performers that I choose to list none :)  
> Can't Take My Eyes Off You
> 
> You're just too good to be true  
> can't keep my eyes off you  
> you'd feel like heaven to touch  
> I wanna hold you so much  
> at long last love has arrived  
> and I thank God I'm alive  
> you're just too good to be true  
> can't take my eyes off of you
> 
> Pardon the way that I stare  
> there's nothing else to compare  
> the sight of you makes me weak  
> there are no words left to speak  
> but if you feel like I feel  
> please let me know that it's real  
> you're just too good to be true  
> can't take my eyes off of you
> 
> I love you baby, and if it's quite alright  
> I need you baby to warm the lonely nights  
> I love you baby, trust in me when I say  
> oh pretty baby, don't bring me down, I pray  
> oh pretty baby, now that I've found you, stay  
> and let me love you, baby, let me love you...
> 
> You're just too good to be true  
> can't keep my eyes off of you  
> you'd feel like heaven to touch  
> I wanna hold you so much  
> at long last love has arrived  
> and I thank god I'm alive  
> you're just too good to be true  
> can't take my eyes off of you
> 
> I love you baby, and if it's quite alright  
> I need you baby to warm the lonely nights  
> I love you baby, trust in me when I say  
> oh pretty baby, don't bring me down, I pray  
> oh pretty baby, now that I've found you, stay  
> and let me love you, baby, let me love you...


	22. If You Leave Me Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus Snape can be a stubborn, stubborn man...bit of his POV and lot's of Hermione's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more chapter to go ;)

Severus was standing next to the high arched window, his hands folded on his back, eyes stapled to the frozen scenery. Minerva’s voice came to him in waves; he was catching on the phrases but not full sentences.

\- Severus! – he turned to meet her worried gaze  

\- My mind is made up Minerva. –

\- And there is nothing I can say to change it? –

\- No. –

\- My boy… -

\- Stay out of it Albus! – they cried in unison and portrait just huffed, turning his back on them, insulted

\- Well, if that is your decision. –

\- It is. Just send her out from here as fast as you can. – she had sadness written all over her face

\- Severus, you know…. – he started to walk towards the door

\- Minerva, you meddled into my life one time too many. I am too old and too tired to be a chess piece on somebody else’s chess board. This is for the best. If you call yourself my friend…, at least allow me to retain what little of my dignity I have left. – with those words exited from the Headmistresses office. His heart was heavy as he walked the corridors “ _I never imagined it would be this hard to let go and…Bwah, you are an old fool Severus and the world will collapse on your head._ ” This will be a hell of a fight, a trial on its own, and the hardest one he ever endured.

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

Walking down the path toward the gates Hermione stumbled; the world was flowing in front of her eyes, watered down and smeared like watercolour drawing after you spill water on it. Taking her wand, she called upon her patronus

\- Harry, I don’t care what you are doing, be at my flat in 15 minutes. I need you… - she sent patronus with a message, Harry will probably have a fit but she didn’t care…

… _She run into their…his…quarters. He was standing at the table in the laboratory, fiddling with some equipment._

_\- Severus, I’m ready to leave. –_

_\- Mhm. – he answered and looked at her – I believe it is for the best that we move back to proper addressing again Miss Granger. –_

_Her heart sunk down, descending to the pit of her stomach with a painful thud, he wasn’t mean, and his voice was…his old – deployed of all emotions, same as his face and his eyes._

_\- I was hoping… - she started_

_\- We had an agreement Miss Granger; I do hope that you will honour its ending. However, if you need, my offer still stands… -_

_\- You know I’ll just… -_

_\- Miss Granger, it is only fair to inform you that I successfully terminated my contract with the ministry as an advisor. This was my last project in that capacity. –_

_\- Then, maybe when I come to see Minerva… -_

_\- I’m leaving Hogwarts; my resignation is already submitted and accepted. –_

_\- I can owl you to Spinner’s End… -_

_\- The property is sold. –_

_\- What will you do? Where will you stay? – she did her best to fight the tears, they stung the back lids of her eyes, he just gazed at her with empty gaze – How can I find you then? –_

_\- You won’t, not unless I desire to be found. -_

_\- Will we see each other again? –_

_\- Maybe, you never know. -_

_\- It is entirely my fault, isn’t it? – realization hit her like a ton of bricks, pounded above her head into the ground with a swarm of angry bludgers – You are…I pushed you too far and you are disappearing. I forced you to leave the only place you can call home! –_

_\- I wouldn’t go that far. –_

_\- All you wanted is peace and quiet and I destroyed that! –_

_\- It was my time to change the scenery; you helped me to realize that. For your effort, you have my eternal gratitude. -_

_\- I don’t want your gratitude! – snapped hitting the table with both fists_

_\- Miss Granger, I would appreciate if you do not break any of the equipment some of the parts are expensive and rather hard to come by. –_

_\- What will you do? I can talk to the Head of the Department and Kingsly … -_

_\- Thank you, Miss Grange, arrangements have already been made. –_

_She took a long, shuddering breath “He won’t see my tears.”, straighten her back and looked him in the eyes_

_\- In that case, Master Snape, thank you for your guidance and assistance. I do hope that on your new job you will have all necessary requirements to complement your talent. –_

_\- Thank you, Miss Granger. Have a safe trip home. –_

_She just nodded and left the laboratory. He didn’t even see her out_ …

…Reaching the apparating point, she forced herself to compose and apparated directly into her living room.

\- Hermione… - Harry sounded worried, she spun around and hugged him, painful wail she was holding back turned into uncontrollable sobs. Harry just hugged her. It seemed like she cried for hours, she could hear Ginny and Jenny whispering in the background but couldn’t muster the strength to separate from Harry or stop crying. Finally, well of tears dried out, Harry gently moved her away and guided her to the sofa

\- Hermione? –

\- I ruined everything, Harry! He is going away, disappearing! I drove him away! – tears started to roll again, Jenny handed her a towel

\-  You said you are happy… -

\- I was. And I ruined everything. –

\- If you like I can try and talk to him… - Harry was uncertain but the worry was plainly written all over his face – After seeing you like this, he certainly… -

\- You don’t understand! –

\- Then explain it to me. –

\- I am **in love** with him, for years! And I just couldn’t sit on it anymore, so I did what I always do, I went for it. And now, he has no choice but to run away. –

\- Why would he run? – Ginny asked softly

\- Because he knows me. He knows I won’t leave him be. –

\- Why you never told me? –  

\- Yeah, that’s a conversation with great punch line “Harry, you know the bloke who is in love with your mum, the one who almost died 'cos of his promise to her? Well, I am in love with him, can I have our blessing?” – sobs broke out again with renewed strength.

Hours later, three of them finally managed to calm her down. Jenny handed her an envelope with Ministry stamp on it

\- This arrived while ago, we received it. It is from your work. –

She tore the edge and read through the letter

\- Can this day be any worse! They can’t do this to me, just can’t! Listen “We are informing you that we found you a project partner since Master Snape resigned from its post as your advisor. You will share an office with your new partner according to the contract we signed with him, starting Monday.” I **don’t want** another partner! –

\- Hermione, maybe it’s for the best… -

\- They’ll assign me some incompetent rich kid who doesn’t know how to tie his shoelaces. I won’t stand for that! –

~ S ~ S ~ S ~

She cried through the weekend, Harry, Ginny and Jenny stayed with her, doing their best to console her, but how could they…her entire world collapsed.

Walking into the laboratory on Monday, anger flared inside her… Everything, **everything** was moved, her ledgers scattered all over the work table with little notes pasted to them. With a growl, she picked up one…notes was written with dicta-quill, **her** dicta-quill! “ _Un-sorted information, rewrite it! I’ll give you un-sorted, I’ll re-write your face with a hefty hex!_ ” going to the storeroom to make herself a tea before she enters her office and really hexes the intruder growled again, even here everything as moved and rearranged, her cup was missing. Storming to her office, she started from the door

\- Listen, Mister, I do not know who you are or you think you are, but you are in **my** office, and you are going to follow **my rules** … – then abruptly stopped, her armchair was moved to the other side and replaced with a high antique armchair on her spot, top drawer on her table was open and her diary was missing, **her private diary** – That is **private** , return it now! –

Notebook flew through the air and she catches it, not even wanting to know who it was, she stormed directly to the Department Head’s office, clenching her diary

-  I do not care who he is…I want him **out!** –

\- Miss Granger… -

\- I don’t care how rich or influential his family is, I **don’t** want that…that…in my office, or as my partner. In fact, I am here long enough to know that I do not require mentor, adviser or partner. –

\- We only acted on your request… - she sighed, she handed that request hoping to persuade Severus to join her, that was a painful reminder of her foolishness - …and now we have a contract with him. Miss Granger, why don’t you give the bloke a chance… -

\- Oooh I will, I’ll give him the chance to apologize for rearranging my laboratory, my storage and my office without consorting me first. By the end of the day, you’ll have a choice me or him! And, let me remind you that per **my contract** I have right for all intellectual property of my research… -

\- Only if you can cover the research cost. –

\- …For this last research, I’ll cover all the costs, including Master Snape’s fee. Any facility in the world will want me with this in my hands, and they already do. **I. Can. Choose.** –

\- Miss Granger! –

\- Good day. – she turned on her heel and walked out. They won’t do that to her, no way! Considering her options, she downsized her options to three countries Tahiti (small facility but renown in the middle of the Paradise), Malaysia (big and fancy laboratory with substantial funds) and Japan (that just sounded far away, she liked far away).

Entering the laboratory, she stapled herself to the floor, her eyes narrowed, magic angrily crackled around her “ _Definitely Japan!_ ” her brain finished the thought, separated from the rest of her. All she managed to squeeze was one menacing, angry

-You. –

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If You Leave Me Now - Chicago
> 
> If you leave me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me  
> Ooohh no  
> Baby please don't go  
> And if you leave me now, you'll take away the very heart of me  
> Ooohh no  
> Baby please don't go  
> Ooohh girl  
> I just want you to stay
> 
> A love like ours is love that's hard to find  
> How could we let it slip away  
> We've come too far to leave it all behind  
> How could we end it all this way  
> When tomorrow comes and we'll both regret  
> The things we said today
> 
> A love like ours is love that's hard to find  
> How could we let it slip away  
> We've come too far to leave it all behind  
> How could we end it all this way  
> When tomorrow comes and we'll both regret  
> The things we said today
> 
> If you leave me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me  
> Ooohh no  
> Baby please don't go  
> Ooohh girl  
> I just got to have you by my side  
> Ooohh no  
> Baby please don't go  
> Ooohh mama  
> I just got to have your loving here


	23. Glory of love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is it...THE END...
> 
> I want to thank you for all your comments and support, also for baring with me and my broken English :)

Corridors echoed with her voice  

\- Get out, out, out, out! – her shrill screech caused the crowds to gather in front of the office – I don’t want your apology! I don’t want excuses! I **want you out of my sight THIS INSTANT!!!** –  

\- But Hermione… -

\- **Miss Grainger, for you idiot!!!** –

-  Oww…Miss Granger! –

\- You are the so-called expert. Block this you…you…nincompoop…moron! OUT OF MY OFFICE!!! - 

Crowds disperse as Mr Tipit run out of Hermione’s laboratory, attempting to block or dodge the curses she hurled at him.

\- Miss Granger! – strict and a bit terrified voice of her boss finally forced her to stop – What is going on? –

\- You…, you assigned that moron to be my partner?! –

\- Miss Granger, control yourself. **That** is not your new co-worker; I have no idea who that man is. –

\- I suggest that you check our security then because I found that idiot in my laboratory! Japan! I am seriously thinking Japan! –

\- Miss Granger… -

\- And now, I’m going to hex the moron **you did** assign to me **out of my laboratory and my office** as well. –

Footsteps approached, doors slammed…then she was frozen once again, blinking, utterly confused

\- So, will you hex me, though I strongly advise against it, or you are attempting to blink me to death? – asked. Severus felt like his heart is going to give out, the air was still crackling with magic, her eyes were fiery and her face flushed “ _Merlin, she is gorgeous._ ” 

\- Seve…Master Snape…? – she whispered, stapled to the spot and quite angry. Fighting to maintain his detached exterior, Severus forced himself to stay in the same spot, surveying her face, desperately hoping for any sign that he is, in fact, welcomed in his new, and now very shaky position, and in her life… But she just stared at him blankly, so he remained silent…waiting for the verdict. Minutes passed…every second dragged excruciatingly slow… Finally, she blinked, her eyes full of mist and slightly watery…voice a ghost of a whisper – You…say something… -

\- You, Miss Granger, will be the sole reason for my untimely departure from this mortal coil. – she blinked again “ _Maybe that is not what she wanted to hear._ ” he sighed, turning to leave her office he mumbled – I will send someone for my things, preferably **not** Mr Tipit. -  

“ _Well, you messed it up royally now Severus. Maybe Congreve is right – Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned – with my track record… I and love are unmixable things as it seems._ ” Suddenly, his hands were full of a weeping witch.

Hermione got him in a death grip, her face buried in his chest wailing, her hands gripping fistfuls of material. Hexing him, even hurling things at him would be preferable than this…he was amiss…not knowing how to console her, especially because **he was** the cause…he would most definitely prefer her hexing him…

…Footsteps approached from the other room and he waved his hand towards the door if she wants to disassemble him – that was her prerogative, but he won’t allow anyone to see her in this state. The doorknob rattled, once, twice, and then footsteps went away. She still bawled, soaking not only the wool but also the shirt beneath, he warily eyed the tea mug wondering if one would be enough to prevent dehydration. However, the pressing worry was…how to make her stop crying.

-  Miss Granger… - that only added the fuel to the fire – Hermione… - she let out a something between a whine and a howl, more tears followed – Princess… - a new river of tears accompanied with hiccup sounds, she pressed her face to his chest and he was now seriously concerned that she’s going to die from suffocation – For Merlin’s name do something…anything… - he knew his voice held all the desperation he felt, but in that moment he couldn’t bring himself to care. But…that seems to do the trick, she separated her face from him, still holding on to him and blinked. Droplets of tears rolled down her cheeks and hung on her eyelashes like small diamonds “ _You never ever going to gift her diamonds, **never.**_ ” 

\- Like what? – she managed to hiccup

\- I don’t know…hex me. – he offered, she blinked again

\- Why would I do that? –

\- Because you will probably be less cruel than I would be if I’m to hex myself. –

 - Why would you hex yourself? –

\- I obviously did something to upset you this much, I deem I deserved it. – she blinked at him again

\- You lied to me. –

\- I did not! –

\- Yes, you did! – she thumped her leg on the floor, such a childish gesture he never saw her do, even when she was first-year

\- Care to explain, **how did I lie,** Miss Granger? –

\- You said that we will never see each other again. –

\- I did not, as I recall my answer was “maybe” -  

\- You told me I can’t owl you! – 

\- Not to my recall, I told you that Spinner’s End is sold, which is the truth. That property does not belong to me anymore. –

\- You said you do not work for Ministry anymore!! – she was getting angry

\- No, I said I terminated my contract as an advisor. –

\- But you are here! –

\- Correct. –

\- How? –

\- I cannot be hired as outside adviser if I am employed by the Ministry. – 

\- And Hogwarts… -

\- It would be very hard to teach and work for the Ministry at the same time, and as I am no longer a member of teaching staff, my residence in Hogwarts ended with my contract. –

\- You said our arrangement is over! –

\- That is correct. It is over. –

\- WHY?!!! – she screamed at him, finally separating herself

\- I didn’t like it… - the new stream of tears, rolled down her cheeks – Miss Granger, can you at least wait until I finish my sentence? – she nodded, but tears continued to roll just the same - …I didn’t like the terms of our…arrangement. –

\- But…why? –

\- What was our arrangement? –

\- Well, …. Right… I… I don’t know… - she stuttered

\- Well, this is probably once in a lifetime opportunity, to hear Hermione Granger saying that she doesn’t know something. – he smiled and she glared at him – But, on to the conversation, neither did I, apart from the fact that we agreed it would last as long as you are in Hogwarts doing research. Correct? –

\- Yes. –

\- I didn’t find that appealing, and your research was finished. It was not incorrect to deduce that out arrangement was at its end. –   

\- But you let me believe… -

\- I only answered your questions, and I did not volunteer additional information, true, but I never lied to you. –

\- I was under the impression… -  

\- So was I. – she blinked again, at this point she probably did have at least some idea about blinking him to death. He longed to see even a glimmer of understanding in her eyes, but they were just immeasurably sad and confused – I was under the presumption that I was…am…talking to the “brightest witch of her age”. Apparently, we were both incorrect. –

\- So, you still want to be with me?  -

\- Yes, very much so. If you want me…that is. – he replied, a sharp jab in his chest made his breath bit irregular, she just stared at him, he waited, hoping that this torment will end soon

\- Good, - she finally took pity on him, and he let the air fill his lungs, unaware until that point that he held his breath -  Where are you staying now? –

\- I still don’t have permanent residence, as of last night, a room is rented… -

\- No. –

\- Beg your pardon? –

\- I said **no** , I’m not letting you out of my sight. I have a guest room and… - 

\- I do not want to disappoint, but that would not work for me. – this was unfair to her, but he couldn’t resist, maybe the whole conversation would have much different tone, more depressing or scarier (at least on his part) if he didn’t read her diary. Precious knowledge he gathered from those pages now gave him strength and courage.

\- And just **what** would work for **you**? Provided that you have a choice, of course. –

It was his turn to blink, how he could find the right words, how he could explain the depth of his feelings? “ _But, she didn’t ask you about your feelings…she asked you what sleeping arrangements you would prefer._ ” But that was it, that was one and the same – for him. He blinked again; she was mincing her bottom lip looking at him. Deciding that action might be a better solution, hoping that she will read into it accordingly, he pulled her to him and crushed his lips on hers. The thought that she might still refuse him, regardless of what he read, caused a dull pain in his back and under the ribs peak.

She stiffened, then relaxed in his arms, smiling, mumbling into the kiss

\- You are absolutely right, that won’t do. Besides, the bed in my room is bigger and much more comfortable. – she moved her head away, staying in his embrace – We will agree upon new terms later on, but now, we are at work. – he nodded – Oh, and Severus… - her hand feathered across his cheek and jaw

\- Yes? –

\- …if you ever do this to me again… - he hissed when his leg went numb, she was holding her wand pressed to his thigh and jabbed him with nasty stinging hex - …I promise you, I **will** hex you to oblivion. –

~ S ~ S ~ S ~ 

That evening, she was huddled next to him; they were picking up last dumplings from a takeout box of Chinese food.

\- I still think that we could cook. –

\- If you want to live, I would not recommend my cooking. –

\- Didn’t you cook during your seventh year? –

\- I did, but stores have a short supply of disgustingly tasting mushrooms and wild sour greens. -  

\- Did it ever occur to you that I can cook? –

\- It did, but I had other plans. –

\- One of them obviously being to postpone conversation we agreed upon. – she pinched him, hard – Madam, did anyone ever told you that you have a problem with aggression? –

\- No one dares, why? – she giggled, and he realized he missed hearing that sound all day.

\- Just asking… - mocked and she giggled again. – It is my duty to inform you, I refuse to go to bed until we talk. – she frowned, chewing on her bottom lip, he felt the urge to rescue the molested soft tissue – Hermione, what are you afraid of? –

\- It’s not that I’m…afraid…more that…I had a really lousy weekend, and I’d rather left painful talks for later…or never…or at least much, much later. –

\- You are worse than Dumbledore, talking in riddles. Will I lose house points for a miss on an answer? – she smiled weakly and he started to worry

\- All right, ummm…right…I know…well, you read my diary… - 

\- I did. –

\- You won’t even apologize for that! –

\- No, I won’t. I rather enjoyed the reading, and I never apologize for reading a good material. You are avoiding again. –

\- Yes, well…then you know… - 

\- I do. – he kissed her on a temple and she stirred somewhat uncomfortably

\- You see, I know…well, the thing is… well, it is, sadly, common knowledge…and Harry told me a bit more maybe…and I really have no problem…I know… -

\- At one point, preferably in this lifetime, I do hope that I will know too. –

\- IknowyoustillloveLilyandIamokwiththatreallyamIknowyoucouldneverlovemethatway. – he stared at her trying to sort out through what she just **didn’t** say 

\- Can you repeat that; choose any understandable human language or gobbledegook this time. – 

\- I know you still love Lily and I am ok with that, really am, I know you could never love me that way. – she repeated slowly, keeping her eyes tightly shut – And, that is totally fine. As long as you can…well…you think that we could be together, and I do want a relationship but if you don’t it is fine too… - she frowned – …I think. I mean…-

\- Stop! – he sighed “ _Is she for real?_ ” – I was under the false assumption that I am with the “brightest witch of her age” but today you keep proving me wrong in a most painful way. -  she gawked at him and he pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head – I am here, am I not? – she nodded, slowly, apparently chewing on his answer…and her lip. He pinched her bottom lip, pulling it out of her teeth - I also happen to be fond of that part, so I would appreciate if you refrain from your cannibalistic tendencies from now on. –  

\- So, you are telling me that you **want** to be **with me**? –

\- If I’m not, I am in the wrong place. – 

\- In a relationship? –

\- For the start… -

\- And later…? –

\- We will see how long you will need before you run off screaming. – he replied seriously and she gave a little squeal jumping on him to squash him in an embrace

\- Hermione! – yelped when sauce from crushed takeout box coated him – Well, now I need a bath. –

She looked at him and shiver run down his spine

\- Nope, you don’t. Good thing you are naked. – she runs her tongue from his navel up to his collarbone, lapping the sauce,  now he was biting his lip to suppress the groan – Mmmmmmm, I think this is my new favourite…Dumpling flavoured Potions Master. - 

His last coherent thought was “ _Well, that’s it then…isn’t it?_ ” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Glory Of Love - Peter Cetera
> 
> Tonight it's very clear  
> 'Cause we're both lying here  
> There's so many things I wanna say  
> I will always love you  
> I would never leave you alone
> 
> Sometimes I just forget  
> Say things I might regret  
> It breaks my heart to see you crying  
> I don't wanna lose you  
> I could never make it alone
> 
> I am a man who will fight for your honor  
> I'll be the hero you're dreaming of  
> We'll live forever  
> Knowing together  
> That we did it all for the glory of love
> 
> You keep me standing tall  
> You help me through it all  
> I'm always strong when you're beside me  
> I have always needed you  
> I could never make it alone
> 
> I am the man who will fight for your honor  
> I'll be the hero  
> You've been dreaming of  
> We'll live forever  
> Knowing together that we did it all  
> For the glory of love 
> 
> It's like a knight in shining armor  
> From a long time ago  
> Just in time I will save the day  
> Take you to my castle far away
> 
> I am the man who will fight for your honor  
> I'll be the hero that your dreaming of  
> We're gonna live for ever  
> Knowing together  
> That we did it all for the glory of love
> 
> We'll live forever  
> Knowing together  
> That we did it all for the glory of love  
> We did it all for love


End file.
